A funny thing happened on the way to the Coliseum.

Today's Tids Issue 2,780
Opening Stuff:

"MI raccontava una barzelletta sul politici rubare e nessuno rise. Era vero." Are you laughing yet? Well, one of the biggest jokes around these days is the Italian political situation. The opening of this Tid is one of Comedian Candidate Beppe Grillo's jokes, one that got him into deep trouble, banned from TV. Deep trouble that inspired him to run for the Italian Prime Minister on the platform "Gettare tutti i brucia fuori" -- "Throw all the bums out". Of course, everybody was laughing at such an idea -- Berlusconi, Anti Bunga-Bunga candidate Bersani and the Communist party. Now the world is laughing at Italian politicians. "Beppi Boom", as the campaign became known, generated 1/3 of the votes for Grillo, throwing the Italian Government into disarray. Hilarious, gut busting total confusion. Italy is leaderless with little hope of consolidating the factions into a governable majority. After the election, sentiment for throwing them all out is getting even stronger, just as Giuseppi Piero "Beppi" Grillo says. Oh yeah, the joke that got him tossed of the tube: "I was telling a joke about this politician* stealing and nobody laughed. It was true." *(Socialist Bellino Craxi)

The thing that scares me most about the future of the world is this irrational trend towards pureed vegetables.

For all those who have missed the beginning of the TV show The Americans on Fx, there will be an "Americans Marathon" starting this Friday. Check your local listings.

The Question:
Travel&Leisure has announced the Best US Steakhouses. What do oyu think they are?

The Headlines:
--Bob Woodward Says White House Threatened Him Ahead Of Report Criticizing Obama Statements; Officials Rankled Over Slams Against WH Narrative On Sequestration; "You will Regret Doing This," He Was Told.
--Lew Approved As Treasury Chief; Senate Panel Delays CIA Nominee Bennen Conformation.
--US Gov To Give $40 Million In Food, Medical Aid To Syrian Rebels.
--Army Private In WikiLeaks Case Pleads Not Guilty.
--Another Car Bomb In Iraq Kills 11.
--Italian President Giorgio Napolitano Says Old Governemtn Still In Place; Says Don't Panic Over Current Gridlock.
--CEO Cook Promises New Exciting Announcements From Apple; Stock Declines; Observers Say Wristwatch, TV Could Be New Products.
--JC Penny On Last Legs After Worst Year In History; Turn-Around Strategy Eating Company Alive.

A stock market observer says that the count down for a market correction has started as the lemmings pile on stocks at the peak. Take it for what it is worth. But, it does seem to be a good cautioning advisory. The market is approaching the 2000/01, 2007/08 and 2011 peaks that all produced "Cliffs" we really can't live with.. The Greedometer is flashing, slow down.

Pat on Back, Department:
The Tids Short Story Editor was selected as a winner in the "Newport Life Magazine Annual Writer's Contest. The story, printed in the March-April Issue, is about a hard-bitten, professional commercial fisherman who finds, surprisingly, comfort away from home in a small restaurant.

I have always been a little perplexed by the phrase, "Rules of War."

The rise of Cyber Threats has generated a like rise in US Government agencies trying to do something about it. In fact, there are already about 8 full fledged operations hiring the brightest geeks available, from the Defense Department to Homeland Security to the FBI and CIA. And probably the Agricultural Department too. Guess what? Comon', you can guess. It's easy. It's what many big Government agencies do  -- avoid communicating with each other. Think about how much money could be saved and how many solutions to problems could be created if Government agencies actually shared information. The anti Cyber Ops are brand new, and already they have fallen into the big Government trap -- protect "your" territory at all costs.

Mayor Bloomberg of NYC is the symbol of where the USA does not want to go. Fortunately the real intelligent people of the US reside in the broad expanse between the coasts.

Then there is Michelle Obama talking about overweight kids again. I mean, the First Lady is probably a pretty nice person. And, I think she could do a lot, maybe even foster Mother Teresa type inspiration walking amongst the poorer of our communities preaching responsibility, learning. Teaching about basics of living smartly, which in turn would surely achieve her goal or better nutrition, and I suspect a  whole lot more. It's that whole lot more that could improve families going forward, reduce random crime and killing. She really could do it. She couold be the star in the White House. I actually believe that.

If you have studied Cheetos like I have, you know that bags bought in different stores can taste quite a bit different. It really is quite discouraging when plopping down in soft couch cushions with new bag, deliriously looking forward to that special crunch an unique tangy taste -- and then finding you bought the bag at the wrong store. God, I hate that.

Why am I more often than not disappointed by the highly touted Hollywood's best movies. Maybe if I watched them before the Hoopla, I wouldn't be as disappointed. Or, maybe I'm just a strange duck.

Maybe if we fell off a cliff once, we wouldn't have to go through the histrionics for every damn approaching decision. Maybe the Prez and congress would just do it quietly. Maybe they would just do their jobs. Or, has the process of government become so dominated by Publicists that it is practically inable to govern. Impossible for a strong leader ot stand up unfettered by handlers. Where's Beppi Grillo when you need him.

Wait til Stephen Colbert sees the Italian comedy show. Colbert against Hilary. Yikes!

