It's a pooper scooper world.

Today's Tids Issue 2,178
Opening Stuff:

I think this is going to be one of those days where little things just keep on going wrong.

But then, I’ll just jump into one of my fantasies and ride it out until tomorrow. A fertile mind alleviates a lot of manufactured suffering.

I was thinking after I wrote that little item about how parents now-a-days in addition to teaching all of life’s lessons, must educate kids the fine art of pooper scooping! Which isn’t going to be that different from all of the crap the children are going to have to pay for after the current Congress and Admin gets finished spending.

The Question: Name ten Jewish comedians who gained fame in the hey day of the New York’s Catskills.

The Headlines:
--Small Oil Leakage Deemed Insignificant.
--Vatican Says Ordaining Woman Priests A Sin On A Par With Pedophilia.
--Dems To Vote Again On Jobless Benefits.
--Judiciary Committee To Vote On Kagan; Lead GOP Member Against.
--7 Midwest States Sue Feds Over Handling Of Asian Carp Infestation Of Great Lakes.
--Goldman Sachs Profit Down On Lower Revenue And SEC Fines.
--Unemployment Lower In 39 States.
--Home Construction Levels Sink Further.

Back to More Stuff:

I commented the other day about including a ban on woman priests in the same pronouncement condemning sexual abuse by priests. Well, those wizened wizards of the Vatican have cleared it up with a new memo that says “Ordaining woman priests is a sin equal to pedophilia! Are th ey nuts? I am one to give the Vatican the benefit of the doubt, but this is way beyond my understanding.

I have always had a problem with this Indian sovereignty thing. Maybe it’s because I live in such a small place where Indian lands are not some remote reservation. My problem is basically about separate sets of rules for peoples essentially living in the same country. Maybe it’s the word sovereignty. Self government is fine. But it must be subject to “inter- jurisdictional” rules. I was frankly amazed at the Iroquois passport issue. I sheds a lot of light on how this idea of sovereignty may be racing out of control. Being independent doesn’t mean you can work outside sensible laws.

One of the first clues that this day was not progressing well, was that I awoke with nary an idea for Tids in my head. Can’t you tell.

Some of the funny stuff from the Catskill crowd: “Someone stole all of my credit cards but I won’t report it. The thief spends less than my wife.”; “the doctor gave a man six months to live. The ma couldn’t pay his bill so the doctor gave hi another six months.”; The Harvard School of Medicine did a study of why Jewish women like Chinese food so much. The study revealed that this is due to the fact that Won Ton spelled backwards is not now!”

To learn how Obama may be affected by criticism, you have to watch his henchmen. He rarely flinches. Some may call it cool under pressure. I call it aloof.

The difference between the Vatican and Congress is that you can’t vote out the Vatican.

A lot of authors are really nice guys until their agents find ways to make money off them. Actually, most authors would like to continue to be nice guys, but their agents won’t let them.

Almost everybody would be a lot happier if they never tried to be something they’re not.

I’m envisioning an entire generation in 30 years walking behind Congress with giant plastic bags!

The Answer:
There were plenty…Shecky Greene, Red Buttons, Totie Fields, Joey Bishop, Milton Berle, Jan Murray, Danny Kaye, Henny Youngman, Buddy Hackett, Sid Caeser, Groucho Marx, Jackie Mason, Victor Borge, Woody Allen, Joan Rivers, Lenny Bruce, Peter Sellers, Carl Reiner, Shelly Berman, Gene Wilder, George Burns, Allan Sherman, Jerry Lewis, George Jessel, Alan King, Mel Brooks, Phil Silvers, Jack Carter, Rodney Dangerfield, Don Rickles and the incomparable Jack Benny. And those are just the big names.

Is it the End:
A book on 0-Man's summer reading list is "The Post-American World", written by Fareed Zakaria,

I think I’ll go outside and stand in the summer rain.