Today's Tids Issue 4,758
This won't hurt:
“The shop assistant fought off an armed robber with his labelling gun. Police are looking for a man with a price on his head.” Looks like the beginning of a pun-filled week due the courage of a very punny lady Tidster.
Well, I exhausted my Tidlet reservoir with that one. Anything going on in the world I could write about?
Perhaps the most relevant poll statistic among all polls is the low number of undecideds this year versus 2016. It is unlikely now that there would be a momentous shift in votes, Is that what the word polarizing means?
Have you noticed how many politicians are ruling by the power of the swab? Yes that small piece of low tech, basically advanced toothpick technology, seems to be providing many state officials with enormous almost dictatorial power. Down with swabs.
The Question:
Quick- What are the twelve astrological signs in order. Hint, the first sign starts with the Vernal equinox and is Aries.
That new Bud commercial with the cardboard cutout sports fan may be one of the best ever. Well, it had me laughing, and several people in the room with me.
Election jitters has Wall Street vibrating a bit. But it is not a matter of who wins but the uncertainty of not being able to determine the winner fast enough. If there is anything WS hates, its uncertainty.
Did you hear about the baker who desserted her boyfriend?
The Headlines:
--Stimulus Uncertainty Has markets Dropping After Decent Opening.
--Supreme Court To hear Case On Trump Wall Funding.
--Mnuchin-Pelosi To Talk Stimulus.
--Ten States report Highest Single Day V Covid Cases.
--Fed Judge Halts Trump Food Stamp Cuts.
--Belgium Is Back On Path To Regain Covid Central Title. Cass There Soar.
Maybe if indigenous supporters cajole weak-kneed pols to give up a day celebrating the great explorer Columbus, we could replace it with another group of courageous people who go to battle each day trying to tickle America’s funny bone with humerus puns; they get the slings and arrows and groans for their lowest form of humor. But everybody laughs deep down inside at their simplistic lunacy.
I just think that Beethoven had a better Public Relations Team than Brahms. Life is all about public relations.
Tids editors have been decrying Social Media for years. It is too powerful for uniformed minds. But now that we are seeing that it is more than freedom of speech, perhaps like controlled bias, the cyber ideology medium could become a de facto government.
The Kyrie from Durufle’s “Requiem” is intensely beautiful music.
I payed golf this morning with a Navy war veteran of many battles, and he said in no uncertain terms that he has had it with watching sports. He said overpaid athletes don’t get it, and he doesn’t need their opinions. From my observations and form the reactions of venerable Tids readers, he is the Tip of the iceberg that could bring down the Titanic sports empire. Players are being paid because they are entertainers, and nothing more.
Microwaves wash up on tiny beaches.
New world criminals are like those who developed the CVS endless reminder phone messages. “Hello..”
Do you think Northerners will get even hardier as they continue to eat at restaurants out in the cold? Everything is relevant. Cold is relevant to how much you can endure. And time is relevant to how much you need.
Investigator: An alligator wearing a vest.
I would be for postponing the census. We’ve postponed everything else. And ten census tis too important to be underreported, which it could be for sure.
What makes a person’s golf game completely disappear? I’m asking for a friend.
The Answer:
The order of signs after Aries is Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius and Pisces.
The Tids actually get better the more time I spend outside. I actually see people doing weird stuff instead of making it up. Turning off TV also happens to freshen the mind with new ideas, even if you aren’t writing this morning mess. Is it still morning?
No comments:
Post a Comment