The Conscience: Chapter 15 continues.
  After a good phone conversation with Evvy, she seemed proud of my progress, I grabbed a couple of nips from my favorite hotel room amenity and headed down stairs for breakfast, which turned out to be amazing. I put a little of the Vodka in my orange juice, the perfect companion for eating alone, especially since I couldn't read Italian news papers. It also smoothed out my brain still cloudy from last night. Life for me has become all about balance.
   I had dressed in a nondescript outfit that I figured would make me look like any of the other working Genoans I had seen yesterday. My object was to observe the daytime comings and goings at that warehouse. I had thought about that mysterious place a lot last night while anesthetizing myself at the hotel bar. Mainly, why would Angelica be sneaking around her own company's building. After a couple of brandy's my creativity started to become hysterical, and after years of experience I knew it was time to stop thinking before I did something really stupid, and in this case, probably dangerous. So, I let my mind focus on Angelica, who was becoming harder and harder avoid. She was a beautiful woman, and there was something about her that, that...well it's hard to describe.
   I bought a local paper for cover as I arrived in the area near my quarry. A coffee shop with delicious looking pastries beckoned me to a tan[bel that just happened to provide a perfect view of Biglietto Boats. The waitress, smiled as she brought the dark black coffee and something really intriguing that looked sweet and delectable. As I munched and sipped, almost drooling from taste buds under attack, feigning intense interest in the paper, I saw a severe looking guy run in, all agitated. He landed a couple of tables away, where he just stood, hovering, ready to explode over an old grizzled appearing guy had been sitting there quietly doin just about what I had been doing. He didn't semed happy about the appearance of the intense companion. The intruder, dressed perfectly in an expensive looking suit, I know expensive suits because they are opposite of what I wear, reached down and pulled away the old man's paper and flipped a few pages, pointing to something around page  seven. He became animated, while the old guy continued to sit calmly. Finally he put up his hands as if saying slow down. The suit stopped jabbering and sat, as the older guy began talking softly.
  I took my paper and went to the page they were discussing. There in black and white was a big picture of a bombed out Bernard Yacht factory under the headline, "Stati Uniti Barca Builder bombardato". Bombardato! I looked over at the twosome who were still talking quietly. I ducked my head as I saw the suit's head scanning the area.
  
The Answer:
I suspect I'll never get to any of these, but you who travel may like to keep the list handy: Carnevino, LV: Cut, Beverly Hills: St. Elmo Steak House, Indianapolis: Charlie Palmer, DC; Killen's Steakhouse, Pearland Tx; Kevin Rathbun, Atlanta; Urban Farmer, Portland Or; Prime One Twelve, Miami, Fl; Peter Luger, Brooklyn NY; House of Prime Rib, SF; Pappas Bros., Dallas; Mooo, Boston; Gibson's bar & Steakhouse, Chi; Barkal Prime, Philly; Murray's, Minn; Churrascos, Hou; Jess & Jims, KC; Keens, NYC; Oak SH, Charleston SC; Five O'Clock,Milwaukee; The Prime Rib, Balt; Jeff Ruby's Cinn, David Burkes, Chi; Berns, Tampa; Lonesome Dove, Fort Worth; Cattleman's, Okla City; Roast, Det. 22 Bowens, Newport. I just threw in that last one.

Know any good Italian jokes?

Save your lira.

Basking.

Today's Tids Issue 2.779

Opening Stuff:

 

Occasionally somebody pats you on the back and says nice job. And, it feels great.

I really like the line-up of Window's 8 Lenova Laptops, and the removable Tablet. Microsoft lives.

Did you hear about the guy who is addicted to brake fluid? He says he can stop any time.

The Question:
What are the Ten Best Saint Patrick's Day Parades?

The Headlines:
--Hagel Finally Sworn In As Defense Chief; Confirmed By Senate 58-41.
--Stocks Up; Durable Goods Orders (Minus Aircraft) Strong; Housing Gains.
--Pope Speaks Of Rough Seas Ahead In Emotional Farewell; 150,000 Stand, Cheer - "Benedict, Benedict" - In Awe Of Departing Pope.
--200 US Companies Ask SC To Support Gay Marriage.
--Syrian Mortar Lands In Israel Controlled Golan Heights.
--SC To hear Arguments On Voter ID's.
--Shooter Kills 3, Wounds 7 In Swiss Factory; Typically, Swiss Officials Deny That It Could Ever Happen In Their Country.
--Iran Says They Are Upbeat After Nuke Talks With West; Other Countries Not So Positive.

I often rail against people who try to "improve" perfect foods. Last night it was home made chocolate chip cookies, and Almond was the distinctive new flavor, at least acording this humble pallet. Frankly, I don't like almond flavoring in anything, and certainly not in God's cookie.

I think one of the problems that the Post Office faced as a business, is that it was too difficult to train customers away from the way it had been traditionally used, too much of a leap for many to use their services differently. The PO had to maintain the inefficiency of the Government blanket. And that is expensive.

Speaking of the Daytona 500, why would anybody really want to "sit on the pole"?

One of the things I dislike about modern technology is that when intrigued by a home page headline, a click to the full story site, invariably opens a video which I am forced to watch, instead of reading text. Cool that they have video, but reading is so much quicker and comprehensive. With no voice disturbing the concentration of a rambling mind.

Unless, of course, when the video is recording a shark attack.

Could Africa eventually become the al-Qaida Continent?

Oscar Wilde once said, "I find American Beer a bit like having sex in a canoe. It's f***ing close to the water." Even as a NA drinker, I know that US beers are far inferior to European or even Canada beers. And the the big difference is wateryness. So give me body, away from the canoe, as they say.

Did you hear about the the guy who was fired from the orange juice plant because he couldn't concentrate?

Did you see that headline above about the workplace Murders in Switzerland? My comments about Swiss official heads in the sand weren't as idle as they may appear. Several years ago, we were in the capitol city Bern, when we were accosted by a couple of con men who hoisted 300 Swiss Francs from our money reserve. And, we had no idea what was happening until later when we discovered the missing money. So we reported it to the clerk in our Hotel, and you know what they did? They laughed a little and said nobody gets robbed in Switzerland.

