Utopias on earth. Not

Today's Tids Issue 3.445

Opening Stuff:

Forever, politicians have promised utopia as their primary message to get votes. It’s all about free and the people who don’t want to do anything to get something have bought into it all of the time since the beginning of time. Utopia is defined three ways by Webster: 1. An imaginary and indefinitely remote place; 2. A place of ideal perfection especially in laws, government and social conditions; 3; An impractical scheme for social improvement. Get the picture? It always seems like a great idea, but it has never worked. One simple reason, humans are involved. Republicans see a utopia where independence and hard work takes care of everybody. Dems see utopia as communal and government ordered. Everybody wants Utopia and everybody thinks they have a plan to get there. But, they should all come with warning labels.

There’s nothing more Utopian than diving into a bag of Cheetos, savoring the perfection of tangy cheese, and most important muffling out the sounds of daily discord. How did I ever get on this topic, anyhow?

I think young woman are cussing more so they can get jobs as bartenders.

The Question:

The idea of perfect “Utopian’ societies go back to Plato and St. Thomas Moore. Mao and yes even Assad probably thought they had created a Utopia. In the US, starting in the 1830’s through  the 1880’s, there were many defined, well known utopian movements. Name five.

The Headlines:

--Palestinians Torch Saint Joseph’s Tomb In West Bank.

--Dow Up; Gold Dives; Economic News Generally Favorable; Europe Inflation Declines; VW Sales Not Hurt By Scandal..

--Carson, Cruz, Bush Leading Repubs In Money Raising Race; Sanders Raking It In On Dem Side.

--Biden Close To Decision; Says If He Does It, He Will Need Help From Many; Hill Hints At Julian Castro For VP Pick, Does Not rule Out Kanye West..

-- Mets Win To Join Cubs, Athletics And Blue Jays In MLB Final Four.

--Turkey Shoots Down Russian Drone.

--FBI Considering Violation Of Subsection Of USA Espionage Act In Hill Email Caper: “Gross Negligence (Of Defense Information In Messages…)”.

--Nevada First State To Ban Fantasy Sports Sites, Including Draft Kings And Fan Duel.

--Kepler Telescope Spots Strange Star; Sign Of Alien Life?

My stomach rolled over when I read the headline: “Third NYC Baby Thrown Out Window In Three Months.” What the hell is going on in this world!

I was thinking that the next big PC problem in America will be Muslims trying to change the nicknames of all Catholic High Schools and Colleges that have chosen “Crusaders”.

Utopia is caramel crisp ice cream topped by hot fudge. OMG, I just went into diabetic shock thinking abut it.

I think we need an unfetterization of America.

Archeologists in Virginia made a historic discovery at their State House when upon opening a wall they found the chemical lab of Thomas Jefferson. Today if they opened wall at a capitol building or state house, it would more likely be a meth lab.

Everybody is trying to take down Apple, and there is none more active than Google with Android. A former IOS fanatic lists six reasons why Android is the better choice, much to his own astonishment. 1. More phone choices including Google’s own new Nexus 2. The “personal assistant” is better than Siri and will even better with the new “Marshmallow. 3. Andoid uses standard connectors. 4. Android is improving battery life 5. Android cameras at least a match to Apple 6. Apple’s Retina HD screen still lags behind Android screens that gamers like. Apple almost reached Utopia…until that dammed competition raised its ugly head.

The Parking Lot: Chapter 22 continues…

    “Ok, Jared, you are in it now.” Nancy looks over at Beth solemn and confused. “And, you too Beth, if you want to join us.”

    “Join you in what? I just serve coffee and smile at customers. What possibly could I do.” She paused. “My husband and children must be wondering where I am. Maybe the police are looking for me. I would be a liability, but I want to help you, Nancy,” she looked at the ground, ‘And also you, Jared.” She smiled and for the first time she was the one breaking the tension.” Nancy started to speak, but Beth interrupted, “I would be more helpful to you in my own place in the community. You need somebody outside, and I would be willing to do that.”

  “It could be dangerous,” chimed in Jared,” who had been pretty silent all morning. “Fred probably saw you leave involuntarily with the dead thugs.”

   “I can get around that with Fred.” She gave a knowing glance at Nancy. Who grinned slightly. “The bigger problem is that the town is facing something which we don’t know too much about, but that surely won’t be good for them. That’s’ obvious from the violent events of yesterday, and the intimidation we have sensed, experienced.” She looked at Nancy. “We need to develop and counterbalance their ruthlessly programmed agenda .” You can’t do that hidden away on an island.

   Jared was now intent, just staring at Beth as she spoke. She stopped speaking a sa up, looking pretty dammed confident for woman nearly beaten to death just less than 24 hours ago. Jared thought that he could see now why Nancy and Beth were so close.

 

Utopia is rarely finite, because somebody is always looking for a better way. 

Reading Between the Lines Movie Reviews:

--The Bridge of Spies is getting some critical raves, but movie goers may find it slow going as Spielberg methodically builds a story. Regardless, this is good one about a Brooklyn insurance claims lawyer, former Nuremberg trial lawyer, who is chosen by the Government to make a deal to free downed U2 pilot Francis Gary Powers. Tense at times and always fascinating to watch.

--Goosebumps is a scary pic for younger people based on the popular scare kids to death book series. Parents will also shudder a bit as Jack Black, a prisoner of his own imagination – the monsters he created in his books -- Goosebumps. He is RL Stine and he suddenly releases them from his mind to terrorize the town. His teen daughter and teen neighbor friend race with him to get the marauding monsters back into the pages of the book

--Room is the scariest film of all. A five year old boy is seen being raised lovingly by his mom, nurturing him and playing games. It all takes place in a windowless, 10 x 10 foot space. She cals it “Room”. Over time, the boy’s curiosity coupled with a decline in mom’s resilience, pushes them to escape where come in face to face with the scariest situation of all -- The real World. It’s not Utopia.

The Answer:

The first big movement was yes, the Mormons, founded under a new set of scriptures from God that allowed polygamy. There was the upstate NY “Oneida Community” of John Noyes which was basically communism and featuring free love. Begun in England under Ann lee, The Shaker Movement was huge, but they restricted free love and promoted celibacy. There are but 3 members left. New Harmony was started by Robert Owen in Indiana on land purchased from another Utopia group The Rappites. It was communal but based on little of substance  and eschewed religion. It failed quickly. Lastly, there was Brook Farm based on the popular at the time transcendentalism. It was started by Robert Ripley in Massachusetts. It promoted abolition, women’s rights and labor rights. It lasted 3 years.

Judging by the way the government is operating today and the acidic political disharmony, I’d say we are about as far away from Utopia as you can get.

Ok, is it “a” or “an” before “historic”?

But I hope you all have a Utopian weekend – E-v-e-r-b-o-d-y!