I’ve got that Master’s feelin’.

Today's Tids Issue 3,4466

Opening Stuff:

Do you know how great it feels when your intensely wound body finally finds relief? How the binds loosen and the body oozes out of the apprehension, bringing you down from stressful trepidation, off a precipice, finally to an entirely contented languishing blob; giddy disbelief and utter satisfaction. That’s exactly how I felt this morning about the Villanova win last night. What a great basketball game. I could barely watch it.

The election is getting  serious now, and the Trumspter is learning fast that getting away with inane, sophomoric comments will no longer play in Peoria. In fact his national poll lead has dipped for the first time since he hit the top. It is unlikely that Trump could surprise Cruz in Wisconsin, but if he toughed it through tonight, it could be over. But, it is unlikely that this time the Teflon mouth can overcome his new, more annoying negatives. What will be interesting though, is watching how Trump adjusts. He has too much invested not to. Bernie on then other hand just keeps on making gain after gain, keeping the supposed inevitable Dem candidate looking over her shoulder instead of forward. It is hard to imagine that Bernie can make the establishment abandon their girl, but I’m guessing some may be wishing they weren’t so beholden to the Clinton machine. And, last month Sanders raised $44 Million.

Was there a more disgusting, inhumane event reported over the weekend that the rape of a nine year old girl by four seedy looking men while mom smoked meth? This wasn’t in an ISIS territory, but in Utah, USA. We have too much of this type of brutal inhumanity in the country, that reminds me of lands across the sea, or river.

The Question:

What American writer in 1895 lost a criminal libel case against England’s Marquis of Queensbury who had accused the writer of homosexual practices? Bonus: Who was Max Gail?

The Headlines:

--Stocks Down In Triple Digit Land; Seem To be Following Global Sell-Off; Fewer Jobs, But Hiring Picking Up.

--Kris Jenkins Cements Great Villanova Team Victory With 3 Point Shot Buzzer Beater.

--Ford To Build Small Car Factory In Mexico.

--Indiana Teen Picked Villanova And Only Had 3 Wrong Picks In her Bracket

--Islamic Group Says They Will Continue To Target Christians; (Obama Says They Will Kill Muslims Too).

--March To GOP Contested Convention Could Begin With Cruz Wisconsin Victory; Bernie Slightly Ahead Of The Hill In Wisconsin Race That Could Also Propel Bernie To Victory In NY,

--Tourist Helicopter Crash In Popular Tennessee Mountain Area Kills 5.

US Think Tank At Johns Hopkins University Reports Suspicious Activity At North Korea Nuke Site

Three great UConn women’s basketball seniors, Brianna Stewart, Moriah Jefferson, Morgan Tuck, go after an unprecedented fourth straight title. They deserve it. Just think if everybody worked to be as perfect as the women of UGonn. Could be quite an amazing place.

Americans can rejoice after learning that only one of their countrypersons were on the list of the Panama Papers tax haven clients – author Marrianna Olszewski. The main reason why the US has so few is because we are not yet a Bernie Sanders country with oppressive taxes to support giant give-away programs. The big hitters from countries across Europe and Asia are there because high taxes supporting socialist governments force high earners to seek relief to preserve the benefits of their hard work. In the USA high earners receive tax benefits for all of the big contributions they make personally and through their charitable foundations. Obama and Sanders want us to be like that rest of the world forces high earners off shore. Why would a leader of a country that does it better than the rest of the world want to lower the bar so dramatically in order to become ordinary.

It’s hard to believe that in about 3 or 4 years we will be seeing nostalgia videos about the 1980’s.

The phrase that really gets me now is “Mid Century Modern”, a term used to describe much of the 1950’s housing by new young house hunters That post war period may have been the least exceptional era of home building architecture of last century and a half. Basically, you can romance anything.

I had the opportunity to have an extended talk with a young Hertz employee earlier this morning. It started with our exclamations over the Villanova win. The amazing part of the conversation was that we two from generations 40 to 59 years apart agreed 100% on the putiry of basketball and the damming effects of one and done college basketball programs; programs that water down both college play and NBA excellence. We may disagree on music, but when it comes to the important stuff we are marching in lockstep.

I have to say that I’m not seeing as many dramatic moments on the Voice as I remember having felt in the past. Maybe it’s because there is just too much of it and it is beginning to wear thin. Or, maybe the new music has a sameness to it that lulls my brain asleep. Even as much as I enjoyed the ACM awards, there were only 3 or 4 out of the 20 or so acts that I truly enjoyed. So too much of anything can become pretty wearing over time.

