Today's Tids Issue 3,090
Opening Stuff:
The warm spring arrived, sun bright and glistening,
penetrating the bones long chilled by winter’s anger, and with it cars…the God
damned cars. Clogging the streets and highways. People roaming aimlessly,
looking for the bounties from warmth. Where has my peace and solitude gone?
Only 138 days until the contentment. Until the first frost drives them back
into their caves.
“Make elephant abuse illegal
in Rhode Island.” Say what? We have an elephant problem? Of course, that headline in the big
newspaper is just the opinion of an animal lover angry at the circus. But, it
is just the latest example of our government for one, in action. Hey, we have bigger fish to fry here in RI,
like abuse of calamari, slimy little sea animals well on the way to canonization
in this state with no jobs. They already have a miracle in their favor – that somebody
would look at them wriggling in the belly of a boat and think, “They look good
enough to eat”. But, I digress, from the distress of the poor struggling
elephants here in RI. The next time you see an elephant in your neighborhood,
give it a peanut and stroke its trunk. It will love you.
It’s about your Soul, Department:
The
big dilemma in in RI is whether or not to to pay back the $75 Million moral
obligation bond secured by the state in behalf of a new company. The questions
arising about to or not to pay concern the effect on the State’s bond rating. On
whether non-payment will hurt the bond rating, some are saying yes, drastically,
perhaps to “Junk” status for years, Other knowledgeable sources say, Wall
street will recognize it’s a “One Off” – not indicative of regular payment
habits. But lost in it all is something I just don’t understand, the morality
of paying back money. Is this really what big finance is all about – getting away
with screwing lenders. Is this why enteritis take risks -- because there are no
ramifications if you sufficiently hide your morals, your ethics. Something’s
just don’t compute for me. I guess it’s the way I’m wired.
Eating at an expensive Steak House
restaurant is a rare treat.
The Question:
Donavan
and Cat Stevens (AKA Yusuf Islam) were two of the quirkiest among the 70’s array
of singers. Name five of their songs.
The Headlines:
--As
Techs And S,Mall caps Stocks Slide, M&A Activity Could Rise Dramatically
--Assad
Gaining strength As the Election Nears; Rebels Leave Homs.
--Russian
Loyalists Vote For Independent Government In Eastern Ukraine.
--Popular
Pope Francis Endorses UN Policiy Of Economic redistribution.
--South
Korea Says NK Must Go.
--Sterling
Apologizes To NBA; Says Wife As No Rights To Basketball Team.
I love little guy beats big
guy stories
and one of the best occurred yesterday, when Bryant University went up to the
big Dome in Syracuse and beat the #2 rated Big Orange in NCAA Lacrosse. Bryant
of Smithfield RI has been building ever since the insightful President there
reached out to embattled coach Mike Pressler. You remember Pressler don’t you. He
was the coach of Duke’s number one team when the sanctimonious overreached in
one of those bogus race eruptions and killed the reputation of great guy and
fantastic coach. Now, he is loyal to little Bryant, who may not be little much
longer. Oh yeah, Little Bryant this spring had woman’s lacrosse, softball and
tennis teams going to the NCAA’s. NCAA championship play has become habitual
now at the beautiful little school in the hills of north east RI.
Hunter Hayes is just the last young
Country music star who has proven that you don’t have to be a knucklehead to
get publicity. His little 24 hour Max Performance tour raised millions for
hungry kids. He didn’t punch any cops of get pinched. He just went out and did something
positive. There are millions of teens who do great things, all of the time, but
are often overshadowed by the slimeballs.
Are you ready? You asked for
it, and now
The Tids renown Nutrition Center, after months of painstaking research and
field testing, is ready to announce the best “Puffy” cheese Curls and facsimiles
of curl shapes. The criterion was to open a bag of cheese puffs and eat until
the flavor became boring. The Winner and Champion Cheese Curl for 2014 is the
Utz Baked! Rated bad for dietary objectives as the flavor never ends, and bags
are near impossible to close and stow for another day. Cheetos puffy were
second, good for flavor, but inconsistent and leaving too much gunk on teeth. A
possible future Puff winner were Chester’s (Magnetic and available at Wal-Mart).
Jax, after several repeated attempts failed to meet the high Standards of the
Tids Taste Longevity test. Cheese Doodles from Wise have a strange flavor which
may be beautiful in the eyes of other beholders. Trader Joes, while favored by
the hip and upwardly mobile, were tasteless to our discerning nutritionists,
like many of the touted TJ products. The Tids Labs were unable to test enough
of brands Pirates Booty, Gibble’s, Garden of Eatin’ or 365 Everyday Value
Cheese Puffs to adequately fairly rate them. But, they will be a new challenge
for 2015.
The best way to lose a friend fast is to
suggest that they look like some famous person.
Speaking of kids who can do it positively, I
watched an interview with a young first generation Columbian boy on his way to
Harvard. His mom doesn’t speak English, and his High School was discredited a couple
of years ago. But in this tiny, mostly Columbian Town of Central Falls of empty
factories with all of the drug problems and poverty that would bring people
down, there is intense spirit; desire to strive, to fight their way up. The
town was saved the town in bankruptcy and the School system energized, the focus
for the hope of their youth. The young man going to Harvard to the amazement of
his family said this about his accomplishment he said, “Work and you can do
anything.”
America is the land of
opportunity.
Some people just look in the wrong places. It is always in your heart.
Maybe the boy can convince some at
Harvard U that victory lies in the hearts of good people, and not in the bureaucracies
of gorged governments.
You can be sure that somebody will probably
write a column about rampant homophobia as the reason why Gay football player Michael
Sam was taken in the final round. The reason he dropped is because he performed
miserably at the NFL tryout combine. But then, try to apply logic to rampant irrationalism.
Target is all bright and
colorful, a
favorite of young families, but it is Sears that delivers. Target may have something
of each, but Sears has broad selection of each. And I would go there any time
over any of the general purpose department stores. But, the fact remains that
when you use your mojo, people won’t go. Too many people still associate Sears
with catalogue tear-out sheets for the outhouse.
We need 23 Marine 1 Helicopters at $400,000,000
each? That’s what has just been approved by the DoD – One presidential
helicopter and $88 Billion worth of backups. The US government knows redundancy.
Over the weekend I got a message from Skype
about being a nice boy and calling Mom. Technology can do a lot more these days, but my mother died 6
years ago. I wonder?
If you search beneath the surface of
Delibes, you discover a trove of beautiful music.
I seem to have a unique ability to annoy
people with my impulsiveness.
If college professors are so smart, how come so
many chose to be so liberal?
As one reader told me that the new answer to “
why the Chicken crossed the road?”, is -- “It’s Bush’s fault and you’re a racist.”
The Answer:
Donavan
always seemed a bit weird to me but he had some big songs I enjoyed, Hurdy
Gurdy Man, Mellow Yellow, Sunshine Superman, Jennifer Juniper, Catch the Wind,
Colours and Wear your love like Heaven. Cat Stevens first big one was Morning
has Broken. He also scroed with peace Train, Wild World, hardheaded Woman,
Moonshadow, Oh very Young and Father and Son.
For some strange reason the
name of one of my favorite singers – Harry Chapin – popped into my head. He was killed
in an accident way too early. The epitaph on his grave stone said: “Oh if a man
tried To take his time on earth, And prove before he died what one man’s life
could be worth, I wonder what would happen to this world.” A little chapin music
to start the week:
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