Small Change.

Today's Tids Issue 3,855

For returning to a slow simmer:

No deep thoughts today. It’s the last Tids of April, sounding like a melody that promises arrays of brilliant floral colors across rolling fields. Expanses, where green gets greener, and forests fill out for the shading of summer. I often retreat into my hidden valleys where small streams trickle; cooling waters that reflect up fresh, stimulating air upon my face. I can travel a zillion miles away just listening to the bubbling of creeks and brooks clearing away the moist earth gorged by winter’s snow and spring rains. One of our greatest gifts is the comfort of secluded, unencumbered nature. I keep the images near.

Remember when you could actually buy stuff with the pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters found in the cushions of couches and chairs?

You know, I can write a lot of happy words and nonsense paragraphs, but the fact is becoming apparent that the North Korea situation is a lot more than a daily news story that will disappear when reporters get tired of writing about it. I have to tell you, that even in my infinite wisdom, I have trouble arriving at a sensible solution. I’m going to trust the experts and hope that The President does too.

I was addicted to the Hokey Pokey, but thankfully I turned myself around.

The Question:

Double “Q” Friday: 1. What has been determined by Guinness Records to be the largest church in the world?  2. A cow, an infant, a teen boy, and the goat like, flute playing Greek god of nature and shepherds are sitting in a line at a restaurant table. What did they order?

The Headlines:

--GDP Report Has Dow And S&P Dipping After Opening Higher; Nasdaq Strengthens After Strong Earnings From Alphabet And Amazon.

--Congress Readies For Big Vote To Avoid Shutdown.

--Trump’s First Q GDP Reporting Shows Weakest Growth In Three Years – 0.7%; 0,3% Consumer Spending growth Lowest In 7 years; Economist Forecast Rebound To Hefty 3% Growth In Second Q.

--China Threatens North Korea With Sanctions If Nuke Test Persist.

--Trump Skeletal Tax Proposal: IBM – US Badly Needs Modern Tax System; Gary Cohn – “Trump Wants Washington Out Of Middle Class Pockets”.

--ESPNW Removes Poem That Praised Cop Killer; Station Reserved For Feminism Expression Says It Failed In It’s Oversight.

--Elizabeth Warren And Many Liberal Groups Disturbed By Obama’s High Speaking Fees From Wall Street.

I was going to give you an informed analysis of the worlds Isthmuses, but I had trouble connecting.

Cleveland resisted the temptation to pick from a less than stellar QB field, going for the consensus best player in the draft – Defensive End/OLB Myles Garrett. I have a special place in my heart for the Browns. I don’t know why, but I feel for them. Maybe it’s because of all their great players in the 1940’s and fifties. Or maybe it’s because unknowledgeable comedians and pundits unfairly discredit the city’s greatness. Or maybe it’s just because so many wonderful people live there. Go Browns. I’m with you.

Did you see where robots are being used quite successfully to pick apples. Actually, most big crops are harvested with machines. The use of machines to pick products where outside appearance is important, like rosy red apples, is new. It is expected that this could dramatically cut the need for west coast migrant workers. We have a knack of belaboring issues, which as new technology emerges will inevitably disappear.

 Remember how great the feeling whenever you found a half dollar!

“Duh” Headline of the Week: Rhode Island Democrats Attack Trump Tax Plan.

If sea rise experts are correct, Miami’s South Beach will soon be South Shoals. SOS!

A reader took issue with yesterday’s Tids stance against eliminating the penny. He says dimes are lighter to carry and the shinier coin will be a better ball marker for old people with fading eye sight. “Let the penny go; suck it up,” he says. I’m going to sue him for slandering old people.

I expect that after Trump probably says about the GDP numbers that he is still dealing with the Obama economy; the Media will love it as another excuse to get all over him. As I remember, 0-man used Bush as an excuse for misdoings for about 7 ½ years.

If they get rid of pennies, will the Government require that all sales tax payments be rounded up to the nearest nickel or dime?

My head is often in the clouds. But, I still have trouble understanding how cloud computing companies make money. I guess I’m paying for the service for the wireless and software services I use that infuse the cloud into my day. In reality, I get nervous sending stuff into something as vague sounding as – The Cloud!

Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the calendar factory for taking a day off?

One way to handle change, is to put it in a parking meter. And you’d better hurry before hey change it allot electronic cards.  

Maybe April has been so gray because there are too many words being sent into the clouds.

Small change today is a five-dollar bill.

Reading Between the Lines Movie Reviews:

--The Circle was high my list, but early extremely low reviews are giving me second thoughts. Good cast, Tom Hanks and Emma Watson.  Watson is hired to work for the worlds largest tech and social media company. As she rises through the ranks of this company owned by Hanks, she begins to see more and more disturbing things about the effects of their experiment upon the lives and future of family fiends and humanity in general; and her own privacy, personal freedom and ethics soon disappear. Still sounds good to me.

-- Sleight is about a young black street magician, who when he and his sister’s parents die, turns to crime to provide income to live. When he gets in too deep, his sister is kidnapped, and he turns to his magic to save her. Intriguing.

--Below Her Mouth looks like a bad movie (Critics 23%) about a female couple a roofer and a fashion designer, who share a powerful and immediate connection that derails their lives. Said to be bold and Uninhibited. (The ad says “A cinematic voice to the female orgasm”)

-- Scoring even lower than “Mouth” and “Circle” is Rupture. In fact this is one of the lowest scoring films I have ever seen. I don’t even know why I’m writing this! A woman deathly afraid of spiders is abducted by a group of strangers. Guess what? Yes, they exploit her genetic fears hoping that she will emerge as an alien from outer space. Got that?

The Answer:

Obviously, Saint Peter’s in the Vatican has been clearly established as the paragon for large basilicas. But wait, no so fast! Down in Africa in the Ivory Coast, there is a giant church called “Our Lady of Peace” that beats Saint Peter’s in overall height and has room to seat comfortably seat 18,000! The largest cathedral in the USA is the Episcopal Saint John the Devine in NYC 2. The cow, infant, the boy and Greek goat like god ordered “Moo Goo Guy Pan”. Thanks to Hillary Price.

Pray for the awakening of a sensible Kim.

Have a great weekend, E-v-e-r-y-b-o-d-y!