Today's Tids Issue 5,389
The Laughter:
Save the Earth! It is the only planet with chocolate.
And, I expect that all of me fine ancestors from the Emerald Isle will be throwing shillelaghs at me because I didn't start this Tids with a big rosy faced Happy Saint Patrick's Day. But, chocolate is chocolate.
Bulldozer: Someone sleeping during a political speech.
That Furman finish over Virginia yesterday is why March Madness is so delightfully mad, and fun and exciting for all. And Princeton dismantling Arizona was a work of art. So, with all of the hype and surprises, the NCAA basketball tournaments always remind us to never give up hope.
The Question:
In our continuing quest for the perfect body, we are often sucked into joining a gym. I have never been sucked in because I would never expose this body of mine anywhere. What are five things that gyms don’t want you to know?
The Headlines:
--Xi to Meet with Putin March 20-22 to Show Support for Russia President.
--Markets Lower; SVB Parent Declares Chapter 11 Bankruptcy.
--Raging Avalanche of Potatoes Kills Eight In India as Storage Facility Roof Collapses.
--Charles to Change Camilla’s Title from Queen Consort to Queen; She will sit Along Side of Him at Coronation; Diana Fans Miffed; Mother Rolling Over in Royal Tomb.
--NK’s Kim Says ICBM Test is Designed to Strike Fear in the Hearst of Enemies.
--14-Year-Old Boy in Mexico Arrested For Murder of 8.s
--Hunter Biden Files Suit Against Laptop Repairman Citing Invasion of Privacy.
I’m writing a book about all the things I should have done with my life. It’s called an “Oughtobiography”.
We have a fine Irish governor here in Rhode Island who thinks the leprechauns have put all their gold in RI taxpayers' wallets. Yes, he tiptoes through the green rolling hills spreading the green among all of his political darlings.
There is a fine line between the numerator and the denominator.
One simple reason why tenants are being priced out of their cities is because tourists pay more.
Here is one reason why there is global inflation: “Greece to raise minimum wage again before election”. It is politicians, pure and simple.
What’s with the younger movie director genre thinking that dull and dark somehow makes movies better? In many new films even daylight is murky. It is not only mentally depressing, but also impossible to see anybody in some scenes.
I thought of something funny to say about that potato avalanche in India killing eight, but even I am not that offensive.
My Dad was a mixture of Irish and Quaker. He never knew whether to laugh or ponder.
Ler’s hope the investment community isn’t underestimating future rate hikes on hope alone.
Silence can never be misquoted.
The Answer:
First, they know you will probably stop attending, but they don’t care because you are paying monthly. And besides, if everybody to whom they sold a membership came it would be too crowded. Two -- most of the products they try to sell you (ie. Amino Acids, Protein shakes) are overpriced and a waste of money. Three – Gyms in general don’t cater to serious lifters. Five – Don't automatically trust everything your instructor/trainer says. Five – Getting in shape isn't as mysterious and difficult as gyms would tell you. Six – More equipment isn't always better.
There’s something about being Irish.
The twinkling in the eye,
An ongoing, nagging temptation to be mischievous.
And an overwhelming desire to laugh out loud,
And a continuous feeling of romance and whimsical dreams.
Thanks Mom and Dad.
I always enjoy this tune for Saint Pats Day. There is just something robust about it that’s says it’s great to have a happy Irish heart:
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