The Conscience: Chapter 15.

   "Hi hon,"

   "You sound sober."

   "Of course, it's only 8:00 in the morning over here."

   "Usually you've been drunk by seven at home." Jeff laughed freely like he hadn't in a long time.

   "I think this assignment has been good for me."

   "I'm worried about you."

   "You don't have to worry quite as much as normal. I really am getting better...at least for the past day and a half."

   "That's not why I worried. Have you heard about that explosion at your employer's company? It's all over the papers up here in New York and on the cable news channels -- their juicy visual of the day. It  looks awful and I hear several people were killed." Jeff's glance moved towards the window and he stood to look down the quarter mile to the waterfront. His head nodding at his wife's words. He had dismissed that from his mind. Maybe a reason why he didn't need a drink this morning. "And, I was thinking that maybe it had something to do with your negotiations. Call it wife's instinct."

   Jeff just sat there for a few seconds and looked now at the mini-bar.

"Don't worry," he started, "My talks here are really going well." Then he remembered why he was snooping around in that pitch black warehouse, and felt that familiar gnawing in his stomach. "I'll call Jason, and see what they know. Yesterday, he told me it was just an accident." Of course, he knew it wasn't and so did Angelica.

   "Well keep me posted. I miss you." Then  she added. "I even miss your inebriated state."

   "How are the kids doing?" Evvy now entered into a family discussion as though nothing else was going on. Jeff enjoyed the familiarity of it, but he could not stop thinking about where he should be going today. He was waiting for Angelica to call. She would know what I should do. Am I putting too much trust in my adversary. Is that part of their plan?

The Answer:

This list is from USNews Travel and was put together by a guy named "Hamooda Shami" so take it for what it's worth. I don't know if it is because the town produced so many damn Kennedy's, but Boston is rated Number One. 2 is Chicago followed by NYC, Savannah Ga, San Fran, Dublin O, Philadelphia, Hot Springs Ark, Scranton Pa and Kansas City Mo. Dublin? And Hot Springs is a baby on the list of parades with a start date of 2004 and Elvis in green as the major attraction. get me outta there. Actually, I just walk about 100 steps to one of the oldest and good enough for anybody Newport Ri Parade. Where great Irishmen and women abound. Where Hibernian Hall is City Hall. Give me a bagpipe and I'm a happy guy.

So, I don't know about you, but I'm just languishing and enjoying the hell out of it.

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John Kerry made me do it.

Today's Tids Issue 2,778

Opening Stuff:

 

It's one of those mornings. Too damn hot for February. Yet beautiful. Springlike. The expanse of our beautiful, majestic Bay is quiet today, soothing, as only quiet seas can be. Calm, with a warming sun glimmering off small waves rolling in with the changing tide. Carving images around Buoys as they flow, lazily drifting along; Going nowhere. On the shore the wavelettes are breaking with tiny crests, rolling rivulets up through rocks or splashing gently upon sandy beaches. Reflections like jewels gleam on the landscape. Yet, as I look into the glistening light, bouncing, I don't see crisp salt water reflecting the sun. I see beer bottles, soda cans, remnants of human irresponsibility. Reminders of man's frailties and disinterest. Will it ever stop.

How far will our President and henchmen for go to create havoc to preserve his agenda? Well, it has been reported by AP that the admin has ordered field offices of the USICE to review costs of holding illegal immigrant detainees with respect to projected budgets. Many Illegal aliens accordingly have been released from prison, with spokes people saying there won't be enough money to keep them after cuts. Are they nuts?

I'm reminded by Brookins and Cassett of the famous western coffee house of yore, Pony Espresso.

The Question:
Name the last ten Secretary's of State (Not including those 5 designated as  "Acting") before John Kerry.

The Headlines:
--18 Tourists Killed In Egyptian Hot Air Balloon Crash.
--Right Side Of SC Supports Argument Of Obama Admin On Surveillance Law; Law Would Allow Wiretaps On Some International Communications.
--Palestinians Lob Misseile From Gaza Into Israel; Say Israel Killed Palestine Soldier.
--Italy In Governmental Dilemma; rest Of World Bewildered.
--Blizzard Expect To Assault Chicago At Rush Hour.
--Big Powers Offer Iran Limited Sanction Relief If Iran Halts Controversial Part Of Nuke Program.
--Morsi Opponents To Boycott Parliamentary Elections.
--Bernanke Defends Actions; Suggests Risk In Budget Cuts.

I learned a little something about writng a screenplay this past weekend. I learned that often the screenwriter doesn't write dialogue, but lays out visual scenes that defines characters and storylines. For instance, I'm imagining this scene, with cameras hovering over street corners in drones. Into each corner runs a person from the North and another person from the East, each carrying a foot high pile of papers. As they reach the corner simultaneously -- Sa-mack! -- they run head long into each other, go topsy-turvy, and papers fly. A scene that is repeated similarly on street corners throughout the city. the running people scurrying to pick up papers until once again, they each have a stack a foot high. They turn and run South and West only to be met once again by people with foot high stacks of papers converging on teh same corner. Once again the papers fly, and once again the  papers are re-stacked. Finally after multiple crashes and restackings, somebody  the decides to cross the street and the rest do the same. Now they proceed safely with their foot high stacks. As the camera pulls back, we see buresucrats and lawyers emerging from marble building enclosed canyons, uniting as one mass moving towards the US Capitol, each carrying foot high stacks of by now totally unrelated papers. One by one they stoop, and lay there sacred treasure the feet of a woman. As the camera pulls away, we see a woman spreading her arms and saying, Finally, the Affordable Health Care Act.

