Two feet of soft snow.

Today's Tids Issue #2,522
Opening Stuff:


Hello lovers! It's February! Get out the paper doilies and red construction paper. Time to think about making some hearts, and making hearts happy. But, Feb is more than romantic yearnings, especially this year when angst will be at its highest threshold on Sundays. And we have Washington and Lincoln Birthdays. Yes, they were still born even though now we celebrate "Presidents day". Yup, Feb is a good month a short month and maybe at last a cold month. But then, the groundhog will tell us tomorrow.

Let's be honest...it is too damned hot! And this health nut doesn't think it's good for physical well-being to go from these semi high temps to deep cold. It's certainly not good for the mind. I put on an extra layer of fat, stowed away the golf clubs; I could have been out there almost daily. Now I'm just sittin' around nursing my blubber.

Some analysts are wondering if the FaceBook IPO is the start of another Tech bubble. Wall Street is wondering if Dot Com style irrational exuberance is getting in the way of conservative, realistic investment strategies. More analysts than not are warning about investing money in a stock with valuations way to high for revenues and profits. It doesn't make sense. But then in this Kardashian world, nothing makes sense. What's next, bundling failed sub prime Green manufacturing companies? But, Green could never be toxic, could it.

The Question:

Who are Exene Cervenka, Linus Roache and Lauren Conrad? Bonus: The Dow had it's best January since 1997! That's quite cool. name the five best and five worst Dow performers in Jan 2012.

The Headlines:

--Romney Romps.
--Hillary Urges UN To Take Action Against Assad; Russia Warns That It Regards Any Action Against Sovereignty Of Syria As "Crossing The Red Line".
--World Feels Happier; Stocks Open Up; Hit 136 At 10:15.
--Taliban With backing Of Pakistan Are Poised To take Over Afghanistan After NATO Leaves.
--US To Charge Ex-Suisse Traders On Subprime Shenanigans.
--11th Body Recovered In Fla I75 Tragedy.
--Jan Private Sector Job Additions Misses Forecast

Salem Revisited Department:
Witchcraft! It's gotta be. The first lady Michelle got Jay Leno to eat his first apple since 1984 and also some healthy foods including a dreadful sounding pizza with eggplant, green peppers and zucchini. Ugh! Talk about selling your soul to the devil! In the front lobby of the Tids world corporate offices there's a bronze statue of Leno sitting down to mashed potatoes with brown gravy topped with Cheetos. I haven't had an apple since 1963, and would never eat a pizza like Leno did unless I was under a spell. It's gotta be witchcraft. It's the only answer.

Beef Stew Department:
This year's Super Bowl promises to be a gut wrenching four hours or so for football fans, especially those from New England and New York Metro, and of course those with a dollar or two on the game. So here's a hearty recipe to keep the energy high! In a large pot, brown a pound of stew beef in a table spoon of butter. Turn heat to medium and add two chopped carrots, 1/2 white onion chopped and 4 cloves chopped garlic. Cook 10-15 minutes stirring occasionally. Add 12 oz Guinness Stout and cook fifteen minutes. Add 1 tbs beef base, 3-4 cups beef broth, tsp black pepper, tsp crushed red pep, tsp thyme, tbs sage and 2 tbs rosemary.Bring to slow boil and cook 2-3 hours until beef is tender (Broth as needed to keep liquid levels consistent). Add peas (Optional for me), 1/2 cp chopped parsley and 1/2 cp chopped basil slowly stir in 10 oz bass ale and bring to rapid boil. Stir in 1/4 cp corn starch dissolved in 1/2 cp water to thicken. Serve over mashed potatoes. Can't be bad. Right?

I can see it now that in five years town school department officials are going to be crying for money because of the Pfizer babies". Yup, Pfizer just announced that they made an error in a fairly large distribution of birth control pills. There will be an epidemic of unwanted children, but the angst will be soothed by the large sums from legal actions. So while the local schools will be momentarily saddled with an abnormal student explosions the young students will already have their college educations paid for by Pfizer.

The Tids has often likened RI to Greece. You know, too rich of a pension system and too many public employees as a ratio to all employees. The one bright area for Greece has been tourism which could be in jeopardy as tourists shy away because of the PE riots. Well, the governor of RI has decide to keep pace here too. The only industry remaining in this little state, which at one time was the leader in worldwide manufacturing, is tourism. Last night Gov. Chafee-Lite proposed a 10% tax on meals in restaurants! Oh yeah, and the additional money will go as a pay-off to the Teacher's union which got him elected. So much for a rejuvenated RI. Where is Gina when we need her?

