Today's Tids Issue 2,123
Opening Stuff:
You think you have everything under control. The sun is shining. The boss loves you. Your lawn is growing great with fewer weeds this year. The kids are doing well. And then you remember…”I don’t have a Mother’s day card yet!” Yikes!
Hey! Today is a big day, and in honor of it I’m all for giving away free tacos. Even if Cinque de mayo is nothing holiday in Mexico, our Hispanic condoning society has elevated it to St. Patrick’s Day status here. So lets give away those “free” tacos, and maybe lure a few illegal aliens out of hiding. Now that would be something to celebrate.
I have been told I have ears of corn because I like listening to puns.
The Question:
One of the funniest. More irreverent comedy groups of our times was Monty Python. Name the original members of the troupe. What was the name of the BBC show that launched their fame?
The Headlines:
--NY Bomb Suspect Cooperating; No Fly Listed Bomber Gets On Get-Away Plane..
--Weather Cooperating With Forces Trying To Battle Giant Oil Slick; Authorities Considering Covering Mess With Giant Dome; Others Say Have 440 Munchkins Swim Around Site Continuously In Declining Concentric Circles; New evidence Suggests Wicked Witch Of The West May Behind It All.
--European Economy Still A Worry; Stocks Not Expected To Rebound In Early Trading.
--Consumer Spending: Clothing, Footwear Down Versus Year Ago; Electronics, Appliances Status Goods Up; Online Sales Continue To Show Monthly Gains..
--Dems Agree With GOP To Remove Perpetual $50 Billion Bailout Rainy Day Fund From Financial Regulations Bill.
--Incumbents Win Low Turnout Party Primaries In Ohio, Indiana and North Carolina.
--Picasso Sells For Record $106.5 Billion; Bidding On Furbish Paintings Halted After
Back to More Stuff:
The new musical comedy about Frankenstein is the latest example of stage fright.
The riots in Greece are a grim reminder of a world that has gotten too used to getting too much for contributing too little. The gimmie culture appears works when economies are growing beyond the limits of reality. But is totally unrealistic as a key component of true economic model. The truth is that an economy based on nothing of value added is unsustainable. It is simply a matter time until a tax based, no true growth society begins to crumble. And then the near impossible task of taking away begins.
Yahoo! Sports seems to be quoted as an authority more and more these days. But there is something about the phrase Yahoo! Sports that defies credibility in my mind. How about Zowie! Sports. Or Yikes! Sports.
Through the Same Eyes: Chapter 70 continues. “You had me flying all morning!” were the first words I heard as Paul answered his cell. I thought to myself that people don’t just say hello anymore, they have “openings! Ah, technology.
“And why would that be”, I answered coyly…like I used to. Now I felt guilt. Now I felt I didn’t deserve to be cute with Paul, my husband, the father of my children, the extraordinary man who made me rapturously happy until six months ago. Will I ever be happy?
“Are you zoning out again?” I heard Paul.
“Maybe I’ve been flying this morning too and the sound your voice sends me to new heights.” I paused, “What do you think?”
“I hope”, he answered very quickly.
He hopes? What does that mean?
“So, what do you want? Do you want me to come home”. I could feel a twinkle in his voice.
“That would be nice,” I answered primarily to keep him happy. He deserves that. “No, I’m going to be with Izzy and will meet Sally Ornstein later in the afternoon. She told me you might be there. And I hoped you would. That’s all.”
“I will continue to soar until I can look into your eyes later today. Bye!
Good by Paul” Now I really felt awful. I wonder what will happen when I see Kent?
While the nation continues to mourn the unfortunate deaths of 4 students – William Schroeder, Allison Krause, Jeffery Miller, Sandra Scheuer -- the FBI is releasing new evidence that show the National Guard was fired upon first and that the entire so-called student spontaneous protest was in fact highly radicalized. It was more likely a planned event that started with downtown riots under the leadership of anti-war activists and hard core radicals and culminated with the burning down to the ground of the ROTC building. That students “Trying to exercise their right” may have been mere pawns in a bigger plan. Do you think the radical leadership shares any guilt?
I’m finding annoying my friend who had his foot digits amputated. I must be lack-toes intolerant.
As I get older I notice that I look a lot better in pictures…when I don’t wear my glasses!
One reader writes that the proposed "Taco Bell sting' mentioned above would freak out politicians as voter rolls would be drastically reduced. What the hell. Just make em' up.
The Answer:
How many times have you smiled at the antics of John Cleese, Michael Palin, Terry Jones, Eric Idle, Terry Gilliam and Graham Chapman? You would have first saw them all together in 1969 on Monty Python’s Flying Circus. 1969?
A Punny finale:
Remember, a midget is the center engine on a three engine plane. Don’t be fooled. And if you aren’t confused yet, consider that Yeast is the direction you look at in the morning to watch the bun rise.
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