Well, there's still the comics.

Today's Tids Issue 2,218
Opening Stuff:

This weekend looks like prime leaf time around here. Actually, there just isn’t anything bad about this time of year. The seniors have all moved to Florida, so the golf courses are playing fast again. I’m enjoying the comfort of corduroy pants as I crunch leaves on cool forest paths. The ocean glistens like a lover’s eyes. The air invigorates a body emerging from summer sluggishness. All in all, life is pretty fantastic.

Except for Juan Williams, who’s sudden boot by NPR is proving once again that the national gang of liberal intelligentsia are all for the 1st Amendment as long as what you are saying supports their beliefs.

When watching our current Congress at work, we should be taking a lesson from Mexico, a country that has seen an incredibly rapid deterioration after the criminals were allowed to run wild.

And…speaking of politicians, a magician is a “super duper”.

In addition to saving the future for pensioners, Sarkozy’s action on retirement age may have additional collateral benefits. For instance, the rude and culturally poisonous Lady Gaga has cancelled her Paris concerts in some kind of brain dead reactionary sympathy move. The French don’t know how lucky they are to be spared from that glitzy monotony.

The Question:
TV Guide just listed their favorite all time TV Families. They were in order Huxtables, Simpsons, Tanners (Full House), Sopranos, Partridges, Fishers (6 Feet Under), Bluths (Arrested Deelopment), Keatons (Fam Ties), Bunkers, Bradys, Conners (Roseanne), Seavers (Growing Pains), Waltons, Walkers (Bors & Sis), Cleavers, Jackson/Drummend (Diff Strokes), Ewings (Dallas), Barones (Raymond), Pritchetts (Mod Fam and Jeffersons. In a limited poll, viewers rated their favorites. Which of the above do you think came out on top? Name a show you think they missed.

The Headlines:

--Marlets Zig-Zag Waiting For G-20.
--Economic Growth Gage Falls To Six Week Low.
--Anonymous Person deposits $10,000 In Crisp Dollars In Memorial Donor’s Box And WTC Site.
--Cholera Outbreak Hits Rural Haiti; 142 Dead.
--Gulf Corals In Oil Spill Zone Appear Healthy.
--0-Man and MonicaMan Are Running Wildly Across Country To Save Out Of Control Congress.
--Verizon Profits Drop 25%; Beats WS Estimates; Investers Await Addition Of I-Phone..

Back to More Stuff:
If you have been watching the earnings report you might think our economy is based on companies that keep you idle, over feed you and put you back together fall apart. And you would be right. The bellwether industries this quarter are Electronics-Wireless-Computer-Internet, Fast Food and Health Care Products and Services.

Pakistan’s successful blockade of critical US supply transports hasn’t gone unnoticed by our deep pocket’s Congress and Admin. The US has increased military aid by $2,000,000,000! What a country.

Remember when Will Rogers said "I only know what I read in the papers"? Jeez, would he be in  trouble now!

Think about how much good the celebrities could do if they really understood the facts instead of reacting to some emotional artificial stimulus. Basically it just proves once again that actors are just good at reading other people’s lines. And these days their lines are being written by by people who don’t seem to like what America has been.

How come the pictures of shouting people I see in the French pension protest look like college students?

Silly State laws Department:
In Montana, it is against the law to have sheep in your truck cab without a chaperone! I wonder what that’s all about?


Reading between the Lines Movie Reviews:
--The trailer for Clint Eastwood’s latest “Hereafter” makes it appear as though it is entirely a Matt Damon vehicle. In fact it is three stories – Damon a psychic is looking for lava and a normal life without death; Cecille, a French TV reporter, is haunted by her near death experience; And Frankie McLaren is a foster child morning the sudden death of his twin brother. The stories eventually come together. You will find it slow and somber at times, but the end is uplifting in this movie that is spiritual and tends to support an afterlife. But then, what would you expect from an 80 year old director.
--I don’t like prison movies, so there is a high degree of probability that I won’t see “Stone” starring Edward Norton as a tough guy prisoner and Robert DeNiro as his very religious parole officer. For some reason, Norton has his sexy wife seduce DNiro thinking it will get him out of jail sooner. The religious DeNiro bends to the attraction quickly. Norton has regrets. It’s actually kind of an irritable movie.
--Woody Allen’s new little sex comedy “You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger” looks good to me. It has an all star cast including Anthony Hopkins, Josh Brolin, Naomi Watts, Gemmma Jones and Antonio Banderas among others. Watts and Anna Friel look for love in all the wrong places. The film which opens and closes with song “When You Wish Upon A Star” shows how people’s wishes for romance don’t always turn out to be the sweet dreams they had hoped for.

