Today's Tids Issue 3,398
Opening Stuff:
The
next time you see a bowl of Cheeto’s stand up and salute.
You see, that dusty cheesy stuff was a significant
contributor to the wellbeing of our brave soldiers during WWII. To reduce
weight of supplies and provide our soldiers with tangy, protein-rich cheese
during the monumental conflict, the US military invented “Full fat, Dehydrated
Cheese”. When the war ended, the dehydrators scampered until they found corn
chip manufacturers in need of a delightful taste. Wear your orange fingers with
pride.
Trump
bumper sticker: “Trump 2016. There will be hell Toupee”
The
big question is about the stock market. China is behaving badly,
and the rest of the world is being sent to sit in the corner. I often say that August
woes are typically not significant as an evaluation of the true economy. But,
in the past we have never had China to reckon with. Usually around now I would say,
let’s just take a deep breath and worry about September, when professional, earnest
trading begins again. But, as I sit on my rickshaw spilling fried rice from my
chopsticks, I’m thinking, this is not what yesterday was. It is a time to be
cautious.
The
Question:
In what year did the first “PC” appear, and who
made it? No Donald, that’s not Political Correctness, it’s a computer. Albeit,
a Terrific computer.
The
Headlines:
--Stocks Bouncing back After Worst day Of 2015; Damaged
Apple Helping To Lead The Way; China Worries Has Traders Unloading Financial
And Telecommunication Stocks; China bank Pledges To Let market Forces Determine
Value of uan..
--USA Runs $149 Billion Budget Deficit In July.
--European Stocks Suffer Worst day Of 2015.
--Yazidi Christian Refugees Flee Isis; USA Gives
Them The Cold Shoulder.
Massive Explosion Rocks China City; Hundreds
Hospitalized.
--Mounting College Sexual Assault Investigations
Putting Stress On Law Agencies
The
first orange colored snack that grabbed me by the back of
the neck and drove me to addiction was called Chee Wees. Just in case you are
interested.
I’m
happy with the Red Sox now that they are playing the
outfield they should have played all year long -- Betts, Bradley and Castillo.
From what I have read, Jackie Bradley’s defense is loved and respected by
pitchers. His hitting is coming on too. In a year or two, I can see us loving the
Killer B’s of Boston – Betts, Bradley and Bougartz. And Brock. Sorry, rest of
the baseball world – some days I just have to talk about my team, even when
they are sucking on the field. Being a baseball fan is all about hope, It
builds character..
Why
did the cow go to the marijuana field?
It was the pot calling the cattle back! Shoot me. I’d gladly take a bullet for the
wonderful punster who sent this, so that Puns live on in The Tids.
America’s
Got Talent opened at Radio City Music Hall last night,
and there were a couple of very entertaining acts. Among my favorites were country
singer Benton Blounut, very pleasant and talented ventriloquist Paul Zerdan, power
singer Samantha Johnson, and a very mature and talented Mexican 13 Year old singer,
Alondra Santos. Also captivating was Stro-A, which was one of those very
creative dance groups that uses lighting and electronics to mesmerize. I also could
watch acrobatic dancers Craig and Micheline again. Vita The contortionist was
certainly good, but boring. Piff the Magic Dragon was, I think, suppose to be a
comedic magician. Last night he was neither. The Gentlemen, a 10 and 13 yo. brother
dance team were quite amazing, but their act though well done looks the same
all of the time. Triple Threat might have been good but the song choice was
bad, and they were at best underwhelming. Shuddering comedian Drew Lindsey, though
inspiring, was tedious and not terribly funny. The four gymnasts, Show Porject,
were good at what they do, but certainly not anything I’d pay to see. So the
beginning of the end is upon us. Stay tuned, but mute the judges.
Trivialization
of America Department:
The USA has sunk pretty low with their adulation of
everything Kardashian…and beyond. So I wouldn’t be surprised if the nest big
reality trend will be live operations in Hospitals, which are clamoring for
business. after all, this is anything-is-possible America.
BTW,
did you see that clip showing a newscaster walking off the set screaming, “No
more, no more”, just after his co-anchor started, “And now the latest update on
the Kardashians.” God help us. He could be Time Man of the year, as far as I’m
concerned.
People
used to hate door to door salesmen as personified by
The Fuller Brush Man and emulated by the Kirby vacuum cleaner people and several
insurance salesmen. But now, people welcome these intruders into their lives
through the internet and social media.
The
Parking Lot, Chapter 9 continues..
Nancy felt
her heart pumping and it wasn’t because she was paddling her canoe hard from
her home landing, across the lake to a small island, also part of the Joaquim
heritage. She could paddle with ease, as her muscular athleticism helped drive
the paddle deep into the cool waters, pushing the light craft forward at a fast
steady speed. She didn’t want to be out in the open long. She loved the thrill
of aching muscles.
It was her
mind that was expending all of the energy, that had her juices flowing, igniting
her instincts. She had become excited about taking control. And her brain was actively
sending ideas for consideration and rejection. She was going to become the
hunter.
Over the
past month since the city boys had come to her small town with big plans, she
had been carefully plotting a strategy to undermine their presumed entitlement
to smother the place in consumerism. Growth was not a good word around here.
Ever
since that night when she stopped at the local Newport bar below the parking
lot, her control and her plans began unraveling. First, she decided to have another
beer after her coffee house waitress friend Amanda left to get home for a
little sleep before her early morning job. Her second mistake was returning the
look from a large stranger at end of the bar. Maybe it was all of the anger building
over the development proposals, which she considered an attack on her neighbors
and past. She found herself liking the idea of a little tension release. The
big, good looking guy was beginning to
look like a gift from the gods, as she ordered another beer. Before she
could finish ordering, a beer arrived with a strong hand attached to the glass.
Mistake number three: She left the bar with him.
The
Answer:
It was 1981, and IBM started the revolution that
brought affordable computers into homes. And now, IBM is trying to find out
what to be when they grow up. Technology eats it’s young.
Sorry
for
the lateness everybody. Love your evening!
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