Telling Tuesday

Today's Tids Issue 5,246 

Sarah Palin for Congress: 

 

 

I love sarcasm frolicking  

Amidst absurd politicking.  

 

Today is National Tell A Joke Day. “If you boil a funny bone, it becomes a laughing stock. That’s humerus.” (Thanks to a very punny reader!) 

 

Today is the big day for two anti-Trump Repub activists – Liz Cheney and Lisa Murkowski. Lisa will probably be in the final election runoff in November because of a new Alaska technicality. But Liz is looking now like losing to Harriet Hageman in a romp. The decline of Liz in Wyoming isn’t necessarily over her Jan 6 Committe and relentless pursuit of DT. It’s because that is all she is doing, which translates into not listing to the people of Wyoming. Hageman has been all about issues sought by the Peeps of the great Repub State. I don’t like it here at all when my congress people campaign on federal issues when local issues are what I live within.  

By the way, the real news circulating beneath the surface on Liz Cheney is that she is laying a foundation to to run for Prez in 2024, and her entire campaign will be about stopping the Trumpster from ever entering the Oval Office again. I'm sure she may hit an issue along the way. 

 

“I have a friend. He keeps trying to convince me he’s a compulsive liar, but I don’t believe him.” — Ben Bailey 

 

The Question: 

What are considered Steve Corell’s best roles? 

 

The Headlines: 

--Stocks Surge After Tepid, Mixed Opening; HD and Walmart Report Better Than Expected Revenue And Earnings; Both Point To Improved Guidance Over Last Quesrter.  

--Ukraine Bringing War To Crimea. 

--Western States looking At Cuts In Water Y Usage. 

--CEO Of Covid Vaccine Maker Pfizer And Jill Biden Test Positive For Covid. 

--DoJ Asks Judge To Keep Search Warrant Afficavit Under Wraps. 

--Alabama, Ohio State, Georgia, Clemson and Notre Dame Top 5 in NCAA Pre-Season Football Poll. 

--Tiger Woods To meet With 20 Top PGA Golfers In the World To Discuss LIV, And Loyalty to PGA; What Can They Do to make PGA Better.  

--FBI Returns Trump’s Seized Passports. 

 

Today is also National Rum Day. The more rum you drink the funnier you think bad jokes become. That's because if you are telling them in a crowd of people drinking along with you, they will laugh along with you. “The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.” I wonder if anybody is laughing. 

 

When it comes ot earth science news, I am really interested in Towering Hydrothermal Vents. A research team from Lehigh U has discovered a giant mass of these in active vents in the East Pacific Rise 200 miles west of Mexico. These three-story building high vent covering a relatively huge area of 829 yards may be the largest ever discovered. They gush mineral filled black water heated to at its source to 810 degrees F. It is a sign if significant volcanic activity with a potential for a major eruption in a couple of years. It is also a reminder if the intense magma activity beneath the earth’s surface. The earth is a living breathing entity existing and reacting on its own its own without the help of man's foibles.  

 

A dad is washing the car with his son. After a moment, the son asks his father, "Do you think we could use a sponge instead?" 

 

Hey, don’t forget Sarah Palien running for Congress in Alaska trying to get back in the limelight. A maybe to argue with AOC or Ilan Omar on the floor 

 

What really bothers me these days is that the focus is on Trump running for president two years from now, when the only thing I care about in politics is is getting a Repub Congress in 2 and a ½ months. We’ll see, but it will be real close. But I really worry about this country if the current Admin gets two more years of a favorable Congress.  

 

Gridlock is one of the best things that can happen to our country these days 

 

“I used to be Snow White but I drifted, --Mae West. 

 

It seems sensible to avoid stocks that blossomed during Covid Isolation days, like Zoom, Moderna, indoor games, food delivery companies and even some internet retail operations. 

 

I just finished “Grey Man” and it may have been the worst movie I have seen in a long time. The final 30 minutes were in the dark and I had no idea about which characters I was watching. They say Netflix spent $250Million producing it, and $40 million on one chase/fighting scene, that tells you all you need to know about the depth of the story. If they had just spent a million or more on a few writers, they may have actually been some tension and suspense in this this so-called thriller. Whatever happened to scripts? 

 

Actually, most of the newer movies are pretty much formula efforts with the actors in different hero costumes. They prefer “Quip’ writers over script writers just to make adventurous character of the moment sound clever.  What happened to movies that made you think about the intricacies of plot.  

 

“The liberals can understand everything but people who don’t understand them.” — Lenny Bruce 

 

A big company just announced a new top executive called “Chief People Person” {CPP). Say what? Is that supposed to imply to workers that management cares? I remember working for companies taken over, and each new CEO who came along was basically an accountant hailed as a “People Person: That was always the first clue that you should find a new career.  

 

Allen Weisselberg may be pleading guilty to tax evasion charges on Thursday. Weisselberg is the Trump organization CFO, their financial guy who has been described as knowing everything there is to know about the Trump Businesses. Nobody knows what w he has been telling the authorities, but he knows a lot. Nobody knows what he is saying to get a reduced sentence. This is perhaps the biggest story of all. 

 

One Trump lawyer said a day or so ago, “All of these legal dilemmas will disappear when Donald stops running for President.” 

 

My email password has been hacked. That's the third time I've had to rename the cat. 

 

I have lived in a couple of houses with wells. And experienced water conservation, especially in August when the well hit rock bottom. I'm not surprised there is a water shortage this August in the west. But while the climate maybe a prat of the effect, also quite likely due to the fact that more and more people are moving to these historically arid regions trying to grow stuff which requires a lot more water than normal. The water problem in the west is the fault of the Chambers of Commerce. 

 

I have found while writing his mess that people don’t always understand tongue in cheek. Then I have to respond to letters to explain myself. WhichI don’t always do well, because sarcasm gets in the way. 

 

The Answer: 

I always thought Steve was very funny in on the Daily Show with Jon Stewart. But I always thought Stephen Colbert was funny then too. But Steve became likable and is still funny. Number 8 on this list of best roles is, The 40-Year-Old Virgin. The rest are The Big Short, Battle of the Sexes, Crazy Stupid Love, Foxcatcher, Beautiful Boy, Little Miss Sunshine, and #1, of course, The Office. 

 

I love how in horror movies the person will ask, "Is anyone there?" As if the killer would say "Oh yeah I'm in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?"