In the Town of King NC (Pop 6,000) the ACLU acting on complaint by one citizen got an injunction against the display of a Christian Flag at a veteran’s memorial. 63 year old Ray Martini, an Air Force Vet, was irate. He decided to put the flag back out there. He then set up camp beneath it to guard it. He has received food and blankets from towns across NC and from many other states. The town is now awash with fluttering flags. The same Christian flag hanging from hair salons, barbecue joints, general stores—well, just about anywhere in the town. Except government buildings. I’m wondering if it is the same single citizen who when living in East Greenwich had a seventy year old memorial to a good doctor, a cross, removed from a triangle at an intersection. Send a note to Ray!

I was surprised to see the cover of the October 4 Time Magazine with the feature story headline: “How the first nine months shape the rest of your life.” Could this traditionally abortion supporting editorial staff be having a change of heart?

In the first line of a predominantly anti-Republican rant in the Providence Journal’s editorial support of Barney Frank, they say: “Recovery from the financial crisis requires ‘intelligent’ leadership. The entire editorial reads like something you might hear from Lady Gaga or Rosie.

In case you missed it about Barney’s Babies, Fannie and Freddie, it was reported this morning that the terrible twosome needs another $215 Billion. I love that intelligent leadership.

The Answer:
The two that “the folks” seemed to like best and which were significantly ahead of the rest were The Huxtable’s and The Keaton’s of Family Ties. Also doing quite well were the Cleavers, Barone’s and Seaver’s, and they were followed by the Partridges, Bunkers, Brady’s, Walton’s and Conner’s. I think they left out My Three Sons and 8 is Enough. And, if you are really old you might throw in Father Knows Best! All the rest were so-so or worse.

The End:
If the press stopped following ideologies and started thinking again, we might have a chance of getting this government back in shape. If this formerly august group honestly interpreted the truth of candidate statements, ignored blatant dirty tricks and stopped being blind cheerleaders, maybe intelligent people would start running for office again.

Some of these Republican and Tea Party candidates say some of the dumbest things I have ever heard.

Maybe soccer is bad for you.

Today's Tids Issue 2,152
Opening Stuff:

I sense that many in this country are trying create a feeling of national guilt because we are not a strong soccer country in a world where soccer is king. Let’s see…The US is the most robust, singularly successful economy of the last 200 years. We are the freest country that ever existed. And we were never particularly good at soccer. In fact in recent years where soccer is showing some gains in popularity, the basic economy is changing intrinsically for the worse and freedoms are being chipped away on a daily basis. Maybe soccer is baaad.

I’m beginning to think I’m naïve. An intellectual vacuum. People keep on telling me that they are giving up the newspaper because there’s nothing in there any more. Yet I spend hours reading it each morning and come away fully satisfied with the use of my time. What do these people know what’s missing that I can’t see? It’s disturbing to feel so inadequate.

God, how awful was that flash flood that swept in upon sleeping campers and took the lives of 16 to 40 souls who were enjoying the calm and comfort of open skies and uncluttered forests next to a once rippling stream. How horrible. My heart aches.

The Mexican drug cartels are appearing to be considerably more dangerous and vicious than the Taliban. And, they are killing out of control with in inches of the US border.

The Question:
Here‘s a few questions for today. 1. Who was the first TV couple to be seen in bed together? 2. What state has the highest percentage of people who walk to work? 3. What was the frist novel ever written on a typewriter? 4. Each King in a deck of cards represents a different king in history. Name the king for each suit. 5. And finally, what is the most popular name requested by boat owners for their boats?

The Headlines:
--Moody's Downgrades Greece Debt To Junk Status.
--US Markets Up Early; Contracting In Afternoon..
--Pilot Strike Forces Spirit Airlines To cancel All flights Through Thursday; Thousands Stranded.
--BP Board Meeting On Dividend Action.
--Ethinic Violence In Kyrgystan Escalates to Levels Unheard Of Even By Kyrgystanians.
--US Discovers Over A trillion In Mineral Assets On Afghan Territory.; Could Be Boost for Economy There.
--Sausage-man Singer Jimmy Dean Dead At 81.
--Celtics Win; Lead NBA Series 3-2.
--World Cup Security Guards Riot Over Wages; SA Armed Police Called In..

