My tie colors clash with my Cheeto orange stained fingers.

Today's Tids Issue 3,503 

Opening Stuff:

Through cooling skies, the sunset emits an orange glow across a soothing winterscape. Purple hills run down to meet black frigid seas. Soft colors grasp for the remaining day’s light before the fiery orb dies in the horizon far. I stand alone upon a jutting rock, sparkling ocean spray breaking below; now feeling the breeze grow colder at my back, yet enjoying the consuming warmth in my heart from the image of a master’s painting that will never fade.

I’m not a fashion mogul by any sense of the word, but last night I saw a lot of expensive, pretty ordinary looking dresses on GG actresses. Some dresses, to me, looked home made. Really. Is there anything less meaningful in our world than the Red Carpets at these narcissistic events? And Hollywood doesn’t like, Trump?

There are artists in every profession. Some people just paint better.

I’m happy to see that plaid is now considered a new fashion and décor trend. Personally, I have never stopped liking plaid. In fact, one of the reasons I don’t like going to Florida is because I can’t wear my plaid flannel shirts.

One point three Billion! I could run for President.

The Question:

Name five styles of traditional plaids. Bonus: Name five celebrities who played college football. Double Bonus: Sadly, David Bowie died last night after battling cancer for a year and a half. David Bowie was not his real name. Why did he change it?

The Headlines:

--US Stocks May Do Better Today Even As China Falls Again; Bulls Still Fighting; Oppenheimer Slashes Apple Target from 155 to 120, On Disappointing IPhone Future; Other Analysts Remain Bullish On Apple Even As They Reduce Targets..

--Supreme Court To Hear Arguments That Challenge Right of Public Employee Unions To Demand Fees From Teachers, Fire fighters, Police and Other Gov Workers Who Decline To Join.

--Philadelphia Police Shooter May Be Just One Of Many In Broad Group Going After Law Enforcement.

--New Report Says That Refugee Sex Attacks In Cologne Germany Top 200.

--Home Teams Lose In All Four Wild Card NFL Games; Next Week: Denver-Pitt, Pats-KC, Carolina-Seattle and Arizona-GB.

--Prez Will Close Gitmo Before He Leaves Office, According To Staffers.

--Revenant, Martian, Mozart In the Jungle, Wolf Hall Among Big GG Winners; Damon, DeCaprio, Stallone, Lawrence, Larson Key Individual Winners.

--Wall Street Wants NFC Super Bowl Winner To Keep Market Up.

I was driving up the road towards Boston when in Fall River I saw the future with the beginnings of the construction of a new Amazon distribution center which looked like a small continent. The car radio was telling me that in-store retail sales were actually pretty crappy this year, and that we can expect giants like Macy’s to close stores and lop off employees as the On-line buying continues to grow (15-23% next year). The good news is that advances in Internet buying could put an end to developers gobbling up beautiful green fields for mega shopping plazas we don’t need. Of course, that would put construction people out of work. Are you beginning to get a picture of what technology hath wrought? Also confusing the picture is the high rate of returned goods from on-line purchases. It’s about 1/3 of all products purchased, mainly because of the inability to see true colors and feel the fabrics. (I say buy traditional plaid you know). This is a pretty big problem when you consider shipping, often free for competitive reasons. Regardless of these current glitches in cyberland, retail stores will continue to close because on-line purchasing is becoming commonplace. Maybe we can put Middle East refugees in closed malls. H&G could develop mall rehab reality shows – the Property Brothers redo JC Penny.

Ricky Gervais makes me laugh. But after he left his opening monologue, it was like I was back in the basement with my kids putting on little skits they made up when they 8 to 12 years old. How terrible was Jennifer Lawrence and Amy Schumer trying to be funny, or Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum in the opening minutes after Gervais. Good thing they are serving a lot of Champagne to get the laughs.

Did you read that Afghanistan is paying salaries to soldiers who don’t exist, with the money going to officials with connections? It sounds like Dem voting in Chicago.

While Americans are going to the newly opened Cuban beaches; the government in charge is luring officials from China, Iran, Russia and NK with the Missile they somehow stole from the USA. Nothing like an open and free Cuber.

