Love is the gift that keeps on giving.

 

Today's Tids Issue 5,321 

Sincerity is good: 

 

 

It is becoming abundantly clear 

That the spirit is in the air  

And the days of gaiety are near.  

Yet there seems to be no fear 

As we persist in a shopping obsession 

While seemingly amidst a recession, 

Hoping we’ll be able to cheer 

When bills come due next year! 

 

After all of these years of using a computer, I still find the machines quite user unfriendly. I get so-called helpful notices written in a language stranger than Sanskrit, and I sit stunned wondering what to do. Do I likc click on no or yes and the watch all my work regress?  

 

The markets are down because evrybody is worried about a recession next year. Huh. I thought we were already in a recession for the past 8 months. 

 

The Question: 

With what do you wash your hands on a pandemic Christmas? Bonus: Why is Santa nervous in chimneys? Extra Bonus: What do you call Santa's motorcycle? 

 

The Headlines: 

--Market Expected to Slide Again Today. 

--Russia Fires 40 Missile Barrage at Ukraine’s Grid; 37 Destroyed Before Reaching Targets. 

--Claudine Day Named Harvard’s First Black President. 

--265,000 Gallon Aquarium in Berlin Radisson Blu Hotel Bursts Sending 1500 Fish and Flooding into Lobby and Onto Streets.  

 

This is the weekend that RI gun owners have to turn in their high-capacity magazines. An official of the state said gleefully, “That will save a lot of lives.” Yeah, like the nut with ambitions to mass murder is going to send in his or her magazine. It’s still about the people.  

 

The NFL will have three games this Saturday on their own network which means I won’t be watching. The college lineup for Saturday is sans titillation, unless you’re a Red Sox fan yearning to see old Fenway as a gridiron featuring Louisville and Cincinnati. That actually is a once Ohio River battle.  

 

Is it just me, or does it seem there have been an epidemic of private small plane crashes lately? Or does it just look like that because TV news needs exciting film clips to juice up broadcasts, 

 

The experts are saying that the only way we can end inflation is by having a recession. So basically, the increase in interest rates is the best way to get to a recession.  

 

I think that Wall Street needs a good psychiatrist. 

 

A new news reporting trend seems to be having to read five to seven paragraphs before getting an answer to the promise of the headlines. Or find that the headline has more information than the entire story. It's all about grabbing you off the fast-moving web. 

 

The San Francisco Forty Niners look like a very smart team. “Smart” will win you a lot of close games. 

 

Prince Harry of Meghanville just looks like one pathetic individual to me. It really irritates me to see snippets of tis pair playing the victim role... basically to make millions. 

 

 

The Answer: 

You wash with a Santatizer. Bonus: Santa gets nervou in chimney because he has Claus-trophobia. Extra Bonus: Of course, he rides a Holly Davidson. 

 

 

Have a great weekend, E-v-e-r-y-b-o-d-y!!