Today's Tids Issue 2,163
Opening Stuff:
Our California watchdog informs us that California welfare recipients are allowed to use their state issued debit cards to withdraw money at casinos for gambling. Is this a great country or what!
“Free Balloons” Department:
I can hear the first graders asking, “Now exactly what am I supposed to do with this” as the school nurses in Provincetown, Massachusetts hand condoms!! Yikes. But that is the requirement of a new law in this quaint Tip-O-the-Cape town which is well known as a haven for the gay. Are the minds of residents so attuned to flamboyant sexual activity that they have lost sight of the possibility of rational behavior among their youngest? Maybe we could ask Elena Kagan about that.
The Question:
Name the five top characters on “The Love Boat” and the actors who played them. What was the real name of the boat?
The Headlines:
--RI Dem Convention Snubs Powerful Lynch Brother team; Endorses Caprio (Gov.), Cicilini (Congress); History Shows That Endorsed Candidates Not Sure Things In Primaries.
--Kagan Questioning Begins In Earnest Today.
--10 Long Time Soviet Moles Arrested.
--High Court Rules Hand Guns Ok.
--Stocks Expected To Go Lower On World Worries.
--Poor Housing, Jobs Reports Combined With continuing Large Retail Sales Indicate Declining Economy Or A Recovery That never Happened; Economists Crying New Blues.
--Supreme Court Says Ok To Proceed Against The Vatican In Sexual Abuse Case; Vatican Maintains It Has No Liability.
Back to More Stuff:
I heard the question asked on a radio program, “Is Bill Clinton worried that the Al Gore sexual dalliance with a massage therapist will place a stain on his administration?” It’s one of those things I wish I thought of first.
The stuff about the health care program is leaking out like a slow water board to Abu Grabe. The latest I have heard is a 3.5% tax on real estate transactions beginning after the next Presidential election in 2013.That means that if you sell your house for $400K the government gets $14 Thou! That’s great news for downsizing retirees.
Meat and Potatoes Department:
Remember when potato based Vodka was the favorite of alcoholics because it was odorless. But then came fruit flavored vodkas and it became hard to tell if a person was drinking too much or just a health nut. Now you have to wonder if vodka makers are drinking too much. With the introduction of “Smoked Salmon” and “Bacon” vodkas you can shortly expect “Meat “ flavored vodkas. “Don’t you think Bob smells a little like ground chuck?” Beef breath will become the new term of disfavor. And a how about Sally got porked last night? Whoops.
Russian Roulette Department:
One of the more relaxing places in this universe is the summer outdoor shower. That is, until you hear distant thunder. And you have just begun. You start counting the seconds between rumble and flash. 11seconds! Toes, ankles, calves. 10 seconds. Thighs, waste, butt. 9 seconds. Arms, chest, back. 7 seconds. Time to wash the hair. Where is that shampoo? Damn! 6 seconds. Wash. Rinse. 4 seconds. You take a deep breath. Is there time for a shave. Go for it. Oops a nick. No time to stop the bleeding. Get the chin. Oh no, I missed some on the neck. Phew! Finished. Flash!! 2 seconds. Time to dry. It’s starting to rain. Can’t dry any how. Don’t for get to wrap the towel around your waste. Don’t panic. Run…now. Inside. EeeeeHah! Crrrrrrrrack!
Of course…I could just stand out in the rain and lightening and get washed and dried at the same time! Ouch.
George Will wonders how Elena Kagan would react to the observation by James Madison: “The powers delegated by the proposed Constitution to the federal government are few and defined. Those which remain in the state governments are numerous and indefinite.”
Actually, Will raises and suggests many good questions for the woman who has an “Aversion to vapid and hollow” (Confirmation hearings) devoid of “Legal analysis.” Like, what would be her opinion on whether or not the fed’s enumerated powers on interstate commerce could cover just about everything from obesity to poor student testing to mandates for carrying health care insurance. Will wonders what her opinion might have been on watching “equal opportunity” under the new1960’s Civil Rights Law transform immediately into “Unequal” Opportunity for minorities. It could be lively if Senators were capable of asking questions with real substance.
Through the Same Eyes: Chapter 80: --I sat looking at the steering wheel for minutes. I really don’t know how long I sat there after Kent left. He leaned warmly against me as he gave me a high five. I hate high fives and I know he does too. He was acting again for Marie. A charade. Were my tears a charade too? No, this time they were real. I am confused. I wanted to go home with him. I wanted to jump into that bed and make love even better than it has been these past two months. But, for the first time I had thoughts about my deceptions. I thought about Paul. I felt the love of the kids. I knew also that I had an ulterior motive. I had to manipulate Kent to stay close to him. At first I thought Kent was doing the same to me. But, there was something real about him. His caring seemed real. His concern about my reputation seemed earnest. His desire to be with me seemed overwhelming. Yet he was measured. Looking for something. Guarding something. What? My cell phone rang. It was Paul.
“Why, Hi Paul”, I said cheerily. How easy it is for me to switch emotions. ‘Do you miss me?”
“I always miss you”, he answered pleasantly. And it made me feel good inside. Stronger. Needed. What’s wrong with me.
“Me too,” I muttered softly. Too softly?
“How’d you like to have a cup of coffee with me out here at BiEm. I have some interesting new stuff about Bromsky and his niece.
Something real for a change I thought, and I smiled inwardly. “Of course Paul. I don’t even need an excuse to have a cup of coffee with you during the day.” He agreed totally with me. I have no morals I thought. I hung up and started the car. I backed out and started home to clean up before going to meet Paul. I didn’t notice the Ford Focus as I left Maries parking area.
I don’t know about you, but with the spate of daytime retail establishment robberies, I always look around at other people when entering a convenience store. Actually the thieves are behind the counter charging $1.84 for a 20oz. soda pop.
I fear we will live in uncertain economic times up til the November elections. The Dems will send out favorable recovery reports and the GOP will counter with doubtful recovery reports. The traders will make bundles off the confusion and the average guy who really needs it will flounder. Just be prepared to be cautious. These are the days when it is possible to twitter an economy.
The Answer: The characters on the Pacific Princess were Captain Merrill Stubing (Gavin McCleod), Julie McCoy (Lauren Tewes), Adam Bricker (Bernie Kopell)< Burl “Gopher” Smith (Fred Gundy), Isaac Washington (Ted Lange), Vicki Stubing (Jill Whelan), Ashley “Ace” Covington Evans (Ted McGinley) and Emily Heywood (Marion Ross). Bonus Q: What did Ashley “Ace” Covington Evans do on the boat?
The Big Finish:
The Supreme Court is one of America’s greatest safeguards. You would hope it was always sound and sensible in the face of the loonies in Congress and consumate politicians in White House . But in the wake of all too many 5-4 decisions, I fear that this august body is just another group of politicians. And Kagan appears to be the most ostensible Pol of them all.
Of course, the real issue is how will the Red Sox continue to be competitive with all of the injuries and a line up of aging journeyman and untested rookies?
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