If it tastes good, people will come.

Today's Tids Issue 3,451

Opening Stuff:

I think I’m getting older. I just don’t have the same confidence as I did before riding on the back of grocery carts through supermarket parking lots. But, I still try. I haven’t yet hit a mother toting kids, pushing a full basket. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Sometimes Schubert sounds a lot like Mozart, but Tchaikovsky always sounds like Tchaikovsky.

What’s the lesson for kids who spend days thinking of and trying try to create the most imaginative costume, go through an evening smiling and trying to be nice to donors, lugging increasingly heavy bags while fending off “Big Kid” marauders, braving wind cold and sometimes snow to fulfill their sweet fantasies. Then, they come home to endure their parents absconding with 2/3’s of the reward they have dreamed about for 364 days. Parents robbing kids of their hard earned assets is criminal and un-American. Oh, Wait a minute that’s old America. It’s for your own good, they say to teary eyed children. That’s the new we-know-better America  Today’s America, redistributing hard earned wealth America.

A NY Jets fan paid to have a plane fly over the NE Patriots stadium toting the banner “Clintons – Patriots – OJ”. The reporting news services said they didn’t know what it meant! I suspect it will not be a news item in the national media.

The Question:

The invention of Vodka is often attributed to Russia. But two other countries have laid claim to being first with vodka. What are they? Bonus: Name the top 5 touring canals I ten world.

The Headlines:

--Canadian Whale Watching Boat Capsizes And Sinks; 5 Dead, 22 Rescued.

--Next Strong Market Play Could Be Rebound Of Oil Stocks

--7.7 Earthquake Hits Northern Afghanistan.

--Driver IN Oklahoma State Homecoming Massacre Charged With 2^nd Degree Murder; Still Investigating Facts.

--Jeb Slashes Campaign Budget; Trump Blasts Iowa Pollster Who Have Him Running Second.

--Royals Win Over Toronto; On To Meet Mets In WS.

--Lerner Skates.

As the cool returns, I’m reminded of spending winter after winter, ingenious contraption following ingenious contraption trying to keep squirrels out of my bird feeders. But, alas, they were just way too smart for me.

I have a simple sports rule. I don’t ever root for teams whose nicknames rhyme with “ets”.

Making vodka choices these days has become kind of sport. Gone are the simpler days of Popov or Fleischman’s for price or Smirnoff or Stoli for image and jolt. If you just have to spend money, then “Billionaire Vodka” at $1.3 Mil per bottle is for you! But that ain’t me and perhaps not you. For a little less you can get fancy Grey Goose or Absolut pricier alternatives for $840.00 and a Grand respectively. If you want to spend wisely, Svedka comes up quite well on several of the taste tests I read preparing for this Tidlet. The 10 most popular Vodkas are #1 Grey Goose followed by  ChrystalHead, Finlandia, Stolichnaya, Absolut, Smirnoff, Belvedere, Skyy, Pinnacle and Russian Standard. People must just like to say Ketel One in restaurants, because it doesn’t come up that high on polls.

It’s easy to understand why injustices in the courts produce seething anger in urban communities.

While we weren’t looking, Aldi’s, the low priced supermarket chain with great fresh veggies ranked higher than Trader Joes by consumers for “Value”.

One of the little things in life I have noticed that no matter how rich ro sophisticated people are, they still  have trouble resisting a gooey delicious snack. 

Brown University should take a page out of the Las Vegas philosophy: “What happens at Brown stays at Brown”. You may have heard that Malia Ann Obama came back to Providence for her second campus visit, this time a weekend stay to get the feel of the college and the kids there. But, just when it appeared that another child of a president (Amy Carter and JFK Jr. were Brown kids) might enter next fall, some mindless, really smart student thought it a good idea to post a pic of Malia Ann in front of what appeared to be a Beer Pong set up. Beer pong is probably not on Mama’s food pyramid, so we’ll Probably see this Obama child at Princeton. How stupid are kids with camera phones and Instagram.

Maybe someday judges will stop releasing potential cop, and other people killers to rehab instead of sending them to jail. Maybe then we can stop the crying of parents and spouses, siblings and friends.

Just about everybody knows that two most popular vodka based drinks are Bloody Mary and Screwdriver, but how many have ever survived a drink called “Sex on the Beach” – 1 oz vod, 1 oz peach liquor, 1 ½ oz OJ and 1 ½ oz CranJ. Voda, the quiet liquor, can sneak up on you.

Will The Montreal Canadians ever lose again? Of course, right after I typed those words. You’ve heard of the Tids Jinx, haven’t you?

The Parking Lot: Chapter 23 continues..

    “Sit!” Jerry was a man of few words, and looking around he saw a crew of three tightlipped, mean looking men who probably weren’t great laughers either. Fred was clearly scared and he suspected that his good old boy back slapping was not going to help him here.

    “Do you have a bath room here,” Fred asked hoping for a little kindness.

    “We want you to be uncomfortable, Mr. Hohlman.” Jerry nodded to the other three, namng them in order, Daniel, Charlie and Rocco. “Remember those names Mr. Holhman, because you will get to know them.”

    Fred just looked at each of them as they were named. None of them showed any emotion or acknowledged their name. Fred turned back to Jerry, feeling a little better, that perhaps he was not about to be killed or ven maimed.

    “Mr. Rackovic wanted you to get to know these three, you have already met Jasper and Sam. Fred was remembering the fat guys leaving the cafe. See, Mr. Hohlman, Mr. Rackovic isn’t so sure you know how serious we are about what we want and what we need to do to get it.” He paused. Looked down at Fred, now squirming a bit more as his bladder became painful. “Give me your phone.”

   “How about if I trade you for a trip to the bathroom. Fred smiled. Nobody smiled in return.

   “Good Try Hohlman, I might get to like you if you behave. Give me the phone. He handed the phone to Jerry. Who proceeded to tap something into it.

    “I just put my number into your list. You are to call me any time you hear anything about the casino, especially from people who are against it  like ten woman Nancy. Have you seen her. Jerry had raised his voice at that point.

   Fred, now properly chastised, shrank a little turning his “no” several times, mumbling “No, not for days.”

The Answer:

Before 1950, there was little vodka consumed outside of Russia. So naturally, the invention was considered Russian. But we now have learned what medieval alchemists did in their dingy halls of discovery, they distilled vodka but that was before popular acceptance by one country. There’s actually a lot of debate about where the clear somewhat odorless liquid was discovered, with the Polish making a strong case for being #1. However, Italians say their Genoa merchants traveling around the known world left the recipe in Moscow. The known fact is that where it was dank and cold for many winter months, vodka drinking soared! And that was Russia. Bonus: Many people who have traveled canals agree that after you’ve gone through the process of one lock, the rest are rather tedious. The Panama Canal is #1, with the New York canal system (Buffalo to Albany) recognized as #2. After that we have the Baltic Sea Canal in Russia (Vodka is served), Copenhagen Denmark and Amsterdam The Netherlands. The Next five are Romania’s Black Sea Canal, Sweden’s Gota Canal, The Waterways of Brandenburg Germany, English Channel (?) and Shropshire Union Canal in England. Canal travel is relaxing, but not nearly as much fun as riding on the backs of shopping carts.

Love the week you’re starting!