Dreariness.

 

Today's Tids Issue 4,897

Onward to May:

 

The next time you get this mess we’ll be 3 days into May. We will have missed May Day, Kentucky Derby Day and the first gleams of a May sunshine day. So I’m saying Happy May today in the last days of the month that began as a fool, fooled us into thinking that summer was ear. Welcome May, the revival month, where summer enthusiasts seem to taste the warmth to come. It’s filled with special days like those for Moms and those for remembering the heroes gone. Ad we celebrate great thoroughbreds and pagan and labor union festivals on May One. May fifth always brings back one of the great all time puns. But I like may. These trees are all out and the beaches are open, and June is just around the corner. And, I really like June.

 

Charles Schultz said this through his character Franklin: “One you are over the hill; you pick up speed.” Never stop running.

 

The Question:

What are the five greatest puns of all time? Bonus: What is the all-time great Pun for May 5?

 

The Headlines:

--Stocks Bucking Headwinds; Amazon Hits All-Time Earrings High; Twitter Earnings Fall Even As Facebook And Snap Earnings Come in Strong

--45 People Die, 150 Injured In Jewish Festival Stampede Israel; Car Bomb Kills 30 At Afghan Guesthouse.

--Labor Inflation For Restaurants Is Here And Now, And Becoming A Major Problem.

--Despite Fears Of New Taxes And Inflation, Economy Observers Ae Still Bullish About Strength Of Overall Economy.

--Kenya Anti-Vaccine Doctor Dies Of Covid.

--Eurozone Suffering Double Dip Recession As Pandemic Continues.

 

The $15 Min wage bonanza is coming at a time when companies who lived frugally enough to make it through Covid are now faced with finding ways to maintain profitability with these new cost factors. It’s a squeeze. the big panini!

 

This is one of those days where I think and I think and I look and I look and nothing of much value appears on my screen.

 

Basically, what economic Academia is saying about our economy is that it is strong enough to survive Joe Bide policies that could dampen a lesser economy.

 

There will be a point in time when restaurants may price themselves out of existence as uncontrollable costs continue to mount.

 

Are we headed for an Autocracy? Biden mentioned the word in his speech Wednesday. It is defined as, “A system of government by one person with absolute power.” A one-party Congress and the new era of accepting executive orders unquestioned could lead to that. Especially if the Exec orders are full of free money for citizens. The good news is that Joe B Isn’t storing enough to be Autocratic.

Amazon just posted amazing profits for the quarter. Is this one of those Covid windfall stocks to watch as poetically problematic as the need to online diminishes as vaccinations increase?

 

The Answer:

Nobody will agree with these answers. I don’t even think I agree with them:

--“We must all hang together or assuredly we shall all hang separately.” Benjamin Franklin at sign of Declaration Of Independence.

--“Denial is not a river in Egypt. “Mark Twain

--If we arm all the teachers, will the Librarians get silencers?

--The only thing flat-earthers fear, is sphere itself.

--I recently started a business building yachts in my attic. Sails are going through the roof.

--If you can’t see the cheese, it’s pasteurized.

By the way, some of the great puns acknowledged by historians were written by Shakespeare. But I wasn’t smart enough to get them, so I’m leaving them out.

Bonus:

     Most people don’t know that back in 1912, Hellmann’s mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York.    This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York. The ship hit an iceberg and sank, and the cargo was forever lost.     The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day.      The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as Sinko de Mayo.

 

Shoot me!

 

Have great weekend, E-v-e-r-y-b-o-d-y!!