Back to More Stuff:

A local sports writer summed our current state in a America nicely: “Nothing unravels a society faster than the lack of jobs.”

A leaked White House document indicates attempts by admin lackeys to make an end run around Presidential promises that helped him get the Health Care monster passed. This admin and its leader are sounding more and more like a group that will promise anything to get to point “A” and then work to change it to get where they always wanted to be in the first place. And that lack of trust is not comforting.

There was an omission in the email delivered Tids that was in the todaystids.blogspot.com location: “The Tids word of the day is ‘Caring’. It’s good for two hearts.”

The women at the local bar called the crude postal worker junk male.

There is no question in my mind that in the coming years the major organic farming crop will be medical marijuana. Don’t be surprised if you find it at your local Farmers Market next to the peony bushes. Farmer’s daughter baker types will be hawking marijuana laced chocolate chip cookies for hospital patient gifts. I love it when good things happen and it all comes together.

I used to think that lady Gaga dressed up to look weird for promotional promises. I’m finding that she doesn’t need to dress up to look or behave weird. In Fact she may have taken celebrity arrogance to the greatest heights yet. Just recently her out of control “Me” insanity after an American Idol gig and during a Mets game has proven conclusively that she is indeed from another planet and doesn’t need bazaar costumes to prove it.

We didn’t have Lady Gaga before soccer became popular.

There is one big problem I see coming with all of this Big Time College Athletics Conference Expansion. As the colleges destroy tradition, and the competition for the big bucks gets more vicious, and as more and more colleges break more and more rules to get a head, and more sanctions are delivered, putting more and more colleges on probation….will there be anybody left to play in these ridiculous outsized leagues? What a mess.

Through the Same Eyes: Chapter 78. –Thanks’ Henry I thought as I drove over to my house. Thnanks a lot!“Why don’t you have coffee with your friend Kent and see what you can learn", he asked me. That’s like telling an alcoholic to guard your vodka stash. I don’t think I can do it Henry. I’m getting scared Henry. Can’t you see it in me? You’re the detective. I just sat listening to the hum of the motor as I blindly drove.
Then it came. My shoulders shuddered. My chest heaved. I started crying uncontrollably.
I dove to the side of the road and and let the tears flow. All alone.

Red Sox player Beltre is batting .333 at the plate. But he’s batting a thousand in the crippling of fellow players department. Outfielders Elsbury and Hermida are out with cracked ribs for extended periods after running into the third baseman. The infielder is generally supposed to give way to the onrushing out fielders who have a better perspective of the hit ball. Maybe it’s an English-Spanish translation problem.

I seem to be going through a lot of fishing line lately. Unfortunately it’s to tie the rose to the trellis on my roof.

Jessica Watson, 16 yo. Australian who sailed singled handed around the world was hailed a hero upon her return. But here in the Nanny state outraged non-sailors with a typewriter (Ooops computer) are calling for the parents scalps. On board the French fishing boat that rescued her, Abby went back to her blog. She sounds calm and under control and I have to love her line: “Within a few minutes of being on board the fishing boat, I was already getting calls from the press. I don’t know how they got the number but it seems everybody is eager to pounce on my story now that something bad has happened.” Then commented on the press and others guessing reasons for the problem, including her age. “…Since when does age create large waves and storms.” She went on to say I was ready for it, I was prepared for it, and it came. http://soloround.blogspot.com/

“Duh Headline of the Week Department:
Double Duh! For this one in Parade Mag: “Should suspected terrorists be allowed to buy weapons.” Excuse me? How about “Should you say no to Hannibal Lector if he asks to give you a hickey?”

The Answer: 1. Fred and Wilma Flintstone were first to snuggle under th covers. Does this mean that everything we see on South Park will be come common for the rest of programs? 2. Alaska 3. Tom Sawyer was the first novel ever typed. But that shouldn’t be surprising since Twain’s home at the time was Hartford Ct, the typewriter capital of the world. 4. Spades – King David, Hearts – Charlemagne, Clubs – Alexander the Great, Diamonds – Julius Caesar. Obama is the joker. 4. “Obsession” is the most popularly requested name for boats.

The End:
If you try to ruch and do too many things at once in the morning, you’ll probably drop your toothbrush in the toilet bowl. Have a grrrr-eat day!