On the whole, I don’t even listen to the college activist kids who basically just trash logic and common sense to create exaggerated hostility. BTW, how about that new rag-tag group that travels from political rally to political rally stomping on the American Flag. I hear they are being recruited as the warm-up act for the ISIS glovbal convention. That should work.

The TV show Blacklist had a chance of being good if it wasn’t so clichéd, hero driven and predictable.

When are they bringing back “24”?

I’ll be back with the Parking Lot tomorrow.

The Answer:

Oscar Wilde would have found it different in England today. Bonus: Max Gail was not on Beverly Hillbilly, but was very well known or is role as Stan “Wojo” Wojciehowicz on Barney Miller. Tis was one of the real funny shows.

It may not look like it, but, The Tids are coming back. Thanks for your love.

Stay within yourself; and never give up.

Today's Tids Issue 3,565

Opening Stuff:

Rejoice Republicans, you’re just having a bad hair day. You may feel frustrated, flummoxed, disappointed, bewildered, befuddled, mad and mad…hopeless. But, think deep inside and remember we who are Republicans or constitutional independents or Dems with hope are still a cuddly group of lovable humans who’s world is of smaller more local government, high personal standards, less spending and dependency ending is a foundation upon which all have prospered economically, morally and humanistically. We see the melting pot for what it was, a giant opportunity. We believe in honesty and legality. We have to forget our differences enflamed by the heated battle. Join together, stay calm, steady and stand positively against the opposition which is of all things a socialist, or but a fair to middling long time government employee who has never tasted the energy of competitive private America. Who is regarded even by her own as low on the trust-o-meter. And, we’re supposed to be worried. So smile and see the light beyond the doldrums. We will find a way. I feel good about this.

Is that a moan…or groan, Department:

“Will glass coffins be a success?” “Remains to be seen.”

In the real world, we get to have non-political, competitive two hours when Villanova takes on North Carolina for the NCAA prize. The baby blue Tar Heels against the deep blue Wildcats should be a war especially if the same great Villanova team that humbled the Sooners shows up. I think Coach Wright will have them focused, and they will have to be very sharp against the deep and talented Carolina team. I’m for Villanova 100%, and may even be too nervous to turn on the TV. But I’ll take lots of peaks. Ryan “Marchidiacono” will be the glue among the high flyers.

When in March I finished watching the Academy Awards I felt there was something very wrong with this country. Last night at the end of the Academy of Country Music awards I thought the country was a pretty damn great place.

The Question:

Alan Ladd, Robert Redford and Lwo DiCaprio all played the same movie role in different eras. What was it? Bonus: In which film was Rita Gam discovered. What was he most famous line? Speed Bonus: St. Joseph Missouri is known for two historic events. What are they?

The Headlines:

--Signs Are That Stocks Could Enjoy Positive Day; Oil Will Determine.

--Sanders Says Hillary Running Away From New York Debate; Will A Softer Trump Jeopardize His Core.

--US Seizes Huge Shipment Of Iranian Weapons Intended For Houti Rebels In Yemen.

--Leaked “Panama Papers”, Cache Of Massive Offshore Financial Data, Triggers Investigation Of dealings Of Powerful People; Putin Says It’s A Deliberate Attack On Him In Advance Of Russia Parliamentary Elections.

--Red Sox To Open In Cleveland With Wind, Snow And Cold.

--Alaska Airlines To Buy Virgin America For $2.8 Bil.

--Russia Pushing Out Oil At Highest Ever Levels In Post Soviet Era; Will tend To keep Oil Prices Low.

--Greece Deporting Migrants To Turkey.

--WS Analysts Floating 20,000 Year End Dow.

If you like sports…wait, no…if you have a heart and appreciate hard work, perseverance, determination, conviction and just plain guts, then you would have enjoyed yesterday’s PGA championship match which may have been one of the most satisfying victories of any I have watched in years. An unknown guy named Jim Herman won it, his first victory at the old age of 38 after 16 years of never giving up on a dream. He won by playing his game, by remaining cool under enormous pressure where a victory that was within in his grasp could change his life. All he had to was wait anxiously 50o yards away from the prize; look at and contemplate the water or other hazards that take his ball and erase his advantage. And wait and pace; figit with his glove, reshuffle his club, Everything could go wrong, and the 16 year wait would have to begin again for him tomorrow when he would have to fight again for a rare spot in a tournament.. But this time it didn’t. He did everything right like a true professional. And, he smiled; he smiled a lot, walking to the final green as fans arose and cheered; He smiled a lot, before and after sinking the winning putt. Then he said to the TV announcer. “I’m sorry for the tears. But I’m pretty happy.”

