Work interrupts play.

Today's Tids Issue 2,492
Opening Stuff:

Happy Hanukkah Everybody! A lichtigin Chanukah. L'Shanah Tovah.

Americans have been occasionally susceptible to some pretty outrageously silly fads. But, you have love the "Layaway Angels" -- Anonymous good people who walk into stores and pay the remaining bills for the layaway items of those less fortunate. It's a national trend. And one of the nice things I have heard is that a few of the recipients of the kindness are passing it forward, donating some of their paid for layaway items to others in need. Gotta love the American heart.

This is that great day of relief for all of those who miss Summer. The days are getting longer again. Feel warm!

I had a great day yesterday. but not such a hot start this morn. They forgot to deliver along with the paper the comics section! Aaaaaaaaarrrrgh!

I was looking for a good recipe for Christmas day, and I came across a moderately complex lobster dish. But, it was so smothered with herbs and foreign substances that I felt it sacrilegious to offer it to you. Anything that diminishes the pure flavor of fresh lobster with butter is not worth repeating.

The Question:
Give me five funny lines from Ray Romano.

The Headlines:

--Kim Jung un To Share Power With Uncle, Military.
--Stocks Open Down After New Eurofears Rise; Oracle Down 13%; Tech Stocks Following Oracle Down.
--Trump, Paul Among Repubs Considering Third Party Challenge; Divide Would Assure Obama Reign Continuation.
--Wal-Mart, Oracle Earnings Shortfalls Shock Investors; Oracle Disappointment Has WS Worried About Tech.
--ECB (European Central Bank) Lends Banks $639 Bil For Three Years; To Shore Up Financial System Now Under Pressure.
--Nor'Easter Could Make Northeast White For Christmas.
--In Japan, Olympus Offices, Exec Homes Raided By Black Garbed Investigators.

Think about the ills of the world, the hunger and the pain; the people battling outrageous, uncompromising diseases and family losses; Brave men and women dying for the good of others. Compare that with an asshole apoplectic over not having his comics in the morning.

So far, about 20-22 new books about the end of the world have been announced for publishing for 2012. The "End Date" is December 21, a year from now. Expect a rash of doomsday everything for the next 12 months, including preachings, movies and TV programs. Travel companies will be promoting "Bucket List" Get-Aways. Restaurants will promote "Last Meals". It could get crazy. And the crazy will make maddening.

I'm still waiting for somebody in Congress to stand up and say, "Hey, wait a minute"...this tax we're agonizing over isn't really a tax, it's a contribution to the ailing Social Security Pension system."

There are lots of things wrong about Big Time Football. But, I bet you never thought it contributed to lower grades, GPA's. And I'm not talking about "Scholar"-Athletes. In an exhaustive study, the U of Oregon has determined that a winning football team brings down significantly the grades of male students. Their euphoria over the bouncing ball has them studying less and partying more. Talking too much about the game-to-come rather than the square root in a Political science problem. Oh well, the Alums are enjoying it.

The most useless section of our local newspaper is the one that brings us quotes from Our Washington DC congressional delegation. US Senators "Puppy Dog" Reed and "Limo Lib" Whitehouse echo religiously the sentiments of the 0-Man and the Dems. Reps "Who me?" Cicilline and "Hey I'm Here Too" Langevin just float along upon a rain cloud, the huge State Dem majority. There's not an independent, original thought in their brains.

Almost Near: Chapter 56 continues. --"You two talk about when I was gone."
"Only that you were a fool. And weird!'
"Oh good, you still love me. So, what do you two think. Is he going after Samantha?" Tucker looked out the window at a man passing by. "Rudy was a bad guy. He deserved to die."
Audrey looked at Tucker sharply. "What makes you think he was a bad guy?"
"He was, wasn't he. You figure somebody gets bashed by a shovel that somebody's mad at him."
Audrey continued to looked at him. "I'm not sure that Barton is serious about Samantha as a suspect. The necklace is incriminating, But, a lot of the other evidence says no."
"Like what?" Audrey chose her words carefully.
"He thinks it is more likely to have been a man. I don't know the details." She knew the details, but she just wasn't ready to tell Tucker everything she knew.
"Why don't you drop me off at the hotel. I'd like to clean up. Where are you going to be?"
She didn't answer. "Barton wants to see you again."
The car came to a stop in front of the Hotel. "I figured." Tucker reached into the back seat and picked up his small bag. He turned his face to Audrey. "You are a beautiful woman." He squeezed her hand, opened the door and stepped out to the sidewalk. "I'll call you at home," he said over his shoulder.
Audrey watched him walk into the hotel. Then she let go of all the emotions she had been holding inside. Her hands were shaking.

