Today's Tids Issue 2,125
Opening Stuff:
I paused for a moment yesterday to think about the many god-damned good friends I have had during my life. How they aren’t of one gender, race or ethnicity; or rich or poor; they are young and old; They can be successful or not so much; athletes or intellectuals; There are no guide lines that can help you determine your next friend. Something just clicks. Friendship is one of the great gifts of life. And, I savor them all.
Talk about typos. The Tids has never mis-punched a key like the klutz on Wall Street yesterday. The Klutz who Killed Konvidence Keyed in-Korrectly and my savings got Klobbered. Kouple that with Komputer programmed Komplicity and you have a Katastrophe. And it ain’t Okay with me.
Hey, the good news, we are assured by financial expert analysts that lots of brokers made huge pots of money with deft buying at the bottom. Kinda makes your heart leap for joy doesn’t it.
It looks like the NFL’s “All Time Greatest Defensive Player” is about to become the All Time NFL Defendant!
That "Giant Box" over the runaway oil well reminds me of what I do when the “Check Engine” light comes on in my car. I cover it over with black electrical tape! No problem.
The Question:
“I can’t get no…sat-is-faction…” Try humming that – or dancing around the house -- for the rest of the day, while thinking of your portfolio meltdown. It is one of the all time infectious tunes, at least to me. Name five other Rolling Stones mega hits.
Weekend Bonus Q: Why his Gibbs long time pal and medical examiner on NCIS called “Ducky”?
The Headlines:
--Wall Street Abuzz About The Numbskull Nosedive; Tids Editorial Board Urges Class Action Suit For Average Investors Against Fatfinger.
--Jobs Report Paradoxical: New Jobs In April At 290,000; Unemployment Grows To 9.9%; Underemployment Grows 17.1% Near All Time High Of 17.4%.
--England Conservative Garners Most Votes But Missed Required Number For Control; English Government Could Become Unstable.
--Stock Futures Point Higher; Fears That Euro Debt Crisis Could Spread Remain High..
--BP Puts Giant Box Over Leaky Well.
--Pakistan Taliban Say NYC Bomber Not One Of Us; But Cheer His Efforts To Terrorize Gotham.
--NK’s Kim Expresses Willingness To Resume Nuke Discussions.
--E.Coli Discovery Forces Lettuce recall; Tids Urges Banning Of Lettuce In School Lunch Programs.
--RI’s Burgeoning “Hall Of Shame” Grows By Three As North Providence City Council Members Are Arrested for Bribery.
Back to More Stuff:
Words and phrases you should never use at work, unless of course you don’t want the responsibilities associated with good career. In other words, if you don’t want to be a non-entity avoid: “Try”, “Whatever”, “Maybe”, “I don’t know”, “I’ll get back to you”, “If”, “Yes, but”, “I guess” and “we’ll see”. In other words be positive, assertive and respectful. I guess. Whatever.
Why our leaders make me feel safe Department:
Yesterday the ever brilliant Ben Bernanke said, “Banks should loan to creditworthy borrowers.”! How brilliant is that. How revolutionary! What guts. Why didn’t I think of that …”Lend to people who can pay you back”. Glad he’s getting the big bucks.
So, do you think that the Gore-ster built his $9,000,000 Ocean Side mansion on the only point of land not to be engulfed by his predicted GW induced rising sea? Al Gore, one of the great phonies in American history.
Has there ever been a more appropriate name for a leader of an African nation than that of Nigeria’s new president – Goodluck Jonathon! He’ll need it.
You know you are going to see columns by fawning sports writers about all of the hardships the great Lawrence Taylor had to over come in life. While a beaten and confused, defenseless 16 year old girl wonders what the confusing world she sees holds in store for her.
Through the Same Eyes; Chapter 70 continues. –Izzy and I had our usual good meeting and were now finishing a nice friendly lunch. I think we admire each other equally and never play the one-upmanship game. That’s why we accomplish so much in short meetings. We are jointly managing is a complicated financial structure at the moment; one primarily designed to bring the company public at the right moment. It is a tough time right now for IPO’s, but the bigger issue in my mind right now is the cloud over the research program. Izzy is less sensitive to the fortuitous nature of the giant technological advance and the fact that it was the result of a criminal act.
Rather that constantly confronting her over it, I decided to keep the positive side of our work moving while I find out more about the Bromsky mess myself. As lunch came to an end, I asked, “What does Middleton say about the Bromsky data. Does he seem disturbed that it wasn’t result of his and his teams personal efforts?”
“Kent is as happy as clam in clean salt water” She smiled confidently, probably reassuring any misgivings she may actually have over the mess. ‘You know, Kent is a pragmatist.”
‘’What was Kent’s reaction when you hired Bromsky to run a parallel program? Great idea by the way”.
“You know how hard it is to read Mr. Middleton’s mind.” She laughed a knowing laugh.
Is it, I thought.
Reading Between the Lines Movie Reviews:
--The big hit of the Weekend is the highly anticipated Iron Man 2. The major problem with it is that all of the cool stuff from the original appears old hat in this sequel. The acting by Robert Downy, Mickey O’Rourke, Gwyneth Paltrow and Scarlet Johansson is very good. And the plot about Tony’s resistance to pressure from the government to reveal his technology, isn’t bad either. It’s just that fans come to these type of movies to be thrilled. And they aren’t there. So maybe it will be better for me. Maybe I should put it on my Netflix list
Scientists have proven what many women have always thought – men are Neanderthals. Yes new DNA research says it is official that the humans of today are direct descendents of Neanderthals. But after all of the millions have been spent, and all of the scientific backs have been robustly slapped with joy, I have to ask…”So?”
The Answer:
Satisfaction is certainly one of the top faves. “Lady Jane” is one of my personal favorites. Then you have Time is on My Side, Get off of My Cloud, 19th Nervous Breakdown, Let’s Spend the Night Together, She’s a Rainbow, Jumpin’ Jack Flash and another I particularly enjoy, Ruby Tuesday. They had 91 singles, so there are going to be a lot of “Number Ones”. Pick you favorite and hum along.
Weekend bonus Answer: You probably all guessed that it is because the David McCallum character is Doctor “Mallard”!
The Grand Finale':
I can’t help it. Every time I see the words “Giant Box” in news stories about the oil leak problem, I just find myself laughing.
If today’s music was any good you wouldn’t need all of the lights, smoke, weird costumes and makeup. You could just stand there nekid on the stage and sing them.
Lots of potato chips for school lunch programs would effectively eliminate the fear of E. Coli.
And, my levity over the Giant Box is tempered by the big decision I have to make this evening at 7:00 EDT – whether to watch the Celtics in a must win game, the Bruins in a series clincher or the Red Sox against the Ya-ya-ya…(WYKWIM). Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrgh!!
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