Is Harry Reid Writing John Kerry's Speeches, Department.
In a speech to German students yesterday, Kerry says, "Americans have the right to be stupid". Of course, these remarks were in the context of a talk he was giving about the precious freedoms of America, speech and religion. He was emphasizing that Americans will go to any length to protect those freedoms, including allowing a dumbing down of the public. Is that a good thing?

No, it isn't Harry Reid, it's Joe Biden using Harry Reid's logic Writing for Kerry.

The almighty Geek. That powerful wizard of "0's" and "1's".  That stony intellectual who can't explain what he or she does in words that humans understand. For a decade or so, Geek has been used to explain the odd group of non-mainstream people, most often associated with computer expertize, and generally for people defined simply as too smart for me, and I'll avoid them  at all  costs. Unless I'm a sensual woman who particularly  likes socially inept billionaires. It is a pejorative that has become crown. But, yes there's always a but...once was the Geek was a lowly human being. Geekdom was not always so proud. Originally the "Geek" was a traveling circus side show freak -- a variant of Geck which meant fool, dupe, simpleton. Geek shows which became popular in the 20th century had the Individual standing in the center of the ring surrounded by chickens. This "Geek" would chase the chickens, catch one, bite off the head and eat it. The audience would go wild! In the 1947 Film Noir classic, Nightmare Alley, Tyrone Power would up an alcoholic geek biting off the heads of chickens. Who knew.

Is there a worm in the Apple? Macs have achieved critical mass, it seems, where it has become more intriguing for hackers; Intriguing enough to turn their mischievous eyes away from their historic mother-lode, Microsoft. Which, I suspect would be good for Norton, McAfee and AVG. We live in an interconnected world.

I love Peggy Noonan's moniker for this administration, "Freak Out government". The original Chicken Little admin. When the sky is falling, somebody has to fix it, and of course all of those skies that may fall in the future. Of course, we do have to prepare for that, don't we my feathery cabinet -- Henny Penny, Chicken Licken, Goosey Poosey, Cocky Locky, Ducky Lucky, Gander Lander, Trukey Lurkey and of course sittin' and waitin'...Foxy Woxy. "Freak Out Government". I love it.

The Answer:
--Well getting Hillary was the easy one. I guess you all would have said Condy Rice before her. Continuing backwards, we have Colin Powell, Madeleine Albright, Warren Christopher, Laurence Eagleburger, James Baker, George Shultz, the next in line for the presidency Al Haig. Ed Muskie and Cyrus Vance. The next five were Kissinger, Rogers, Rusk, Herter and John Foster dulled. Now be honest, who thought first of Lawrence Eagleburger...even after you saw his name. must be a typo.

Hmm, let's see, a Freak Out government with a population free to be stupid -- I'd say you have a recipe for decline.

Do you actually believe that the Founding fathers thought it a good idea for future Americans to pursue stupidity.

Novel, The Conscience returns tomorrow.

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Lucky Tids Issue today; Play sevens.

Today's Tids Issue 2,777

Opening Stuff:

 

It's nearly impossible to recreate a perfect spontaneous moment.

Ah, the Oscars. A gathering of cultural icons. A spectacle. A mess. And a Red Carpet that's much too long. Oh yeah and that voice that kept screeching and screeching and screeching. Those mike poked stars who tried to mutter ever so clever answers. Are we having fun yet? How about all those comments about male star tuxedos. Inane. Then we went inside where the gowns and black suits were all atwitter and liltingly happy. Until, "This is the story of a man fighting to get back his woman, who's been subjected to unthinkable violence. Or as Chris Brown and Rihanna call it, a date movie." Oooooooo, murmured the audience. I laughed a the accuracy of the barb. Ok, MacFarlane was only ok. --Captain Kirk's appearance looked like a High School production. --I kept asking my self during the 007 tribute, when is something going to happen?. --They left off Andy Griffith and Larry Hagman in the Memorial segment. --Adele was the best moment of the show. --You can't help but like Jennifer Lawrence. --At least Nicholson didn't drop trow when introducing FLOTUS. --The two biggest presenter messes were MCarthy/Rudd and the Avengers who either stepped upon or forgot their lines. --I never get into best dressed discussions, but I thought Haille Berry's outfit was perfect. --Music was the theme, but I didn't feel it. Maybe because I fell asleep before the good stuff happened. Right? There was good stuff? Right?

Actual sign seen last week on entrance door to local Wal-Mart: "Did you leave your child in the car?" Civilization hasn't progressed that far from the caveman days, has it?

"Fries or salad?" That was the question. Fries or salad. Salad or fries. Fries. Salad. Hmmm. I think I'll pick fries. The good news is that I am finally able to override my Catholic guild at any moment. This is important. This morning, I learned that a study reported in The Journal of Nutrition, Health and Aging, found that once people have passed the 75 year mark "A diet high in sugar and fat doesn't make a difference -- and overly restrictive diets may not improve health at all." In addition, the study said that mild overweight may be a benefit to healthy living for the older folks. Pinch me!

The Question:
Double "Q" day -- 1. So now we can add Seth MacFarlane to the list. Name the five Oscar night hosts with the longest durations. Bonus: Name the Ten Richest Cities in USA based on average percentage of households over $191,469 (That is bottom of Top 5% of national income distribution.) .

The Headlines:
--Stocks Rise On New Optimism For A Faster Growing Global Economy.
--Sequestration Nit Picking Dominating Beltway Burgs.
--Bob Woodward Is saying The Admin Is Pushing Out Lies About The Looming Cuts
--Syria Says It's Ready To Talk.
--US High School Graduation Up Significantly.
--New Winter Storm Bearing Down On Plains States.
--Oscar Winners: Argo, Spielberg, Lewis, Lawrence, Waltz, Hathaway.

