First things first.

 

 

 

Today's Tids Issue 5,334 

Humans!: 

 

 

A pun has not completely matured until it is full groan. 

 

What a mess! You know when I was a kid playing baseball and somebody hit it into the bushes and the guys would trudge around looking for it, somebody would finally shout out in frustration. "Just pick up the ball, we’ll look for it later.” Just put somebody in the speaker spot and we can minimize him or her later. 

 

The last time we had a super long vote to anoint a speaker was in the years 1849 and 2856. Think about that. That was in the decade leading up to the Civil War. Here we go again. 

 

Alas, a psychic will never enjoy a surprise party. 

 

The NFL says the Cincy-Buffalo game will not be played this week. Sunday’s schedule is expected to hold. The puzzlement: The Cincy Buffalo result would be significant to final standings at several levels. 

 

The Question: 

So, the great Pele was just buried. This question is who are the greatest 10 athletes ever? Obviously, nobody will agree with the answer. 

 

The Headlines: 

--Markets Trying to Look Rosy While Awaiting Fed Meeting Minutes Later Today; Ali Baba Back in Favor with Chinese Gov. 

--Congress Goes Back to Voting for Speaker this Morning. 

--Damar Hamlin still in Critical Conditioning; He had to be Resuscitated Twice, once on the Field, Once in Hospital; Lungs Damaged; Players s Return to Practice this Morning with Thoughts of a Fellow Player Weighing on their Minds. - 

--Russia Says Unauthorized Use of Their Soldiers Phones Brought on Deadly Rocket Attack from Ukraine.  

--Brutal Storms Heading California’s Way 

 

The media is describing the Repubs as “Dysfunctional” while lauding unity of Dems. Frankly, I could easily describe the Dems as a bunch of sheep following blindly misguided objectives. And the Repubs as independent out of the box thinkers. 

 

Prince Harry says he wants to get back together with his father and brother. Why... is he running out of money? 

 

Beware of a guy buying graph paper. He may be plotting something. You can’t be too careful these days.  

 

Jim Jordan might make the best speaker of all. Or Dan Crenshaw.  

I try to run my days not thinking about what I can’t do any more. I find succumbing to excuses is not good for positivity. Of course, bouncing merrily down the stairs early in the morning may lead to a loud crashing sound. Whoops. 

 

Did you see that news blip that said bank robberies in Denmark are way down, next to zero. The reason is pretty obvious too. The banks have gone quite cashless and there is no cash in the majority of banks. You can have digital currency society without going Crypto. And we will in a very short time.  

 

But, I still haven't worked up the courage to put my wallet on my phone in this new society where the thieves don't wear masks or point guns.  

 

His mother worried when her son studied ornithology in college but he personally has no egrets. 

 

With Twitter, Instagram and the rest, somebody or some institution is always getting blasted. And unfortunately, the media seems only to report the negative side of these stories.  

 

I haven’t had a chance to shovel snow yet this year. I miss it. 

 

Some scientists in Norway have discovered 2-million-year-old DNA in north Greenland which indicates that Greenland was a dessert or at least temperate and warm for quite a period. We know one thing for sure, climate changes. A mere 5K+ years ago the Sahara Desert was a lush tropical treed region with blue birds singing. Yes between 10,500 and 5,500 years ago the Sahara was filled with rich vegetation, cultivated livestock and of course humans. And then the monsoons stopped.  

 

The Answer: 

Number 1 is Michael Jordan according to 149,000 voters casting 2.3 million votes. Next is Lionel Messi, followed by Mohamed Ali, Michael Phelps, Babe Ruth, Usane Bolt, Wilt Chamberlain, Jesse Owens, Roger Federer, and at # 10, Kareem Abdul Jabbar. Moving to 25 we have Bill Russell, Pele (Not One!), Serena Williams, Larry Bird, Mike Tyson, Bruce Lee, Labron James, Magic Johnson, Rafael Nadal, Bo Jackson, Rocky Marshiano, Sugar Ray Robinson, Wayne Gretsky, Tony Hawk and at # 25, “The Big O”, Oscar Robertson. The third great soccer player Ronaldo was 26. The legendary Jim Thorpe was 32 and my favorite Bobby Orr 33. Tom Brady was 34. Tiger Woods was 62. Of interest, after Jim Thorpe, the first Olympic Decathlon Champ to appear was Daley Thompson at #114. Now I believe these guys are truly great athletes, but maybe not public enough for the average voter except maybe Bruce Jenner. (Pop Culture has stripped him of his real importance.) The top Decathlon athletes Jim Thorpe, Bon Mathias, Rafer Johnson and Bruce Jenner, were all given at the time of their winning the official title of “Best Athlete in the World”.  

 

In addition to those four, we also have Olympic winners, Hedge Layland, Harold Osborn, Paavo Ygota, James Bausch, Glenn Morris, Milt Campbell, Will Holdorf, Bill Toomy, Mykota Aviolov, Christan Schenk, Robert Zaneck, Dan O’Brien, Eric Noel, and Ashton Eaton. I know I took a lot of your time with this, but Decathlon winners should be on top of any greatest athletes list. 

 

The two big stories of yesterday were about an athlete beating death in a hospital, and congress dead in the water in DC. Everybody is rooting for the athlete