God is watching for typos

Today's Tids Issue 4,480

Humor should be funny😀

I wish you all a most happy day!

Here’s hoping I have something to say

To help you smile along the way!

A nourishing morsel like Chick-fil-A!

I always liked Cokie Roberts.

Even as danger descended upon her nest, the mother bird remained unflappable.

Stretching is very good for you. So, when buying your salty snacks, always go for the packages on the highest shelves. Oh, what a feeling!

The left has successfully taken over very good countries worldwide by chipping away at historical foundations. It is happening today here with some of these imaginary self-serving re-readings of US history. And it becomes criminal when its taught in schools.

The Question:

What were the primary occupations of great American Composer Carl Ives and Everest conqueror Sir Edmund Hillary? Bonus: For what reason were yellow tennis balls invented.

The Headlines:

--Powell Rate Cut Expected To Fall Short Of Trump’s Wish List; Market To Open Down And Cautious; Stocks Continue Down Through Mid Moring..

--Trump Asks Treasury To Significantly Increase Sanctions Against Iran.

--President Names State Department Envoy Robert O’Brian As New National Security Advisor; Trump And Graham Opposed On Iran Policy; WH Seems To Be Taking Soft Stance.

--Lewandowski Stymies, Angers Dems During Inquisition.

--Israel’s Netanyahu Seems To Be In Deep Trouble As Opponent Gantz Edges Him Out In Election; Pulling Together A New Governed Near Impossible For Netty; Indictment Vise Tightens.

--China’s Economy Decline May Make Trade Deal More favorable In new talks.

--NY Bans Favored E-Cigs.

--Oklahoma Lass Arrested After Vowing To Kill 400 High School Students For Fun. She Had A Massive Arsenal In Her Home.

--Warren Looking For Love Fest On Colbert Show Gets Skewered On Middle Income Tax Increases Instead.

--NFL QB Injury Surge May Have Teams Seeking Out Kaepernick

If I had a nickel for every bad bread pun, I’d have a pun per nickel.

One of the best things among many that the return to cooler weather brings is having to wear outer shirts with more pockets to hold extraneous stuff.

AOC’s doomsday climate forecast feels exactly like Y2K. If you get my drift.

Are the Grimm Brothers and Hans Christina Anderson back from the grave writing the Dem candidate’s fairy tales? Actually, there is a difference – you wouldn’t let your children read these new tales of hypocrisy.

Finally, a college football game worthy of looking forward to – Notre Dame at Georgia. I like inter-sectional games that tend to sort out the reality of teams,

Isn’t it child abuse if you scare the bejesus out of children with apocalyptic threats from Climate Change.

When papa bird came home late mama bird was Flappergasted.

What would the US government look like today if it was run like parliamentary governments where the highest elected official has to form a government by blending together various ideological factions. The prospects are frightening. But, in a way this is what is happening with calls for impeachment of anything distasteful to one group or another. Stability of survival.

If you listen carefully, MAGA means different things to different groups of people. To some it is a grievous insult. To others it is a call for the return of our country’s position of respect and admiration in the world. May see it as bringing back old-time middleclass jobs. Like everything these days, people see what they want to see.

Left fielder “Yaz” hammers a homer to deep center field in Fenway. Is this a 1967 headline? Nope, it was last night as I many like me sat before our TV’s smiling as the grandson of Mighty Yaz strode to the plate. Swoosh – Boom! Young Yaz did what Grandpa had done so often, thrilled the crowd, a crowd despite being on the losing end of the blast, loved what they saw; lived once more in glory days of yore. My smile turned to chills and tingles and memories of those wonderful summer days my favorite player of all was exerting every ounce of energy in his body every day, every game, every play.  “The Yaz” always made me smile.

I was never a big fan of Eli Manning, but he should have been treated a little better by the Giants now trying to achieve respectability by benching the double Super Bowl wining veteran QB. Did I just recall his double Super Bowl Wins? The heartache returns.

A “left” fielder for San Fran. Young Yaz must be fitting in nicely.

What do you call a cantaloupe cancer? Melanoma.

Is it my imagination, or are we seeing more NFL players making demands to be traded from weaker teams to better teams? I doubt if NFL management will allow this to go very far, as Parity has always been their main objective. And what fan doesn’t want to see strong match-ups all of the time. The NFL won’t let te league go the way of the NBA where the player conspire to form their own super teams at the expense of competitive play across the league.

The latest con: Venmo, a Pay pal company, is a digital wallet that lets you make and share payments with friends. Like splitting a restaurant bill or cab fare. In the new scam, Venmo users get a text message under the guise of the same colors and fonts of the real App. The text tells receivers that their accounts are about to be charged. But they can easily cancel by typing in any telephone number and password they want, plus a verified credit card number, and by providing additional financial information. I believe it’s just essential to ignore any email or phone call  or text requesting any personal information.

So, the AGT finals were last night. The judges went berserk over every act. That’s why I DVR through judges. My guess is that V.Unbeatable, who were thrilling in the opener and Kodi Lee, a season long fave could be still standing in the end. 11-Year-Old Opera singer Emanne Beasha is beyond belief. but can she get enough votes? She would get my vote. Another Youngster Tyler Butler-Figuroa is talented and put on an energetic performance with his violin and moderate dancing, but I got bored half way through.. Ryan Niemiller is a nice guy and like him. But I don’t find him as funny as some of the judges.  I liked the Voices of Service a lot, but don’t see them in the top five. I got tired of watching the ligh balance Kids after a third of their act.. Benicio Bryant can sing, but isn’t he just another good singer in a competition show. I enjoyed Ndilovu Youth Choir. It is tough picking a winner out of this bunch. Like, in the past I have felt a favorite. My favorite acts were V., Voices of Service, Emanne, Ndilovu and Kodi (Although I’ve enjoyed him more in previous performances. The audience was manic over each performance so that their undiscriminating enthusiasm tended to make all acts appear equal. But, I didn’t see it that way.  

The Answer:

Carl Ives, truly one of America’s greatest composers, was an Insurance Agent! Hillary, the first to climb Everest was a beekeeper. Bonus: When professional tennis became televised, it was found that if they used yellow balls, the viewer could better follow the play.

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to become a vegetarian,

If God is watching us, the best we can do is to be entertaining.