I was dismayed this morning when I learned that the ACLU is ok with "Kickin' em when they're down". The irrational law operation just got a judge to have removed from a school a 50 year old plaque containing a light prayer which "established nothing and coerced no one". Now they have presented the school board, which like all school boards these days is struggling, a bill for their legal costs --$173,000! Does that bother you as much as it bothers me?

Almost near: Chapter 59 continues. --Tucker had arranged the furniture in a way that he could keep busy and also keep an eye on the activity below. He considered putting a "Do not disturb" sign on the door, but worried that police checking the halls might be suspicious. He might do that tomorrow if he was still here. He always packed a little food in his luggage, becasue his little missions over the years had taught him to be prepared for anything. He felt good, but not about Audrey and now Samantha. She could be dangerous if she ever came back to earth. But, that's also for tomorrow he thought.
He took out a throw-away cell phone and sat in the easy chair by the window. The police weren't running around as much. They seemed to be standing in groups talking. He stood to get a better look. Over by the entrance, a large cop in plain clothes seemed to be holding court. The rest were listening and then moving in different directions. He noticed a pair of female legs standing next to the big guy. He bent down to see if he could see more of her. She seemed the size of Sam, but he still couldn't see her face. Move dammit, he said to himself.
He started dialing the phone. After a couple of rings, he heard a very hesitant "Hel-lo?"
"Florence, it's me Tucker Loutite. I was with Audrey the reporter. Remember".
"Oh yes, " she sounded more relaxed. "The nice man with the French name."
"Yup, that's me alright. the nice man with the French name."
"How's Audrey" She is quite the woman, isn't she. Is she your fiance?
"Almost,"
"That's nice. You seem like a nice couple."
"Florence, I'm calling becasue a I may be down to see the kids. I know how careful you are, so I didn't want to just drop in unexpectedly."
"The kids would love to see their mom. Have you heard anything about her? She must have led an awful life with that Rudy."
"Well, that might be a surprise. I might get her down there. But, don't tell the kids or anybody. As you can imagine this is a little bit of a tough situation."
"Don't worry Mr. Loutite. Just you and me. Will Audrey be with you? The kids really liked her."
"We'll see. I'll call you in a few days."
As he clicked off he saw the woman move. It was Sam. He felt a little tinge in his heart. See you soon Sam my love.

The Answer:

These are a list of celebs who have birthdays today, and frankly I have no idea who they are. Just wanted to see if you knew. Exene is a well known Punk Rocker form the band X. She also published a number of books, one of which is Adulterers Autonomous. Linus is a 47 year old actor who has been seen often on TV ( 63 episodes of Law & Order) and in the movies. The British actor was nominated for a Golden Globe for his roll as Bobby Kennedy oin the TV drama RFK. Lauren is one of those "TV Personalities" and is also known as a Celebutant, whatever that is. She came to fame in MTV's reality show Laguna beach: the Real Orange county. She is actually quite talented having written 4 novels and made noise in the fashion design biz. Bonus: The top five are Bank of Amer (+28%), Catapillar (20.4), Alcoa (17.3), Microsoft (13.8) and JPMorgan-Chase (12.2). The losers were Verizon (-6.1), P&G, Coke, Chevron and AT&T (-2.2).

Ski reports these days are a lot like politics. The trail openings and snow base sound good til you get there and and start sinking into the slush.

Deja Moo

Today's Tids 2/1 Issue #2,288

Opening Stuff:

If you are wondering about the title of Today's mess, it is an expression meaning "You may have heard this bull before." And thus begins another new month of quiet observations about the insanity, perplexities and triumphs of man...and other stuff.

February is that month in which you can say Happy Holidays and be proud of it. Or, at least be proud if you mean Happy George Washington's Birthday and Happy Abe Lincoln's B-Day. And, not just Happy Presidents day which includes several rascals and hails car dealers schemes. Of course we have Valentine's day which is sacred for romantic fools. And, procrastinators day, Feb 29...every four years. It's a month when you can really expect the cold and snow. But hopes are high since March is just around the corner with mud. So in joy the hard ground the drifts and red hearts.

I was on a long line at the Apponaug Post Office yesterday and observed that the most often requested mail priority was "Whenevah."

It is beginning to appear that the big fear in Egypt could be the emergence of the highly organized Muslim Brotherhood. This coupled with an undercurrent of growing anti-Americanism could push this radical group into a position of leadership after Mubarak leaves. In case you have missed it over the years, the Muslim Brotherhood was founded in Egypt and is known as the "Godfather of al-Qaida". This global Muslim organization is also the founder of the terror group Hamas. Think that the admin is walking on eggshells? This has the potential of being a lose-lose situation -- about as tough as it gets in diplomacy. And a time when the Government is actually relevant and earns its tax payer money.