Leading up to the big night on the West Coast, we had the wonderful Accenture Match Play Golf Tournament a little Southeast of LaLa. It was a nice win for Matt Kucher, a good guy.

Maybe the most significant announcement of the day comes from CEO of Mozilla, Gary Kovacs. You remember Mozilla, whose Firefox helped dismantle Microsoft's grip on web browsers. Well that Mozilla has announced it's first generation of Firefox OS devices, with CEO Cesar Alienta of Telephonica lashing out at "Closed operating systems (Read that Apple)". Da da da da da da... (In case you don't recognize that, it's the theme from Jaws).

Danica Patrick stayed up with the big boys for 499 miles. 5,180 feet. But, her inexperience showed, and she admitted a bit of a mental lapse during crunch time. She did, however, overcome a lot of innate negativism. For instance, I noticed that after she won the pole position, the odds in Vegas that showed 50-1 for the field average (All men), had her at 500-1. I looked it up again yesterday morning and Danica was 100-1 where the highest man was 20-1. The biggest slight though, came from James Franco who announced "Drivers and Danica, start your engines." I believe Danica always thought of herself as a driver, not a sideshow. The good news for sanity -- after the race several of the crusty ole boy winners said that she's going to make a lot of money racing this year. "We enjoyed racing with her."

Again I say, let the sequestration begin. I don't think it will hurt the economy a nit. Even the liberal newspapers in reporting potential disasters for jobs and programs, use the hedging adjective "Risk of".  

A headline over the lead editorial in the Sunday Journal said, "Get moving on gay marriage." But never, ever have I read a headline in any section of the paper that said, "Get moving on ridding the state of union domination which is crippling every citizens' future." Including all union members.

Things we know: Head Start is a government program that hasn't worked. Pouring tons of money into education hasn't worked and this has been proven repeatedly. Yet, 0-Man is proposing more new tons of money for an early preschool education to give kids a really head start. Of course it is mainly to help his Union friends. And, it also accomplishes what Dems often want to accomplish, take the eye off the ball. We have a cultural problem in America where more and more people are following the wrong leaders; where more and more people are acquiescing to bureaucratic nurturing. There are lots of smart kids in the US getting great educations and doing a lot with their knowledge. Every child in American has an equal opportunity to the same education, but unfortunately too many parents, and too many peers, can't see beyond their visceral stimulation, can't see that learning is the only thing that will give their kid, or buddy, a chance.

The reason Hollywood makes so many dumbed-down, violent, raunchy, inane movies is because people pay to see them.

In fact, these new movies are so dumbed-down, my Spell-Check would go to see em'.

The local pols are musing about the possible Republican challengers to the Dem trio in 2014. They call Senator Read, "Most Popular" Senator. I call him most enigmatic, a man with no apparent personality, who seems to shrink in the spotlight, without an independent, creative brain cell in his head who is firmly affixed to puppet strings of his controllers. Yet he gets reelected over the years because RI voters have become enamored with him bringing home mountains of defense jobs to the State. Bringing home what every state gets anyhow from the big Monopoly game in DC. So, exactly what does bringing home Government pre-cooked bacon do? It creates a dependency on the Federal goverment designed jobs. It's not "Snap" but its the next most addictive drug going. And, in many states, it keeps mediocrity in Government alive.

You begin to understand how hard it is for the Repubs and Dems to get together when you consider that the face of the Democrat Party Is the acerbic Debbie Wasserman Shultz.

Great! Just great! Now all the kids in the school yard will be singing, "We saw your boobs."

The Repubs, I mean the Conservatives, need some new super spokes-people. I thought this the other day, I think last Friday, when I turned on the radio and heard a rather authoritative voice talking sensibly with solid facts about how big business is continually skewered in America. He talked about all that businesses do for local economies, and that it is considerable; Often much more than state and local legislatures. He talked quietly, with a believable tone. He was the CEO of Whole Foods. Yes the supermarket darling Politically Correct eaters. A supermarket chain run by this guy who operates an excellent corporate enterprise. He was talking about what real business people do. Not the mythological business people, the scary bogeymen of Hollywood and Politicians. He was talking beautifully, until I heard, "So does that mean you hate Obama?". It was Sean Hannity screaming in. Trying to sensationalize good information, which perhaps would reach far deeper into the masses beyond the choirs. Credibility happens when the messengers are credible. Too many of the older Conservative messengers are much too hysterical. Frankly, I haven't listened to or watched Hannity for many years. And, Friday, he reinforced why I shouldn't.

The Answer:
1. Bob Hope with 19, had the longest tenure in a list of hosts that began with Douglas Fairbanks and included Will Rogers, and Walter Mathau. After Hope there is Billy Crystal with 9, Johnny Carson (5) and and Whoopie Goldberg with 4. Steve Martin had 3. Next is a list of Hosts with 2 -- Jerry Lewis, Jack Benny, Jack Lemmon, Goldie Hawn, Jon Stewart had two. After Hope there was Bonus: Number 10 is Napa, cal. The rest down to # One are Boulder Co, Boston, Thousand Oaks Cal, NYC, Trenton NJ (?), San Fran, DC, San Jose and Stamford Connecticut.

After blowing high profile gigs at the Oscars last year and Daytona 500 yesterday, what 's next for James Franco -- announcing President Obama's entrance into next years State of the Union speech.

I have yet to see an Academy Awards night that wasn't over-produced and under-executed. That's what happens when you take away the actor's scripts.

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Next, the torture chamber?