The Answer:
On golf: "I love hitting into the rough. It brings me closer to the people." "My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning." “I feel like this is a dream - and I apologize for how I dressed some of you.” "If my father had hugged me one more time, Id be an accountant." "Every parent knows that for a kid, a car is chloroform." " For the sake of you marriage, Get a King-Sized bed. And if you really want to stay marries, get two." "I'll be spending the holidays with my family. Nothing special, just some light bickering and biting sarcasm."

If you don't think about what's going on in the world, then the world is a pretty great place.

Valor reflected in Dramatic Seas.

Today's Tids Issue 2,232
Opening Stuff:

The fall sky transformed the the wind driven seas of Narragansett Bay into a srtiking painting of shades of grays highlighted by glistening silver. It was a solemn, yet imposing body of water that gave welcome this day to bands of splashing seals down from Maine for winters feast. An imposing body of water that had a special look for the day. A look that seemed to honor heroes in a way that paid to tribute their selfless service to America. Nature came to celebrate the veterans of US Wars. It was the perfect backdrop for honor, accomplishment, giving of life. And often the soul. Let's pause for a minute.

How come when you play a hole on a windy day, the wind blows 25 knots when you going towards the hole but just about stops when going the other way?

The Question:
I thought that Jonathon Winters was one of the funniest comedians ever. Name three of his characters.

The Headlines:

--Americans Salute Brave Soldiers.
--Pessimism Dominates Opening Of G-20 Meetings; Intense Split Over Currency And Trade Policies; Many Irate Over Fed's Plan To Pump In $600 Billion Which Would Devalue The Dollar.
--Poor Cisco Performance has Markets On Tech Slide.
--Fixed Mortgage rates At New Lows.
--Foreclosures Down; Downturn Mainly the Result Of Paperwork Snafus.
--Powerful Bomb Rocks Central Karachi Pakistan

Back to More Stuff:
C-Span should be going to South Korea to cover the G-20. Now that will be entertainment. Of course one of the great confrontations may be Obama meeting with Chinese leaders after extolling the for three days the virtues of their chief competitor India, and then trying to explain why it is good for the Chinese to have there loans paid back in devalued dollars.

The world is getting so weird that it is making Jonathan Winters look sane!

Things are looking up for the beleaguered Tids sports department as they came through with another reasonable week. And it could have been better if Detroit Buffalo had held on for cool upsets. Last week's 10-3 brings us to 86-43 (67%). This week is loaded with tough picks including Balt-Atlanta (Tonight), Pitt-NE, Minn-Chi, Tenn-Miami, Buff-Det, Jets-Cleve, KC-Den, St. Louis-SF,and Phil-Wash. I'm going Pitt (And that hurts big time), Balt, Minn, Tenn, Buff, Cleveland, KC, SF and Philly. The rest of the winners will be the Giants, Jax, Indy,TB and Arizona. Help!

I see where Chairman of the Senate Budget Committee, (D) Kent Conrad, is saying that "the nation faces the real possibility of becoming a second teir economic power if it fails to address the multi-trillion deficit." Where was he when the Dems were spending the money, pressuring banks to ease mortgage requirements, watching an economy where the only available new jobs were government jobs?

I don't mind the World Health Organization (WHO) working to bring nutrition to third world countries, but stop sending menu suggestions to my local paper. And meat producing countries like Brazil say that inducing people to eat fruit and nuts could be an economic disaster for their economy. Leave me alone!

There were only 41 Pilgrims on the Mayflower. It is hard to belive how many millions of Americans now say they are the progeny of that brave band of separatists. In case you are interested, Presidents John Admas, John Q. Adams, Zachery Taylor, U.S. Grant, James Garfield, FDR and GHW and GW Bush are all descendants of that Plymouth group. Also, Sarah Palin is a descendant. I wonder what that means?

Generations Department:
This morning on the radio I heard two men reminissing good naturedly about where they fell on the draft lottery. A third member of the team, a younger man, was in awe saying things like "You had to do that?". I, listening, was remembering the fear of being taken at any time because there was no lottery and everybody was eligible.

And, how about the states which are saying to the telephone companies, you are not obligated to mass print phone books any more? This ain's your grandpa's America.

The Answer: When he was in an asylum somewhere, Jonathan Winters was keeping everybody laughing. He could become any character at any time, but is best know for Maudie Frickert. Elwood P. Sluggins and Dr. Bellenhoffer, He was one of the all time great improvisational inspirations I would start laughing before he spoke.

The End:
Jonathan Winters once said, "If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it." I wonder how that wouold play in a socialist America?

Winter's must have slo time traveled into Today's world of reality TV when he said "Now the freaks are on television, the freaks are in the movies. And it's no longer a sideshow, it's the whole show.The colorful circus and the clowns and the elephants , for all intents and purposes, are gone. And, we are only dealing with the freaks.