Enigmas upon conundrums.

Today's Tids Issue 4,906

Paradigm Time:

 

Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of bottles.

 

I won a lottery of sorts this morning, but I hope it doesn’t go count against my life’s luck reservoir going forward. Just as I opened my bottom freezer drawer to take out a breakfast item, the icemaker decided it was time to drop a load. Yikes! It only goes one place, behind and under the freezer drawer. So I got a yard stick and cleaned the ice under the drawer, which then scattered across the kitchen floor. I thought I got it all until later when I found puddles hither and yon. Now I was on my knees soaking up water. Well, at least we got a clean kitchen floor out of it. And, all of this before coffee and food. But my biggest fear is that this may reduce my odds of winning a lottery that actually pays money. Maybe this is as randomly lucky as I get.

 

One of the biggest current problems, at least here in the east coast, is the soaring costs of rental homes and apartments in these coastal areas. Many longtime residents are being forced to move away from towns in which they have lived for years, maybe since birth. The demand for homes and living space is forcing prices way beyond the reach of many, even those with good jobs and decent incomes. Many are overpaying more for homes because of the investment opportunities which would produce income to support inflated housing values.  This is a real societal enigma. And, another contributing factor is that rising home valuations increase property taxes making once comfortable living situations more costly. Ah progress.

 

I like the name Ash Barty.

 

 

The Question:

A guy dropped four hooks into the lake but he wasn’t fishing. What was he doing? Bonus: Only one part of the USA has been invaded and occupied. Who did it and where did it happen?

 

The Headlines:

--Stocks Plummet; Techs Slammed; New Ugly Word On The Street: Inflation; Fed Says Economy Is Ok.

--Russell Westbrook Breaks Oscar (The Big “O”) Robinson’s 47 Year Old Record For Triple Doubles.

--Bodies Washing Up On River Banks In India As Virus Continues To Kill.

—Prez Biden Denies That Giving Away Free Lunches Is Reason For Slow Jobs recovery.

--Baffert Now Admits Illegal Drug In Derby Winner May Have Come From Dermatitis Treatment.

 

World Health Officials are becoming quite worried about the India Coronavirus variant (B.1.617). It spreads more easily than others, is said to be deadlier, and that it should be considered a serious global concern. It’s always good to stay ahead of the curve. But this time, let’s hope Gov officials are more concerned over balancing all aspects of the effects of this scrouge.

 

What disease did cured ham actually have?

 

For the first time in decades, The USA does not have a men’s Tennis player ranked in the top 30. Remember when the USA seemed to be number one in just about everything from sports to finance to freedom, civility, manufacturing innovation and output, middle income wages and cooperative democracy? Remember Pride in America.  

 

Oh, in case you are interested, the top three men’s tennis players are Novak Djokovic, Daniel Medvedev (new at the top) and Rafeal Nadal. The highest ranked Americans are Taylor Fritz (31) and John Isner (35). The top three women are Ash Barty, Naomi Osaka and Simona Halep. Three top US women are Serena Williams at # 8 and Jennifer Brady at #13.

 

Sign in a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes.   Sit!   Stay!"

 

Remember when US tennis players were always among the best and Australians were dominant. There are surely many greats playing today, but my favorite fun tennis era was when all of the great Aussies were playing and dominating – Rod laver, John Newcombe, Ken Rosewall, Roy Emerson, Lew Hoad and Tony Roach

 

The difference between the 2008 economic recovery and the current recovery is that 2008 we had too much of everything and now we have too little of everything. It’s better in a recovery to have too little.

 

If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?

 

The Answer:

The guy who put four hooks into the water was playing golf. Bada Bing! Bonus: The Japanese in 1942 invaded and occupied Attu and Kiska, two islands in the Aleutians. Weather and the terrain slowed the US and Canadian forces, but they finally got their acts together  and liberated the islands in the “Battle of the Aleutians”.

 

Sign at an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."