Today's Tids Issue 2,776

Opening Stuff:

 

Well my favorite old doctor finally succumbed to the burdensome Government paperwork and reduced payments for services. He's closing shop, and for me, and him it is a sad day. He said, "I'd like to stay and see and to talk to and care for old &#%$*'s like you, but I know it is only going to get worse here under ObamaCare. My staff has had it, too." So I'm losing an old friend, and a Doctor who would let me think I was getting away with lying about my weight.

Well, let's get right to it, The Famous Tids Oscar Picks. Argo seems like the momentum film of the moment, and I think it will win Best Pic, with perhaps a dark horse Silver Lining Playbook surprising. I thought Lincoln was...just ok. Director will probably go to Spielburg now that Affleck was snubbed. But, again watch out for SLP and Director David Russell. Best Actor will be Daniel Day-Lewis, but I have to say I heard him slip into his Irish tendencies a couple of times. Finally, SLP will win with Jennifer Lawrence as best Actress. Personally, I thought Tommy Lee Jones stole the show in Lincoln, and he should win. But, Alan Arkin also stole the show in Argo. This may be the closest race of the night. For Supporting Actress everybody is saying Anne Hatheway is a foregone conclusion, but I thought the Flying Nun, I mean Sally Field, was the best actor of them all in Lincoln. So that's it. Have I hedged it enough to become President of the US?

How times have changed Department:
Eisenhower once said, Beware of the Industrial-Military complex. How come we don't have a real President warning  us about the Industrial-Healthcare complex. Can you say "Scooter Store"?

The Question:
When people talk about great movie musicals, Marni Nixon is never seen but often heard. Name big movies where she was the singing voice for big stars, and one where she became known as the singer?

The Headlines:--Market Opens Slightly Higher; Could Be Day To Bust Out Of Slump; New Positive News Still Dwarfed By Negative Situations.

--Prez Goes To Congress In Bi-Partisanship Sham, But Gap Still Wide.
--Powerful Midwestern Storm Could Be Heading To the Northeast.
--al-Qaida Has Tip Sheet On Avoiding The Drone; Free With Each Box Of Islamic Wheaties.
--Iran Announces New Reactor; Could Be New Way To Make Bomb.
--Syrian Opposition Say the refuse To negotiate With Assad; No deal.
--China, Russia Say No To Military Action In NK.
--Car Crash, Shooting Kills Three On Vegas Strip; Gunmen In Range Riover Open Fire On Maserati Killing Driver, Causing Multi car Crash.

Let's hear it for the Academic All American Basketball Players. Yes, that is not an oxymoron. The guys with brains who paid attention and got the most out of the big bucks they received for playing...a scholarship...were Aaron Craft, Ohio State; Kelly Olynyk, Gonzaga; Mason Plumlee, Duke; Cody Zeller, Indiana; Matt Sullivan, Brown. Ohio State?

Wait a minute...Am I actually hearing that "Snap Benefits" is the new word for Food Stamps. Did that asteroid on the way to Russia drop off aliens in the Executive Branch while passing over the White House. It sounds like an idea for a new Hollywood musical, "Snap yo fingers, and the victuals will fly, Snap yo fingers and you can invest galore, with scratch off tickets from yo convenience store." It reminds me of the "Great come and get day" scene from Finians Rainbow. The world is coming to an end.

My new Doctor will probably have a second Phd in nutrition. Life is going to hell.

Bill Reilly's next book is "Killing Jesus". Is there really a possibility for a sequel after that?

Mayo and chicken always go well together. Actually lemon, mayo, bacon and chicken always go beautifully together. Unless of course you have had Italian sausage and chicken in a white wine, Parmesan, chicken broth sauce.

Here's why Obama thinks his voting base is stupid. He proposes Sequestration cuts so he could tell them all how he battered the "Rich" with higher taxes. Then he goes out before the same open mouthed, gaping masses and tells them all why each area cut by sequestration will be bad for America -- Standing there on stage with a representatives of each constituency lined up neatly in rows behind, he says with a straight face framed by large unhearing ears, "How could Congress do this to you?". He is the most disingenuous president of the 20th and 21st century...including Harding.

But, people will say "That's just Politics". Manny being Manny.

Speaking of Politics, RI's next Governor race is shaping up nicely. First, the legislature should do something about demanding runoffs between the top 2 vote-getters in 3 party races. We don't need another governor with only a third of the voters. And believe me, Chafee-Lite will run for a repeat, and he will make a good case, and possibly a persuasive one for a job well done, even with chortling ringing with gusto about the state. The Dems have two really good Candidates in Gina Raimondo and Angel Taveras. I like them both. For the Repubs I believe that Alan Fung of Cranston, (Close friend and schoolboy chum of Taveras) is one of the better GOP candidates in years. However Brenden Doherty, who lost to well known prevaricator in his Congressional race, has a big war chest. He could be the man, but I like Fung better. I know him a bit, and he is much more than a political handshake. The Unions hate both Gina and Alan, and to a lesser extent Taveras. The three took the unions a few steps back. So, it could be a three person race with pro-union Chafee-Lite versus union realists Raimondo or Taveras and Fung. I know for whom I would vote.

BTW, all of the three -- R,T,F --would be great replacements for our current senatorial dour duo. But, this still beautiful land, and great state of yore seems to like the status quo, including high unemployment and no growth.

Why are the prices for healthcare and medical products and devices so high? Because Government intrusion skirts the reality of a competitive Free Enterprise system -- it shovels out piles of money, and manufacturers and sales companies dive into them. Like Scrooge McDuck.