There is a big scandal getting bigger down here, and it is conceivable it could have ramifications around the country. The St. George School, a prestigious Episcopal private school that sits upon a magnificent hilltop overlooking the ocean and uninhabited lands afar, is in the early stages of a sexual scandal that is growing remarkably similarly to the priest situation as redefined in the new movie, Spotlight. This one started with a very small item in the paper about a women coming forward bout being molested by an athletic department employee in the 1980’s. It was quickly dismissed in the article as a thing of the past where the abuser, since dead, was fired immediately. Of course sexual abuse cases should be reported to authorities. Within a few weeks the list of the abused mushroomed to 40, and now there is a full fledged, very serious investigation. It isn’t hard to believe that somewhere out there in schools in many states, other students have felt the shame and will come forward, just like they did in the Catholic Church once the Boston story broke. I’m wondering if the movie was the motivator here.

Unfortunately in the many small societies like churches, school and colleges, the population there generally reflects the demographic behavior of the population at large. That’s just the way numbers work.

One of the things I work to avoid when writing is the overuse of the word “then”. If you can replace “then” with a little thoughtful, creative phraseology, your prose well always flow little better.

Why do I get this feeling that if Hillary becomes president we’re going to get a lot of whining if things don’t go her way? Maybe it’s because that’s what she was doing on Face the Nation yesterday morning.

Jordan Spieth proved pretty conclusively yesterday in Hawaii, that he is the real thing, and will be winning tournaments for a long time. But, as the official golf season opens, I expect some other hot new comers to start their rise to the top. It is just the way it is today.

I see where a Hawaiian Congressman is proposing that the august members wear flowered and gaily colored shirts loosely, unbelted on Fridays. May be we do need something to shake them up down there in their marble temple. They could wear clown suits for the other four days! Did I say “Gaily”? Can you ay that anymore? Donald Trump is making me feel daring again.

Now that the rush is over and regular people with brains are going to see what this Star Wars thing is all about, the general opinion not colored by publicists is that it is pretty average, and that Carrie Fisher sleepwalks through the entire production. This is also how we elect average ineffectual presidents – smothering the thought process with hoopla.

Was Channiing Tatum named after Tatum O’Neal, or vice versa?

You have to wonder if “The Good Wife” will have to give equal time to Repub candidates under the “Equal Time” Rule.

The latest “Hillary Effect” in Hollywood seems to be remaking old movies with women replacing men in the lead roles.

The Parking Lot: Chapter 40.

    Fred was sitting in a cold dark basement. They hadn’t hurt him, but they knew he was severely compromised by their intimidation, threat of death. They could easily see that beneath his bravado there was an avowed, lifelong coward. They probably felt he would easily sell out his friends for a good offer. He would consider not dying a very good opening bid on their part..

   Yet, this Nancy was getting to him. There was something special about her – resolve, creativity and courage all wrapped up in a beautiful package with a great wit. If her family of yore was anything like she is today, he could understand how her ancesters may have accumulated so much land.

   Then he said to himself, “But Fred, you are such a sleezeball that you are probably thinking more about the land you might get than Nancy herself, and her friends. Nah, he argued with himself, you’re changing. You’ve seen the error of your ways.” He started laughing as he realized how weird he was sounding. Then he stopped abruptly, felt his body clench, when the heavy metal clang of a latch opening a heavy steel door stirred him back to his current position of hopelessness.

   The door opened and he saw the glint off the blade of a large cleaver like knife as one of the goons entered ahead of Rackovic. He clenched his hands balling them in to fingerless fists and shoved them into his pocket, thinking, Nancy isn’t that good.

The Answer:

The most familiar plaid is Tartan which includes many other Scotch types like Black Watch and Royal Stewart. Others most popular for clothing designers are Tattersall, Windowpane Check, Madras, Gingham and Glen Plaid. Bonus: Mr. T, Mark Harmon (Pretty good QB at UCLA), Phil Robinson (Louisiana), Brian Denehey (Columbia), Nick Nolte, Carl Weathers, Mathew Fox, %#&@ *&%$##, Dean Cain, John Goodman, Dr. Phil, Tommy Lee Jones (First team All-Ivy at Harvard), John Wayne, Ed O’Neil, Burt Reynolds, Ronald Reagan, Gerry Ford and Dwayne Johnson ( Note: One of Dr. Phil’s North Texas teams lost 100-6. His teammates were happy to have a budding psychoanalyst to console them) Double Bonus: David Bowie was born Davy Jones, and at the time he was getting going in the music business, there was a popular musical group called The Monkeys featuring Davy Jones. He didn’t want the confusion.

