The Kardasian Effect.

Today's Tids Issue #2413

Opening Stuff:

September has always been my favorite months just because of how nicely it reflected the changing, to beautiful cool weather and crisp air, and thoughts of the wonderful Fall to come. And always because one of my favorite persons was born in the month. On 9/11! So now the month has become a reminder of evil lurking and a tribute to courage. And I feel that deep within. But I still love seeing the grass get green and rich again, the sound of the first football kickoff, the kids happy to be back at school -- for a day or two, and the stars in the sky that tinkle brighter through crystalline air.

We live in a nation that enabled Kim Kardashian to make an $18 Million profit from her wedding! You remember the Kardashian kiddies, the little tykes in background photos showing OJ enabler Robert Kardashian. They rose to fame on a leaked Kim sex tape, inviting paparazzi to snap her pic getting into limos pantiless, becoming friends with well know H-Wood sleazes, rehab stays, lawsuits and marrying D-Lister's like Odom with an ability to get in the news. And now add a brother Rob (A mere 24 also rising on a wave of sordid promotions -- i.e. ex-Gal Pal miscarriage) to the dysfunctional reality show mix, who draws 3,200,000 viewers on his debut! Think about that for a moment. 3.2 Million American lemmings walking off cliff to nowhere. The problem is that this is a lot like the way our political system operates these days. Even some pundits on both sides are agreeing that the Obama rise was indeed more Hype than Hope. It was an election won on slogans delivered by a master, energetic, campaigner with a lot of brains. But the substance. Alas, the substance. That's why I use a Zero (0) in front 0-Man, and not an "O". In case you didn't notice. He never walked the walk. He just maxed out the Kardashian effect. In other words, don't write off his re-election. Anything can happen in America.

If you feel a little stickiness from the defibrillator paddles they're using on you, its because the EMT's used them to make paninis.

The Question:
Name some of Lily Tomlin's best characters.

The Headlines:

--Positive: Manufacturing Numbers Surprise upward, Unemployment Claims Lower; Negative: Main Street Misses Clueless Lane Views For August. DOW Off By18 At Noon.
--Gadhafi Vows No Surrender.
--Venus Williams Bows Out Of US Tennis; Stricken By Immune System Illness That Could End Career.
--0-Man Moves Jobs Speech After Boehner Complains Of Bad date Selection Against GOP Debate.
--Wild Fire Rips Through 6,200 Acres In Northern Texas.
--Goldman Says Its Mortgage Subsidiary Will Stop Robo-Signings.
--Secy Of Ed Arne Dunn Says Teachers Starting Salaries Should be Same As Engineers.

I liked the editorial page cartoon by Seneman: (Two Today eGuys) One says -- "I can't believe that Steve Jobs is resigning. Who's going to convince me to buy stuff I clearly can't afford?"

One of the tools used to trigger the Kardashian Effect is exaggeration. Currenty in use among the Tea party haters is the idea questioning why TP'ers want Big Government help now that a flood has them standing on their roof tops. Clearly that is as stupid as it sounds. Nobody wants to eliminate government., In fact almost all with a brain believe that one of the true needs for a government and why they pay taxes to it, is for help in massive disasters or defense of the porous brooders or, yes, safety nets for the disadvantaged. They want the roads kept up by local governments and schools run well and economically. And of course favorable treaties with foreign governments. What they don't want is generally all around meddling by overstuffed government with too many people doing too many senseless things like discovering how lint from bellybuttons can eliminate sagging breast for older women..and men. Or telling you what to eat and what kind of friends you should have.

Did you watch Susan Boyle last night sing magnificently. Was it me, or did all of you who watched also happen to think she was in a catatonic state while standing their at the end. It was a weird moment. But, the woman can sing.

Of course exaggeration and general all around lying is the preferred agenda for the anti-tea Party and other anti-conservative groups. For instance, when a Tea Party says it wants a return to the good old days where people lived within their means and paid there bills on time, a Black causcus group has just shouted, "The good old days means they want a return to slavery!" How stupid is that. And that is just the most recent example of disingenuous politicking. But of course, as stupid as that sounds you know that the Kardashian Effect will take over and people shout in unison "Amen brother. Amen!"

Breakfast at Fast Food "Restaurants" accounts for 60 % of the industry segment's recent growth. Now for many of these companies, oatmeal with berries is their new game hoping for a trip to the nutritionists Hall of Fame. Let's see, sausage, egg, cheese on a croissant helped them grow 60% and now they're going for berries. I'm thinking like egg, boned smoked spareribs and white gravy on biscuit! EeeeeHah!

Locals in tourist towns have their secret little haunts that provide good meals at non-tourist prices. But then, they get discovered by some food critic at the big city newspaper and now you can't get in.

Almost Near: Chapter 37. --At first the Kids were shy and very reluctant to talk to the pretty stranger in their Aunt's house. But Aunt Florence told them not to worry, and they came forward. Slowly, as if walking on the proverbial egg shells. Shiela was a pretty little girl, about twelve, Audrey thought. She was nicely dressed in khaki shorts and a light blue golf shirt and sandals with little pink painted toenails peeking out. Flat chested, flat bottomed and straight up and down on the sides. Audrey could see she loved to smile but she certainly wasn't doing it right now. Now Rebecca was another story. She had a grimace, and for a 13 year old a very mature body. She looked as if she wore a permanent frown. Her black T-Shirt said "Razorbacks Smell" over a picture of the ugliest pig I or anybody ever saw. She wore jeans and work boots. Audey stood and smiled when the entered, put out her hand. The girls stood still with their n=hands behind their backs.
"I won't bite. People are worried about you I came to help. But, believe me, I'm tellin' nobody nothin'."
''Especially Daddy and Bounty."
"Why not Daddy?"
"Mom said daddy is bad and that's why she sent us down here to Aunt Florence."
"Daddy is bad. I hope mom killed him." Audrey hadn't expected a peep out of Rebecca. Her cell phone rang.
Audrey looked down at the message and smiled. "Hi, this was bad and a good time, good becasue I like talking to you any time and bad becasue I was just starting to have nice chat with the girls." Audrey looked over at the pair. Rebecca was still frowning, but didn't seem as tense.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and I'm not beholding any beauty in the Kardashians.

Steve Forbes said today that Barak Obama's Economic proposals "Are the definition of insanity -- Repeating programs hoping for different results."

The Answer:
Of course there is Earnestine and "One ring-dingy". But I liked Edith Ann better. And there was Lud and Marie. And she is known for the line,"Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse." She won Tony's for her own One Woman Broadway show,Appearing Nightly, and another for The Search for Intelligent Signs in the Universe. She own a Grammy for a comedy album "This is a Recording." In the movies you remember her in 9 to5, All of Me, The Incredible Shrinking Woman, Big Business and The Prairie Home Companion. "Don't be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity someone wishes they missed."

Marc Anthony Says he will always love Jennifer. See.. the Tids guy, ever the romantic.

"I worry that the person who thought up Muzak may be thinking up something else." Lily Tomln

I had more, but this is taking too long. Stay tuned tomorrow.