Reading between the Lines Movie Reviews:
--Snitch is described as "Action-Thriller" a combination of words that normally means too many car chases. But this flick has a story line going for it. It's about a father fighting for his son wrongly accused of a drug distribution crime. It is tense and perhaps over the top at times, but still a riveting human story. I'll wait til it gets to Fx TV.
--Inescapable is a pretty good yarn about a Syrian who moves to the US to escape his past, and the people there who want him dead. Later his daughter, unaware of dad's past, goes to Syria  for a  business venture. She is kidnapped and the father goes to get her. It is pretty good and I would go.

The Answer:
Marni sang in operas and with symphonies around the world. but it was as the off screen screen voice in H-Wood where she made her dough. She first appeared as the voices of singing angels heard by Joan of Arc. Next she was the singing voice for Margaret O'Brien in Secret Garden (One of my personal favorites from the '40's. Did I say 40's? Yikes) and then, yes MM fans, singing "Diamonds are a girls best Friend" for Marilyn Monroe in Gentleman Prefer Blonds. Deborah Kerr loved the way Marni sang her voice in The King and I and next in An Affair to Remember. She was the voice  of Natalie Wood in West Side Story and then for Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady. Time Mag dubbed her "The Ghostess with the Mostest". Her first on screen performance was as Sister Sofia in Sound of Music.

Have a spe - spe - spe - spectacular weekend everybody!

Thanks for listenin'.

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Cleanliness is...

Today's Tids Issue 2,775

Opening Stuff:

 

Japan is losing population at a dangerously rapid rate. Social scientists there believe it is the result of intense, 12 hour work days. So the mighty Japanese firm Canon is asking that their employees take two hours off during the day, to see what might "develop"! So, the next time you snap a picture or make a copy, look beyond the machine and into the smiling faces of those who may have made them.

Duh, Department:

In his first speech as Secretary of State, John Kerry boldly announced that 7 of the worlds fastest growing economies are on the African Continent. Where are the other three? -- Antarctica.

The Question:

What are some of Kelsey Grammar's best roles?

The Headlines:

--Sequestration, Tightening In China, Weakness In Housing, Nervous Fed, Rising Gas Prices, Overbought Equities Have Investors Looking For Correction; Correction Expected To be Shallow 5%.

--Questions Rise About Pistorius Evidence As Chief Investigator Is Brought Up On Murder Charges.

--Congress Salaries And Bennies Protected from Sequester Cuts.

--New Polls Say That Most Americans Feel Illegal Aliens Should Be Deported.

--Massive Snow Storm Smothering Western States.

--Car Bomb In Damascus Kills 35 In Ruling Party Building.

I see where NY's Governor Cuomo strode way past his assumed core beliefs by supporting his new law that would allow abortion up to the seconds before birth. A woman's has the right to choice about  her body, he repeated often. Yet, he has led the charge along with Mayor Bloomberg attacking the fate white man's choice to stuff Cheetos and other salty crunch food substitutes into his temple of God, and wash it all down with sugary drinks. His own body which took years of careful overindulging to form into that robust presence. Where's the outrage? Where is the choice for men?

What you don't want to hear when in your new Google "Self Driving" Car: "Recalculating."

I don't believe an American can be named Pope mainly because of possible ties to sex abuse cases.

Manifestos of al-Qaida, discovered in the aftermath of Mali fighting, show significant in fighting among the various Islamic tribes.. It is this  same infighting that has led to the less than perfect results for the "Arab Spring". One main dispute centers around timing -- timing for implementing full Islamic take-over and Sharia Law. The Islamist love these revolutions because in general they are the most organized of all groups interesting in leading. The problem arises after they get there between the go-slow's and jump-ins. The Go-slows feel that they should gather allies before going crazy like, perhaps Moruso, who in Egypt wrote a new Constitution before he had really formed a Government. Any how, for Middle East observers it is the new game in town. And, it will be magnified by what ever happens in Syria where the many rebel factions are quite distasteful of each other.

Did you know that the Japanese won their hard fought 1930's battles against a much larger Russian force with "Hygiene". Yes the Japan soldiers were very clean, and patiently overrode a Russian army stricken with Typhus and other dirt related diseases. Ah, the strategy of war...pack your soap.

The Market seems adrift, with not a lot of good news heading it's way. As the earnings season wind down, will there be a sell-off? time to keep eyes wide open.

After a full day of hiking through the Grand Canyon, the hungry hikers gorged themselves.

The Answer:

Kelsey as you all know first gained fame on Cheers as Doctor Frasier Crane. He also had the great run with the show Frasier, and appeared as Frasier Crane on the John Larroquette Show and Wings. But before he became everybody's psychiatrist he had a checkered career with roles in TV movies Beyond Suspicion, The Innocent, George Washington, Kennedy Paul Reiser Out on a Whim. he was in series Kate and Allie, Crossings and Another World.

Government largess would quell the imagination of the mighty and the spirit of the poor alike.

Wash your hands. Maybe the government will go away.

Have a winning day!

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Never put off a trip to the Dentist.

Today's Tids Issue 2,774

Opening Stuff:

 

Eye on the News: Personally, I think that sequestration is going to happen, and will be a good thing. First, it could reduce TV face time for the President and his backdrop of the day. Second, it would be a start into the difficult journey towards economic reality. Third, I don't think the economy will fail because of it; It will readjust to new circumstances. Fourth, the longer a decision is postponed, the more it is going to hurt.

As far as I can see, the debate in Washington has drifted away from the essence of the question and onto how to cleverly place blame on someone else.

While everybody was being mesmerized by the Public Relations efforts of Apple, Google with Droid and so much more, zoomed past 800.