The Question: 
Prolific Hollywood composer John Barry is dead. He wrote some of the most memorable music in film history. And won five Oscars for it. Name some of his most famous works, Oscar and other.

The Headlines:
--Florida Judge Calls Pelosi-Palooza Unconstitutional; Backs AG Lawsuits From 26 States.
--Middle East Tyrants racing To Inaugurate Reforms; Jordan's King Abdullah Fires His Cabinet.
--Obama's China Ambassador Huntsman Resigns Post; Observers See Him Has Serious GOP Prez Candidate.
--Bigger Crowds Flooding Cairo; Evacuations At Airport Ramping Up.
120 Million Americans Gird For New Large Snow Storm.
--Stock Market Looks Positive This Morning As Strong Profit Reports Continue.

Back to More Stuff:
The Lunacy of Greed Department:
The raging snow storm this Superbowl week has just closed the Dallas-Fort Worth Airport and the resultant ice could make the Sunday affair a logistical mess. And this ina so-called warm weather state. So you have to wonder what was in the NFL Boardroom coffee the day they decided that NYC's The Meadowland's Domeless Stadium would be a ge=reat day for the most important game. Or were they just blinded by dollar signs in teir eyes?

So now that it is obvious that there is little wisdom in the brains of the Top NFL'ers, it gives credence to the opinion here that upping the schedule to 18 is as dumb as it gets. Or haven't the power brokers noticed that teams are already limping to the finish line after 16 games.

Restaurant owners have to be hating the recent rash of newspaper features touting the joys of "Cheffing-it-up" at home. Cooking is fun and it certainly is a lot cheaper than eating out all of the time. And probably a lot less fattening too.

Of course, I have heard from a lot of wives who are also hating this urging of more home cooking.

There is no group in this world happier about the US involvement in the Iraq and Afghan wars that Iran! Yup, the US is spending the dough and losing the lives to keep at bay Iran's two most historic and troublesome foes, Sadaam and the Taliban. That's about as good a reason as any to leave Afghan as any, the war that origiabnlly looked great but became what Russia said it would become: Un-winnable.

Almost near: Chapter 4 continues. --"So you are Ginny's niece..."
Samantha jumped in saying, "Well, I thought she was, but I don't think she had any idea about who I was." Sam paused and turned her head to look at the boats bobbing in the harbor. "It was a terrible shock to me. My memories of her house, her cooking and good nature were so alive for me. Well, I just can't talk about it."
  She looked at Tucker and he looked back., It was an awkward moment for a man who had known this woman for about 12 minutes.
  "Ginny isn't what she used to be. She has become reclusive, and very ornery here even to eh lifelong friends. I feel bad that you went up there not knowing how much things had changed."
  Samantha smiled a little. Her chin raised up. "Thanks. I do remember people here giving me a blank look when I mentioned that I was Ginny's niece. I am so confused, I'm not sure who I am. Maybe we should just eat and tell jokes."
Tucker laughed and raised his hand, So, did you hear about the guy..."

I have about 400 perfectly good CD's and I see absolutely no need for a new system to produce music.

A lot of web sites make their money skimming of the top from the real producers. They're the new wholesalers. But they do very little other than exist with an URL.

I still think that big companies like Goldman should have used the billions they pay in bonuses to stay afloat after the risky behavior downturn instead of begging for dollars from the taxpayer. After all, isn't that the way biz is supposed to work. The excess for employee rewards is the result of having something left over after expenses or other business losses. And spare me the excuse that the bonuses are part of a promised salary. If there ain't no money, you don't get paid just like every other person who has ever worked.

The Answer: 
 John barry is often associated with the driving, haunting music behind James Bond. he started with Dr. No and gained fame when Shirley Bassey sang Goldfinger and Diamonds are forever. Barry won Oscars fro his work on "Born Free" (Maybe his most popular song), "The Lion in Winter", Out of Africa" and Dances with Wolves". He is also remebered fro Midnight Cowboy, Robin and Marion, The High Road to China and Somewhere in Time. And many more. He probably made many of our hours in the theater a lot more pleasant. The problem is that the music credits are always at the very end.

The End;
There is no truth to the rumor that in a new case of extreme nannyism the Government is planning on forcing homeowners into hiring HazMat teams when CFL's (Compact Fluorescent Lights) are broken. This GW Bush initiated intrusion will also require that families move to a Motel for a day. or until the yellow tape is removed from the front door. Doncha love progress?

And, it has been learned that tomorrow's Ground Hog observations may have to be postponed as Punxitawny officials can't locate Phil's den in snow.