(%#&@ *&%$## = Bill Cosby)

Wishing David a good journey:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYYRH4apXDo

292,200,000 to 1. Sounds perfect.

Today's Tids Issue 3,502

Opening Stuff:

Well, I made my contribution to the state lottery commission today. My retirement investment adviser said I shouldn’t count on the $700 million quite yet. And that after I have already spent $400 Mil. Life can be tough.

People seem to be losing their individuality. It doesn’t change whether you are rich or poor or intelligent or not so. There is intellectual commonality that is equally as mindless as some traits ascribed by them to the unchosen. The rich look down at the hoards flocking together as they all gather to try out do each other with latest over priced fad. Be yourself, it’s the best thing you have. I mean, one of the best things you have. Sorry dear,

If you’re looking for another reason to keep Hillary out of the Oval Office, consider that Obama appointed two super libs, the very youthful Kagen (55) and Sotomayor (61) to the Supreme Court. It is inevitable that a couple of openings would occur during a Hillary tenure, namely Kennedy and Scalia. If you look at the choices that she recommended to her hubby in the 90’s -- Zoe Baird, Kimba Wood, Lani Guinier -- it is time to really worry who she might dredge up in her own term. That is downright scary. Maybe she’ll name herself for the duel position. Superwoman lives.

The Question:

Name five common things you may have around the house that would be more valuable than you think.

The Headlines:

--Market In Positive Territory At Opening After Pretty Strong Employment Report; Gains Peeled Away During Morning; Gets Positive In The Noon Hour; China Calm.

--Jeb Promotes State Run Food Stamp Program That Would Have Work Requirements.

--Prez On Sales Promotion Tour Selling Gun initiative; Majority Of US Thinks It Is Good, But Far Less Think It Has A Chance Of Working; Disregarding Congress Is The More Serious Issue; American Sniper Kyle’s Widow Confronts Him At Town meeting..

--US Hellfire Missile Winds Up In Cuba; Military Worried That Technology Will Go To China, Russia Or NK.

--Philadelphia Policeman Shot In Ambush; Boston Police Officer Shot Midmorning In Dorchester Neighborhood..

One of the hardest things I have to write in the Tids thing is announcements about sports people, politicians and other notable celebrity deaths. The media typically in their memorializing turns them all into generational icons. Now, I don’t like to come across as a cold ogre, but sometimes I have to be honest, like this morning where I must say I didn’t particularly like Pat Harrington Junior who died yesterday. Actually I found him to be annoying. Of course I’m sad he died, but that’s what happens to people. It doesn’t change who they were.

Best Weekend in Football, Department

Ok, it’s NFL playoff time so let’s get started on the picks. My guess is that the popular favorites are Seattle over Minnesota, Green Bay over Washington, Kansas City over Houston and Pittsburgh over Cincinnati. Minnesota is going to be really, really cold and that may give an edge to the Vikings, who in Peterson have a strong runner who can match Marshall. Small edge to Minn. People like to laugh at the skins, because they don’t like their owner, but Cousins is playing very efficiently, and GB’s O-Line is porous. Washington could surprise. KC’s Alex Smith is another solid QB like Cousins, and he has the players around him to take the Chiefs – now playing as well as anybody – to the next round. Cinncy is probably a better all around team than Pitt, but Rothlisberger is tough I  tough games. But, wait, he and the Steelers didn’t show up for the game where they could have clinched. I’m liking the Bengals.  (Note: Pats fans want the Steelers to win to go on to Denver and beat the Broncs, thus giving Home field advantage to the Pats in the AFC championship game.)

And then on Monday night, there’s the NCAA championship game between Alabama and Clemson, which should be great. Both teams looked great in the play-in round. Sadly I have to pick Alabama, but I’ll be rooting or Clemson, again.

In a new list of the best buffets in each state, The Nordic Lodge in RI is the most expensive at $93 per person. But it includes all you can eat Lobster, Filet Mignon and plenty of other stuff including mouthwatering desserts. It sounds very up town, but it is deep in the woods in the boonies, and some people have had trouble finding their way out. Check out your state:   https://www.yahoo.com/travel/all-you-can-eat-the-1337861390590006.html

Yesterday was a perfect day for golf, clear, dry, about 45-47 degrees and no wind. There was just one thing amiss – getting the tees into the frozen ground. On the other hand, you got a lot of extra millage on drives as the ball hit the concrete like fairway and rolled and rolled until it hit a snow bank.