Every time some natural cold event occurs, the Global Warmers create a new science that explains away the frigidity as being the result of man made warming.

The Question:

Name the Top Ten Most Popular Social Networking sites.

The Headlines:

--Simpson And Bowles Blast Inaction In Washington; "This Is Madness," They Say While Introducing Anew Plan.

--Expensive Vegetables Pushing Producer Price Index Up; Housing Begins New Slump.

--Once Again, Greeks Protest Austerity.

--Bulgarian Government Resigns Amid Protests; Tunisia Seeks New Premiere To End Political Crisis.

--Cadaver Dogs Looking For Possible Bodies After Giant Kansas City Restaurant Blast.

--New Products For Yahoo! Will Have Company Going After FaceBook And Twitter.

Duh, Department:

Obama's chief henchman Axelrod has a new job with NBC and MSNBC. He should be paying NBC, considering what the news departments did for his guy. Now, you know where not to go when looking for unbiased news. Hey, wait a minute, Fair and Balanced Fox hired Carl Rove.

It's pretty obvious that big grocery stores are designed for the store marketing plans and not the customer.

The Providence Friars-Syracuse Orangemen Basketball game tonight will be a war. Syracuse is a media darling, and Providence is the resurgent team nobody wants to play right now.

I see where Office Depot is going to acquire Officemax. It's about time. I couldn't tell them apart anyhow.

Is Dell joining Xerox as great business names hanging on by their fingernails. Xerox has been a shadow of it's earlier gigantic self for twenty years or so. (BTW-It's TV commercials have over time been the worst on a continuous basis.) As you all know, Dell not looking forward to laboring under the eye of Wall Street going forward, has put together this dandy little $23 Billion (Yikes!) stock buy back. Yesterday the former premiere PC builder beat Street estimates. Yes, the 30% decline (Yikes again!) in earnings wasn't as bad as the analysts thought. Nice for the Street, but not for reality. But looking beneath the facade of manufactured earnings reports, we see double digit declines in it's main source of revenue, PC's. Over the past thirty years or so, many "Unstoppable" computer giants have disappeared off the face of the earth, Just like that! And I'm sure some of those ghosts of Bytes past had declining earnings that beat estimates.

Remember a couple of days ago I advised you never to go beyond headlines that included the word "Could". This morning I broke my own rule when I went to the story exclaimed by the head, "Higgs Boson Particle Could Spell Doom for the Universe." Zowie!, I said. That is not good news coming out of the humongous and very expensive Hadron Collider in Geneva Switzerland.  And then I read further that, "It may be that the universe we live in is inherently unstable, and at some point (The calculations tell you) many tens of billions of years from now there might be a catastrophic end to the world. Now, I call that a good news headline.

How come President Obama ordered the flag lowered to half mast for drug soaked Whitney Houston, but not for murdered war hero Chris Kyle?

I'm all for Simpson-Bowles as long as it doesn't affect me.

Sequestration sounds like economic castration. Ouch!

The Conscience: Chapter 14 continues.
   "So, James, why again are we so interested in the yacht business?"
   "It's just something I've been following for a number of years. I always liked watching the boats in Mobile Bay. Comin' and goin'. Maybe some day going with a little ole black boy from the south on board." he paused and looked out the window at the Financial district skyscrapers below." "Just  one-a my dreams, Milton."
   "Maybe you'll get a free jumbo yacht out of the deal, Jimbo."
   Jim smiled at his eager friend. "Have we heard from Baglietto? Do we know what's going on over there?"
   "I know that a glassy eyed, alcoholic lawyr showed up to represent Bernard. I know that Angelica didn't throw him out of the office."
   James smiled to himself. "Just let this one run its course, Milt. Things will fall into place, I guarantee you that."
   "From what I see, that Bomb blast made both sides skitterish. That's for sure." Milton waited a second watching James peer into his computer screen, press a few keys and then turn back.
   "We just made a couple of million." James smiled and Milton gave him a remote Fist bump. James bumped back.
   Milton now looked down at $300 shoes, wiped a piece of dust off the shiny tip and then back up to his friend. "I guess, what I'm thinking Jimbo, if, if we can make a couple of million pressing keys on a computer, why do we have to get involved in tis crazy yacht thing. You ain't tellin' me everything."
   "No, I ain't, but I guarantee, you'll know it when you see it."

The Answer:
The first two are easy, Facebook 750 Mil Unique Monthly Visitors (UMV) and Twitter 250 M UMV. The rest are Linkedin (110M), Pinterest 85.5M), My Space (70,5M), Google Plus (65M), DeviantArt (25.5), LiveJournal (20.5), Tagged (19.5 and #10 is Orkut (17.5). The rest in the top fifteen are CafeMom, Ning, Meeting, myLife and Multiply. And, this morning Yahoo! says they will enter the battle.

A good old friend and reader sent this tale about two Mexicans sneaking across the border, starving, wandering aimlessly. One, Luis, says, "Eh Pepe, do you smell what I smell? Ees bacon, I theeeenk.". "Ees bacon I'm smellin too, Luis. Motivated they crawl over a dune and spy in the distance what looks like a Bacon tree. Every branch loaded with crispy bacon that looks delicious. And now smells stronger. Luis shouts, "Wees saved. Eeet's a Bacon Tree." Pepe cautions that in this desert it may be "a meerage." Undaunted they move forward, "No meerage smells like Bacon," says Luis, who is now staggering towards the bacon tree. Suddenly, a machine gun opens fire and Luis drops like a wet sock. In his dying breath, he warns his friend, "Pepe, pepe, go back man. Ees not a Baocn tree. "Ees," he coughs, "Eees, ees, ees....a Ham Bush."

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