On “Sunday Morning”, Megyn Kelly told Charlie Rose that her Fox program is designed for women who drink chardonnay.” I guess I don’t have to watch anymore.

What do you think Alexander Graham Bell would think listening to advertising touting one phone’s camera capability over another, with merely a mention about talking on it.? “Mr. Watson – Come here - I want you,” -- for a selfie! In fact AGB’s biggest invention, according to himself, was something called a “Photophone” which  experimented with wireless transmission. Yikes!

I don’t know about you, but changing light bulbs in a cramped bathroom ceiling fan unit is my most hated task. Most of them (I have dealt with) are poorly designed and precarious to access.

There is nothing that stops the over the top emotional excitement of an NCAA basketball win faster than the cutting down of the nets ceremony.

The iconic, storied “Pony Express” was only in business for 18 months. Must have had a good PR person.

There is a rumor on the street that Donald Trump will air a special version of Celebrity Apprentice to pick his cabinet. Should get good ratings.

Carl Rove suggests dropping Trump, Cruz and Kasich and turning to a fresh face. I wonder which fresh face his big money donors have in mind?

My stomach turned over a bit Friday when I heard that Cal and New York had passed bills raising the min wage to $15/hr. That’s a fifty percent increase in labor costs. It’s also a dagger in the back of free enterprise. Have the socialist geniuses noticed that then reason the US lost manufacturing jobs was because of lower wages in foreign countries?  Have they reviewed the demise of the mighty textile industry in New England. Or the Steel Industry in Pittsburgh, Or The car industry in Detroit. Have they ever considered what an IP hone would cost if made in the USA – by people, not robots. Yes, a $15/hr wage will be good for the advancement of robots – “Press my bellybutton for extra caramel.”.

One thing that I can guarantee in RI is that The Coast Guard House will be washed away again by a big storm.

The story is that Jim Herman (Golfer above) during one of his lulls between PGA cards was working at a Trump resort. Donald came into the pro shop one day and said. What are you doing here folding shirts? Go out there and follow your dream.” Trump underwrote his costs or helped him find a sponsor..

When listening to Chris Stapleton sing Fire Away in a beautiful duet with his wife Morganne, It’s easy to see why he won CMA Best Entertainer, Newcomer and Male Singer… and Album of the year. When Little Big Town came up  for their best group award, band member Karen Fairchild said, “I’m glad Chris Stapleton wasn’t a group!” You could see a lot of admiration for Chris in the yes of all of the biggest stars. Over the years he has written over a thousand songs for them all. It was his turn to take the stage.

The Answer:

The three actors were all Jay Gatsby. As one critic says, maybe in the fourth version of the F Scott Fitzgerald story, they will get it right. Rita Gam was nominated for an Oscar in The Thief starring Ray Milland. She had no famous line. In fact none of the actors had any lines at all. Speed Bonus: St. Joseph Mizzou was the home of the Pony Express and a the death of Jess – Jesse James, that is. The PE went from St. J to SF Cal.

Be yourself, because you are the greatest.

Is the Republican campaign an April fool’s joke?

Today's Tids Issue 3,564

Opening Stuff:

Doncha love April. It seems like such a gentle month. It begins with fools and a few laughs. It transforms drab into blossoms and leaves. The song says we get showers, but I never think of it that way. I think of it as a little girl with curly hair in a frilly dress exploring, skipping and screaming with happiness; finding the signs of new life. Her eyes widening and smile broadening as more and more birds in array of colors perform acrobatic tricks while chirping cheerful tunes. April becomes a blissful place as it cleanses the drear of winter, and greens the hillsides. It is a playful innocent month that just presents life simply, and hugs everything it can. Enjoy being caressed by April.

I have to say that I like the nick name of the Patriots new defensive lineman Terrance Knighton – “Pot Roast”. I’ll just be watching the games and thinking of gravy. I love football.

The mention of the words Ice Cream must titillate hearts, because it sure gets a response. I guess every sane reader keeps a bountiful supply nearby in Seward’s Icebox! I have to say that “Coffee” was mentioned the most, with superlatives for Trader Joe’s Coffee Blast and Newport Creamery Coffee and Chips. There were a couple of specialties among the many including “Dolce de Leche” and Homemade Orange Pineapple from the Sweet Spot in Point Judith.  Of course my heart goes out to vanilla lovers, casue you just can’t  get anything better than that rich pure and simple flavor.

This just in. A Moscow News Agency reports of new kind of Middle East in a news release describing a meeting in Tel Aviv between Netanyahu, Assad and Putin. The Israel PM says that his country has learned how to survive many different ways over the years even dramatically changing environments like today’s. The US State Department says no comment.