It was nice to see a US Government official with a sense of humor. After announcing the new food guidelines, some of which contradict previous food guidelines, the official said, “Most people don’t pay attention and eat what they want anyhow.” All you have to do is wait five years for the next report when we will probably see some of our favorites now banned back on the good eating list. It’s all a big game. Something for another bloated US agency to do, and a way to spend their budgets

Also on the nutrition front are vitamins which more an more professionals are saying that the USA is spending far too much on additives that generally only give you what you are already receiving from a balanced diet. There exceptions though, and vitamin oddities. For instance Alcoholic vegetarians are in dire need of Vitamin B-12. Calcium for bone strength is found in many foods and not just the obvious like dairy products. Unfortunately, if you want veggies to give you the calcium from one cup of milk, you need 5 cups of broccoli. Hope there is plenty of creamy chicken gravy handy. If you live in the south, you don’t need vitamin D at all. The sun is the best source of that essential ingredient that also strengthens bones, muscles  -- including the heart muscle. The supplement business is huge, and most of it is bought by people infatuated with it but who don’t need it at all.

I’ve been writing so many of these Tids, some days I look up expecting to see a notice saying that I have run out of paper.

I haven’t heard the 0-Man drawing a ”Red” Line in the North Korean tundra, have you? In fact I haven’t seen any concern at all. I guess he hasn’t figured out how it would help him politically.

Reading Between the Lines Movie Reviews:

--The highly touted Revenant must be better than the trailers. According to some sources it is favored to pick up several Statues at the Golden Globe awards, mainly for Leonardo and the director who’s name I can’t spell. It is the true story of legendary explorer Hugh Glass and his almost unbelievable battle for survival. Moments of severe beauty are interrupted by vicious reality including, as you probably have seen ad nausium, a battle with a bear.

--The not so hot Anesthesia (A terrible name for a movie that may have you nodding off). Get this: A philosophy professor is stabbed while buying flowers for is wife. All the while, his daughter-in-law battles cancer, a student has self harm issues, a junkie is dragged to rehab by a friend and a suburban housewife wants to get to the action in the city. I don’t know what to make of it. 5, 4, 3, 2…Zonk!

The Answer:

Spring cleaning can be dangerous as there is a good chance in this new world of collectibles that you could throw out a gem worth decent money. Five possibilities are: Pyrex Dishes from the 50’s with floral designs have gone for $3-400 at auctions; VHS Tapes where an 80’s horror movie went for $800 on eBay ( A lot of value also lies in the box cover art); Roald Dahl memorabilia – His signed first edition “James and the Giant Peach” went for 7,500 pounds in a London auction; Comic books like Action Comics 31 which introduced Superman and then there was Detective Comics 327 which sold for $1.1Mill; Classic American 70’s muscle cars like the Chevy Chavelle. I wonder what my old collection of marbles would bring.

You hear a lot about politicians and bureaucrats trying to improve education. I’d like to see a little more excitement in the students. Maybe the stimulating Academic festival Overture will help! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1E6FBi-AJw

Have arousing weekend, E-v-e-r-y-b-o-d-y!

The sun is shining, so stop the whining.

Today's Tids Issue 3,501

Opening Stuff:

(Note: If you get a weird message from me, say like a subject that may seem generic like “Salutations” and a content that only shows a link, do not open! My email has been compromised – Which is something Politicians are unable achieve! Of course many of you may think the Tids are weird.)

That’s not the way I like to start the Morning Mess, but after looking at the stock futures, that appears to be the least of my concerns. Yikes. I’m just hoping its a traders got to trade to make money thing, and it can’t go up much until it goes down. The market has been essentially hovering for almost a year now, and it could be that’s the peak which current global and US economies can generate.

I’m beginning to sense a ground swell for Trump. Solid thinking people who were once quite amazed that he was doing so well and couldn’t figure it out, are now firmly in his column thinking that anything other the traditional politicians is a big step forward. In addition, some of the big media experts, campaign operatives and pollsters are seeing him now as a cant miss winner of the nomination. Iowa may be a downer for him, but Iowa has been out of context with the norm considering that the past two Repub winners there have been Huck and Santorum.

I’ve always had an enormous amount of admiration for Ken Griffey Jr. when he played. Some people just rise above, and you could see that in this new Hall of famer with a record breaking vote percentage.

