Today's Tids Issue 4,679
Saving America:
I have always preached using ice cream as a means to improve harmonious relations among all peoples regardless of heritage, religion and political motivation. The sweet, frozen cream of the eternal nectar has always had way of calming agitated emotions, helping foes agree jointly – We both like this stuff equally, so that’s a start. But, alas, an owner of a locally favorite ice Cream shop is threatening to close it all down until rude customers stop their aggressive attacks on 16-year-old servers. The eruptions occur mainly, but not only after people are asked to put on a mask to get served. How can people be so pathetic sometimes? If Ice Cream isn’t the answer, are we doomed?
“Who’s on First?” Isn’t that great – baseball is in the air again! Now when we tune in to sports talk shows they will be talking about lineups, who’s playing where. We’ll dissect batting averages and fielding flaws. And which pitchers are reaching 100 MPH. Yes, it’s been a long wait, but it is just that much sweeter to be back on the playing fields again where the focus is only how well they play the game and not necessarily how they fit into the pollical game. Paly ball! Go (Red) Sox.
As the national and local news media continue to achieve redundancy in daily reporting, The Tids’ crack reporters will be there scouring for you, making a concerted effort to uncover and bring a sampling of the thousands of stories that happen very day in the USA.
The only thing flat earthers fear is sphere itself.
The Question:
Since it looks like new episodes and new TV shows maybe not be with us until somewhat in the distant future, what are rated as the best bingeable shows on Netflix?
The Headlines:
--As Coronavirus Rise Sets Records In Some States, Stocks Dropping.
--Fauci And Medical Experts See Next Two Weeks As Critical To Planning For Future.
--Federal Appeals Court Orders Lower Court To Drop Flynn Case.
--Mail Balloting Slows Calling Races In NY And Kentucky; Trump Backed House candidates Lose In GOP Primaries In NC And Ky. AOC Retains Dem Backing; Key Dem Races, In Kentucky between Progressive Insurgent Charles Booker And Amy McGrath, and In NY Between Progressive Insurgent Jamal Bowman and Incumbent Eliot Engle Waiting For Paper Vote Counts; McConnell Wins Nomination.
--New Shootings In Seattle’s CHOP.
--Royal Caribbean Cancels Most Cruise Voyages; Joins Rest Of Cruise Industry In Dropping Anchors.
--Kim Suspends Military Action Against South Korea; Russia Parade Today Celebrates WWII Victory Over Germany.
--Aftershocks Slowing After Giant 7.4 Quake In Oaxaca State In Mexico.
The Topplers and Culture Cancellers are destroying people’s reputations without due process. Mob rule is not an alternative to a just legal proceeding. Unless, living in chaos is the objective.
Every time a lawmaker or Gov official rushes to sign away piece of our national fabric, it just sets a precedent to make it easier to continue to tear away a powerful heritage, stitch by stitch. Erode a foundation stone by stone.
The Big Tuna Conspiracy Price Fixing Caper reported here yesterday has become one of the most inquired about Tidlets of this year. The biggest tuna was hooked by the FBI after something fishy was a smelling badly, and assured consumers that a good tuna melt would be affordable again.
If we arm the teachers, do the librarians get silencers?
Lots of people lately have been throwing around the word “Scientists” as some kind of panacea for life itself. One of the words that comes to my mind when I hear the word scientist, is Mad.
You may have noticed that I have written in the past that there are no more puns. Well of course there are. And many of you sent in great classics, but I in my stubbornness rejected them because I also vowed never to repeat myself. Yes, I love making my life difficult. Yesterday I was reminded by a good reader that there are new people how have not seen some of the classic word play. What about us they are protesting. Our funny bone matters! So, the Editorial Board called an emergency meeting yesterday and has decided to give new readers an equal opportunity chance to laugh out loud, rolling on the floor with tears in their eyes. I have relented, and will over the next week or two play the classics.
The first two of our classic Puns are:
“I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.”
And a true classic:
“A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt, and is named 'Ahmal.' The other goes to a family in Spain. They name him 'Juan.’ Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
Stay tuned. We’re bringing the oldies back.
A well know behavioral syndrome is called “Intermittent Explosive Disorder”. It is defined as having periodic bursts of aggressive behavior “Grossly out of proportion to the situation”. I think it is dominating our society right now.
People are just looking for anger these days, and that noose at Talladega Nascar that wasn‘t a noose but garage door pull, is just the latest example of jumping to wrong conclusions..
I just read that a angry gang in Alaska want to pull down the statue of former US Secretary of State under Abe William Seward, you know the guy who was ridiculed for buying Alaska from Russia. They must be grasping at icicles up there trying to find something to tear down. After all, down in the lower states and territories Seward was well known as a strong abolitionist. But the angry mob there are intent tearing down because basically he was white man who came to a place he wasn’t wanted. Maybe the media will take a fresh look at their own reporting hysteria or is that “IED”.
If a statue crashes onto an urban square and nobody reports it, can you still hear the crash?
Earlier this week I went to my DVR to watch the attest Billions. All we saw was a notice that said “Billson will Return”. So, I went to trusty Google and learned that the producers have no idea when they will return with the next episode, as Covid has squashed production. Better find something outside to do.
The Answer:
You may want ot check out Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad, Stranger Things, Sherlock, The Office, Friends, Supernatural, Sons Of Anarchy, The Sopranos, How I met Your Mother, Dexter, Shameless, House, Better Call Saul, Band of Brothers. If you can get beyond Netflix, I’d look for Homeland and “24”.
I always like this song. Maybe it will carry you up and over Hump day.
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