The Question:

Which Presidents had the best sense of humor?

The Headlines:

-- US Stocks Surprisingly Up After Ugly Futures And Europe Stocks Getting Socked; Us Labor Force Shows New, Strong Growth.

--New York And Cal Pass $15 Min Wage Laws (This is not an April Fool’s joke).

--Tornadoes Destroy Homes In Tear Through South.

--Bill Clinton Advises Hillary To Find A Back Up Plan That Could Include Her Supporting Sanders; Ex Prez Is Nervous About Intensity of FBI Probe.

--Tesla Ready To Unveil Model 3; $35,000 Electric Car Has range of 246 Miles..

--Donald Trump Women’s Campaign Falters After He Pledges Support of Bill Cosby; “He’s A Friend Of Mine” Says Candidate.

--China Now World’s Number 1 Beer Market.

--Kim Kardashian Fires Mother Chris Jenner; Billionaire Reality Star Says, “I used To Be A Nice Person before She Led Me Astray; Kanye Asks For Divorce, Saying He Doesn’t Like  Nice People.

So, one day a waitress came up to President Calvin Coolidge in a restaurant and said, “I bet a friend that I could get more than two words out of you.” He looked up and said, “You lose.”

I see where Gold has had its biggest quarterly giant since 1986. Could this be a negative omen for the stock market? Or, just an opportunity to buy gold low?

In case you didn’t know it, China says that April Fools gags are “no laughing matter and very un-Chinese.” The day celebrated in the west, “Does not conform with our nation’s cultural traditions, nor does it conform with the core values of socialism.” So, be careful if you are considering playing a trick on Bernie.

Actually, I’m always on the edge of my chair wondering what my oldest daughter has planned for me. 

There’s a lot of nostalgia movies, but more and more they cover eras that I consider just yesterday.

Did you see where the Supreme Court is going to rule on a Freedom of Speech issue after several states have banned the use of the “F”, “S” and “C” words in comedy routines? If the ban is upheld, it could be a boon for comedy writers.

The Parking Lot: Chapter 52 continues…

“That should keep him busy for a while. Now let’s see what you and I can do about tying Howland in this mess.”

   As in Us” Jared questioned.

   She looked around, I didn’t see any other us in this room.”

   They laughed, which they seem to be doing more and more. I talked to the young Howland kid who was scavenging my burnt out home. We might be able to work with him. He seemed scared and also afraid of his father or somebody in that group. And there is Fred.”

   “Fred may have recovered a bit, and he owes us. He is our best bet for nosing around.”

    “My guess is that Fred has been working with the Howlands all of this time,” said Nancy.

    Makes sense.”

    Hey, I always make sense, she came over and feigned choking him. “If this team is going to work, you have to listen to me carefully. Understand?”
    Jared reached behind her head and pushed it down to his lips, They both buried themselves in the feeling. “I love falling in love with you,” she murmured.

     

Reading Between the Lines Movie Reviews:

--Everybody Wants Some is great little comedy with super classic rock soundtrack. It’s a trip into nostalgia, following a successful college baseball team that plays hard on and off the field. Critics and audiences love it.

--Another very good film, and one on my list is Eye In The Sky Starring Helen Mirren. It is a powerfully acted rather cerebral look at a wartime political thriller. Mirren is a commander of a top secret drone operation. They are ready to pounce when a 9 year old girl enters the kill zone. Thus begins the personal, moral, political global argument.

--Audiences lime God’s Not Dead2 better than the critics. It’s about a High School teacher fighting for the right to discuss Jesus in the classroom.

  

The Answer:

For me, it was always JFK. He was unrehearsed and had a natural way of being Funny. According to a Presidential Historian Anthony Bergen, Andrew Jackson was probably the biggest prankster, once having invited two notorious prostitutes to a town Christmas Ball. Coolidge was known as silent Cal, but may have said some of the most dry, sarcastic things ever. Regan was ”Unrehearsed” funny, but Clinton who tried to be funny was often too rehearsed. Obama has good timing according to Bergen, and can be funny. Bergen and several others also say that Abe Lincoln may have been the funniest of them all. Nixon could not tell a joke at all (Sock it to me). And George Washington didn’t have the time for jokes (And his wooden teeth looked bad when he smiled.) James Polk had no interest in smiling. But, it is Benjamin Harrison, described as the “human iceberg” by Teddy R, who was considered far and away the least humorous. “Hey Ben, hold still while I light this match in your shoe.”

Calvin Coolidge used to love taking naps in the White House. Every time he woke up he asked, “Is the country still hear.” That’s a question a lot of us are asking these days.

So, which of the above Tids and News items are real or April Fools jokes?