The Question:

Name ten of the regulars who gathered around Cheers bar. Extra points if you can name 5 of the actors.

The Headlines:

--China Exchange Stoppage And Oil Record Low Price Expected to Pound US Stocks Again Today. Futures at -333.

--Jobless Claims End Year At Lowest Level Since 1973.

--George Soros Calls Ugly Market A Crisis.

--Congress Sends ObamaCare Repeal Bill To President’s Desk; Faces Certain Doom, But War Is Ignited; Repubs Offer Solution Blunting 0-Man Negative.

--Libya Truck Bomb Kills 60 Policemen, Injures 300.

--No Winner In Powerball; Like Will be Well Above $700 Million For next Drawing.—January Layoff Announcements Mounting Up As Business Looks Forward To More Sluggishness In Economy.

--Joe Biden Having Second Thoughts About Not Entering 2016 Campaign.

--Alabama Top Justice Tells Judges Not To Issue Gay Marriage Licenses.

Somebody said to me recently that, “sitting is the new smoking”! Shoot me. Does that mean the government is going to sue couch makers and bring a judgment to change the name “Lazy Boy”. And yesterday I read that Kale was the King, the Pontiff of produce!

It is easy to wallow in hopelessness until you force yourself to crawl out and realize how easy it is to something about anything.

A guy named Walter Cavanaugh, AKA “Mr. Plastic Fantastic, has 1,497 credit cards giving him a line of credit of about $1,700,000. He says he’s responsible and uses them wisely within his means. $1.7 mil could be a very tempting danger to many.

Best headline of the day: “The Great Fall of China.”

Yesterday I gave you two current wall street slogans, “Go to cash to avoid the crash” and “Keep calm and carry on.” But after this morning I’m thinking. “When stocks don’t fly, curl up and die.” That’s a bit dire.

By the way, there’s a local beauty parlor called, “Curl up and dye.”

Apparently a bake shop in NYC sells really fancy donuts for $100/per. People buy them by the dozen. Is it me or is there just too much money around with nothing to do?

Big apple denizen’s unrealistic views on value is why RI’ers trying to sell tier homes look for New York license plates coming in the driveway. “I love New York, unless I can get a better deal in RI.”

There’s some scuttlebutt rising up in the woman’s magazines that modesty may be back in vogue in women’s clothes. And also among psychologists, that the 70’s free love concept maybe wearing thin, especially for people looking for more in life. Culture has always been a pendulum.

The Parking Lot: Chapter 39 continues.

   Jared was roused awake form his comfortable slumber on the living room couch by the noise of activity in the kitchen. He ran to the bathroom first, got relief, and then after cleaning himself up felt he could present himself to Nancy. There she was, deep inside her computer. He was already hours behind her.

   She looked up and smiled, then reached back with a dangling arm that said hold my hand. Jared obliged happily, “What has your juices going this morning?” he asked.

   “Everything, including you,” she said softly through her eyes. I like quiet, so I got up early to get something done.” They both turned their heads to the wooden table where her phone was vibrating against the surface. Our friends, she said casually, but you could see the tension as she rose, walking over. Jared went to the coffee maker, keeping his ears attuned.

   Nancy turned on the speaker, “Nancy, Nancy, are you there, this is Fred.”

  “Yeah, I‘m here, Fred.”

   ”Both of them stood in silence listening to their semi ally struggle with his words. “You got to listen to these guys…” The voice was interrupted by one much gruffer. “You got one f---ing day to show up, or we start sending body parts to your post office box. They both heard a loud gasp just before the sound of “click”.

   Nance turned, her face very serious. “The good news is that we have a day. That’s all we need.” But, Jared could see she was scared for Fred.

The Answer:

Personally, on of the first of the funniest for me was Shelly Long playing Diane Chambers. Others: Sam Malone, Carka Tortelli, Cliff Clavin, Norm Peterson, Dr. Frazier Crane, Woody Boyd, Rebecca Howe, Dr. Lilith Sternin, Al and Ernie “Coach” Pantusso…who were played by Ted Danson, Rhea Perlman, john Ratzenberger, George Wendt, Kelsey Grammer, Woody Harrelson, Kristie Alley, Bebe neuwirth, Al Rosen and Nicholas Colasanto. I’m still laughing…except at Woody.

Let’s hope that today comes around a little. Even the markets are creeping back form opening highs. Stay cool.