The Janus Effect.

Today's Tids Issue 4,076

For smiling, deliriously happy women:

From millennials to octogenarians, from liberals to conservatives, from carnivores to herbivores, we have two faces looking the other way -- without periphery vision. That, perhaps over simplified, is The issue in the USA. It’s time for the only group to not have marched on Washington to group together, to rise up and ease the discourse – the Moderates!

The latest USA rage among thieves is Tubas! Say what? Will Oompa appropriation precede an Oprah nomination? You’ll know at the next Stephen Colbert solo Sousaphone concert.

You can always tell when the Trump admin has done something absolutely right by the intensity of the media scramble to find something negative about an event or law of action.

The Tid’s always has at its orange fingertips a loyal squad of savvy scouts for scrumptious snacks. One of our truly best has found it, and is the first to report on the next national taste trend…Cheetos Popcorn! That’s right, you heard correctly the magic word – C-h-e-e-t-o-s. Yes once again The Tids is ahead of the rest of the nation. They laughed at Christopher Columbus and were snickering when The Tids became preoccupied with the orange, finger messing snack. Stay ahead. Stay tuned to the Tids.

The Question:

Who are considered the Five Worst generals In US History?

The Headlines:

--Wall Street Could Bounce Back As President Appears To Have Softened Tariff Rhetoric; FED Beige Book Says New Tax Plan Is Boosting Average Wages; New Jobless benefits Claims Rise After Last Week’s All-Time Lo.

--Cigna To Buy Express Scripts For $67 billion.

--Small Banks Looking For Trump To Undo Damage Wrought By Obama.

--AG Sessions Hits Hard At Sanctuary Cities Flaunting US Law; Legal Experts Say Cities Are Vulnerable.

--Schumer Reveals Plan To Cut Trillion From Tax Cuts To Pay For Infrastructure.

--Woman’s March Leadership Under Fire For Continuing Ties To Louis Farrakhan.

Latest Nor’Easter Spares NE Coast; Inland Receives Up to 2 Feet Of Snow.

Some people love Brussel sprouts and other people love guns. And neither can understand the whims of the other. That’s just the way the world works. Get used to it.

How the media works, Department:

A headline yesterday said, “Secretary of Education Voss Visits Parkland School. The Sub Head said: “Some kids are not happy.” I would say that most kids had no significant reaction positive or negative to the visit by a Washington Big. But the media will always look for the handful of negative reactions, especially when this current admin might be doing something right..

Think of the billions spent on the scopes to look into deep space. Some will say it is just an expensive way for scientists to get data to finish a Phd thesis. Others will say it helps us find significant universe revelations, which will take a space trip of about twenty human generations to reach the findings for verification.

So, this bartender got used to a doctor coming in after work each day for a hazelnut daiquiri. One day he ran out of hazelnuts, and substituted hickory nuts. The physician arrived on time as usual and the drink there was ready for him. After two sips, the doctor said aloud, “This isn’t a hazelnut daiquiri!” The bartender replied, “I’m sorry, it’s a hickory daiquiri, doc.”

The Mayor of Oakland California looks like a communist mole to me.

So, our new world seems to boil down to CVS/Aetna versus Cigna/Express Scripts. Is that about it?

If President Trump’s effort delivers a denuclearized North Korea, the headlines will read, “Trump’s peace treaty with Kim eliminates millions of US Defense jobs. Unions To rally in Big DC March for War.”

Oh, BTW, for some reason or another today is Women’s Day. Just in case you feel pretty in pink.

Oh yeah, and Lesley Vonn says she has trouble finding dates. It’s ok if you want to step up to honor National Women’s day.

The Answer:

There will be opinions on this one but here this list by Michael Peck on the website “The National Interest”: Horatio Gates, George McClellan (The Civil War was a factory for producing bad generals like Brandon Bragg and Ambrose Burnside.), Lloyd Fredendall (WWII), Douglas Mac Arthur and Tommy Franks (Iraq). I’m sure Viet Nam Vets have some strong opinions on bad generals.  

Nothing would make me happier than to have all of the woman smiling at the end of this day, their day.

 See you tomorrow.